Yes! Master this, and life becomes easier because you are living life, instead of ‘auditioning’ as Natasha sometimes refers to. When you realise who you are and what you’re worth, you become authentic through self acceptance. Only then will you be truly ‘seen’ by others. And only then will you tell the users and abusers to move on, because you won’t value the shi* they have to offer. Because you will know your own worth.
Advice from a male perspective anyone? I am dating a man who is 11 years older, I’m 26 and he is 37. He works out in the ocean and a lot of times we have minimal conversation via text/call. But when we are together everything is great and we get along very well. When he doesn’t have to wake in the wee ours or work out of town, he is with me every single weekend. We have been together six months and I have met all his close friends and friends kids. I have done well so far in respecting his space and he respects mine also. When he’s a weekend away with his guy friends, I am understanding and just ask him to contact me once when he is back in town so he feels he is not missing out on what he loves. However, this past weekend he had a sailboat race on the weekend which he let me know in advance and we made had plans for friday night. He reached out friday night saying that turns out he had to be at the venue in the wee hours so he would not be able to make our plans. I was emotionally unstable that weekend due to some work stress and family leaving so I needed him the most that friday. I did not think of my actions and instead of politely rescheduling for Monday, I blew him up – sent him various texts showing how I did not appreciate he canceled although it wasn’t his fault. I called numerous times in the weekend and texted many times while he was supposed to have time with his friends in the tournament. On Sunday I was so desperate that I passed by his house. His roommate was there and told me he hand’t come home yet. Since I blew him up friday, I have had no response to any of my texts nor has he answered any of my calls. I am very afraid that I scared him away and threatened his freedom. I also came out as desperate for going to his place. Today is Wednesday and I hadn’t reached out till Sunday. I sent him a very short/casual text today apologizing for taking out my stress on him and for not letting him have his space, to which I got no response. I am going to wait a few days and hopefully he will come around, as our relationship has matured and he’s told me how much he cares for me. Did I blow this up completely since it has been 4 days with no response?
If going no contact is just a little too harsh, or you don’t think you can pull it off for 30-60 days, you can try another method to get your ex to miss you. After a breakup, it’s normal to want to hear from your ex, and you may be sitting by the phone waiting for him to call or text you. If you’re responding to all of his messages within a nanosecond, you’re not even giving the guy the opportunity to miss you. You’re far too available, and this sends off a message to your ex that you'll be right there waiting for him at all hours of the day. So instead of being so eager, back off a little bit and let his text message sit in your inbox for a few hours before responding. Some may call this game playing, but we think it’s the perfect recipe to get your ex to miss you! He’ll wonder why you’re no longer so quick to respond to him, and it will definitely make him miss hearing from you.
Another important thing to take into consideration is that he’s a man and he may be acting in ways you, as a woman, don’t intuitively understand. Your guy is not your girlfriend. Guys like to deal with one thing at a time. If he has a lot on his plate, he may take his attention temporarily away from the relationship. This doesn’t always mean he’s losing interest, it could just mean he’s overwhelmed.
If you find that you never ever want space from him, it’s time for you to start finding your own space anyway. It’s not healthy for couples to spend all their time together. It can cause you to neglect your friends, family, and self. You can start to rely too much on this man (and, in my mind, you always need just a dose of independence for yourself) and lose your identity.
@ Jackie if a guy ever tell you to STOP calling/texting him give him just what he asking you for which is no contact It seems to me he got what he wanted sex from you and was No longer interested in anything other that. I know as a woman it hurts to be treated like that it happens but learn from it, next time take more time to get a real feeling of what a guy true intentions are in my opinion 1 month is too soon to give a guy your precious body too he obviously has moved on and so should you. Keep in mind he may reappear but you have to be a Strong woman and not go back to his way of treating you distancing himself from you be more available for the right guy to come into your life. Forgive him and dont look back go on with your life.

Even though this one may be hard to swallow because we value ourselves so highly as women and no one likes a blow to the ego or rejection, it’s important to talk about. Often times a man will show you signals of commitment but not want to commit to getting to know you. There are two principal reasons for this. Either they just don’t have interest in you and don’t want to hurt your feelings, or you fell in love too easily and they lost interest in the chase of getting their “prize”. I will go deeper into the meaning of the chase and the “prize” as we move along this article.
When he's feeling frequently put down, rejected, or demeaned, it's not uncommon for him to act in a cold and distant way because he doesn't want to engage with you at the risk of having another argument. Rather than fighting all the time, it's important that you and your man work on your listening and communication skills in order to handle your arguments in a constructive way that brings you closer together—rather than farther apart. 
Hello Adam. Thanks for offering such an exciting post and video. You’ve HIT the nail on the head! From my experience, yes, men totally enjoy their SPACE and we should make sure they get it. Respect his space and have him respect yours. Confident women with a touch of mystery and charm will most likely excite men to pursue and return again and again. I enjoy spontaneity and time spent exclusively enjoying my own range of soothing pleasures. First enjoy loving yourself – having a massage, facial, pedicure, and or just spending time at favorite events with other special friends and family. SPACE can make the relationship exciting!
So now that we know what the reasons might be, it's easier to understand how to react or, more importantly, how not to react. After careful observation of love and dating, this is what I know to be true: Convincing a man to love you will never work. Trying to persuade him to see how great you are together is pointless. Sharing your feelings with the hopes he will realize how much he means to you will also get you nowhere.
My guy is actually not in town and we hardly talk then there’s this other guy I met through a friend he’s so friendly and nice we talk like every single day and we talk like more than an hour but we’re not in a relationship and my guy and I haven’t spoken this long.please I need some help here because I don’t know what to do and I really love my bf alot…… words can’t explain what I feel for him

So me and this guy used to talk a lot face to face and then he asked for number one day and we texted all the time and spoke face to face but then after a year we no longer spoke face to face just cuz when we would act lovey dovey on text I started to freak out thinking it would be awkward face to face so yh that stopped but we still texted then I started liking him then ended up telllingg him n he said he liked me back but then his friend told me he was lying so I find out he was pretending cuz he felt bad even tho I said if. U don’t like me it’s okay.But yh we had a massively argument and didn’t speak for six weeks but I still liked him so being stupid I went running back and we have been talking ever since but now we have tiny arguments over silly stuff n he lied to me for the first time don’t get me wrong we still have a good time but I don’t know sometimes I feel like I’m wasting my time cuz I put effort it like I always text first n when I told him that he said it’s because he doesn’t kno when to and I’m like does it look like I know when ur available? No but I still text u. He also has this bff of his a girl who I get his close with but the pics they post together are couple-y. And Ik me and him ain’t together but I need advice, do I stop talking to him or what?
3. Forgiveness. The majority of young and middle-age men I have interviewed say that forgiveness is "huge" to them, and that grudges are wedges in their relationships. When these issues arise, they're ready to have the "relationship talk." Psychologist Sonja Lyubomirsky of the University of California, Riverside has written of the importance of the forgiveness factor in relationships.
One of the most important pieces of relationship advice for women is to have fun with your partner. Being able to joke around, go on adventures, and laugh together as a couple will help you be better able to weather any future storms that may arise. You and your partner should make an effort to go out, bring back date night, travel to exotic places, and try new things as a couple in order to keep the spark alive between the two of you. So instead of sitting on the couch each night binge-watching Netflix, take your relationship out of the house and find new and exciting activities to try.
He will definitely notice that you’re not as available as you once were, and it will add just the right amount of fear into the situation. Your guy will be worried that another guy will snag your attention, and it will definitely cause him to spring into action. Knowing that other men are attracted to you will definitely make your guy take the next step by finally asking you to be in a committed relationship with him!
So, let’s start with why this has become such a common trend in our 21st century of dating. Now more than ever, men are finding it hard to commit to a woman. This is especially true when there are so many outside sources that hinder commitment and so many women who are not being authentic and true to who they are and what they want. It’s like this saying I heard a while back. “Once sex got easier to get, love got harder to find.” This may be true to an extent and we can discuss further why.
Three weeks ago I had birthday and he said he would celebrate with me. Last minute he cancelled due to work so I was very upset:( After that I asked him to not communicate with me because I am angry at him. We went quite for a weeks and later started being in touch but since that time he’s contact me is much less frequent and he never calls me – just text. But he still writes that he loves me so much and he misses me!! I do not understand his behavior… Please tell me what you think…
I met my BF six months ago. I thought things were going great. If he needs me to do things for him I do if I can. Usually because of our work schedules we only see each other on the weekends so I am not crowding him. We have never had a bad argument although he has made me mad before I get over things quickly. Then out of the blue he stopped calling and returning my calls. Was he hurt or dead? I drove to his house and knocked. No answer although his truck was there. I left a note but haven’t heard back. It’s been two weeks. I’m very hurt and confused. I feel like I could be okay with giving him space if he had said he needed space. At least then I wouldn’t have to speculate. I had told him I loved him and maybe he freaked out. But I believe if you feel it. Should say it because tomorrow is not promised and I don’t want to regret not saying it. FYI my BF is twice divorced. Maybe that’s why he’s freaked.
And lastly, many men are from poorer school districts which graduate young men from high school unable to even read at a fourth-grade level. If you’re from a poor neighborhood, your school doesn’t have nearly as much money to hire good teachers as do schools in wealthy neighborhoods; nor will your parents likely read to you. All this leaves semi- or illiterate men feeling chronically inferior to other men, and undeserving of the blessing of raising children and being in a good marriage. As one man told my mother, being illiterate means that anybody else has a knife that they can stab you in the back with any time they want.
We're fully aware that both men and women can be problematic in a relationship, however, some may consider men to be more of a nuisance than women, if that's the case for you, and you're a woman seeking advice on your current dating situation, this relationship advice for women forum is a good place to start. Whether your man isn't pleasing you enough, he's causing problems or you think he's cheating, this is the best place to get some tips and guidance. If you're a male that's looking for advice, then we would suggest posting in our relationship advice for men board instead.
Think beyond dinner and after-drinks for your next date. "The best type of date allows you to stop texting, put the phone down, and really foster a deep connection," Kelman says. Restaurants can be nice, but try something a little outside your comfort zone from time to time. Check out a craft beer festival, see a local band at some hole-in-the-wall, or challenge them to a mountain bike race. A new adventure can fortify your relationship since it gives you shared memories to reminiscence about later, and that stronger bond will increase the likelihood they'll want to keep seeing you, exclusively. (Here are more active date ideas for any season.)
What do you mean exactly by taking a step back? Seeing each other every few weeks already seems like a fairly large step back. How often do you guys talk during the day? Sometimes, talking on the phone or computer is what actually takes up the most time. Before you can figure out how to keep the relationship going, you need to figure out what you mean by taking a step back. Do you mean just talking on the weekends? Or only talking for a maximum of 30 minutes a day? I think that if you do not bother him too much (Which, let’s be honest, happens to just about everyone after a break up) with texts and calls, I think that he will start to miss you. If he is as perfect for you as he says, then he will end up thinking about you just as much or more after the break up. If I were you, I would just tone down the messages and calls. Wait for him to come around, and if he does not, you know that the relationship is over.
This was and interesting article. I’ve been seen a man for nearly a year. He has told me he loves me, but I get mixed messages and it’s causing me to be confused about the longevity of our relationship. He doesn’t plan time for dates or going out. He might say come to dinner the next day, but I might not hear from him about dinner, like he forgot. I feel that a lot of what we do is based on him and although he might ask my opinion, it’s often is not taken. I don’t feel like a priority to him. I’m confused, but I am in love with him. Help
You know, for once, I might sound like a counselor or a typical veteran, having played the 'Love Mentor' for my friends during high school by shelling out canny advice on making your boyfriend miss you. But there's more I can tell you, from an experience of a debilitated soul, that the key to get him back into your arms is to pull yourself away, for a while, from his. Absence makes the heart go fonder, or so the cliché goes (the cliché sucks, anyway).
On the other hand, you’re wild and out of control in areas where it counts: like sex! A man wants to feel like he’s losing control sexually, like you’re even more insatiable than he is. You want sex more than he does, if that’s even possible, and there are no taboos you’re unwilling to discuss. You’re not a prude. You just haven’t decided yet, whether he’s worthy of you and knowing your fantasies.

We all know that distance makes the heart grow fonder. When we are together all the time with someone, it can become quite boring and even annoying after a while, depending on the relationship. Being together constantly can take a huge toll on how you feel about each other, which is why experts recommend that giving each other reasons to miss each other may just be the best thing that you can do for your relationship.
There are many strategies to turn bad habits into good habits. It’s not enough to just say you will quit something for good. It requires hard work and persistence when making a life change. Ask yourself how to break a bad habit that is damaging to your lifestyle. Then research the necessary steps to overcome the bad habit. Stick to the plan to be self-disciplined in your behaviors.

Jealousy can be a tricky beast with which to contend. However, there’s no easier way to make an ex miss you than to move onto another guy, or make him think you have. Whenever you go to a place where you know your special someone’ll be, make sure you bring another guy along. It could be just a friend or a potential new flame. As long as the ex sees you moving on, it is a near certainty that he will think of all the good times you had and miss what he once had. Guys are competitive and seeing you with another man is going to bring out the warrior in him. He’s going to want to win you back! Do not pay any attention to him during a time like this, instead say a quick “hello” and spend the rest of the night admiring the new man in your life. He’s going to go home thinking of you and it’s going to make him miss you terribly.


we are in a long distance relationship and i am a school student where as he goes to office for work . i miss him very much . i just called him and he was irritated so i had to leave him alone. the next time we'll meet will be in summers and its very hard but i feel better keeping myself busy as to know our importance in each other's lives...i have my exam on my head but he is occupied in my heart :(
"Be more assertive if you're interested in a guy. Sometimes reading signals from women feels a bit like reading brail if you're not blind. There are a lot of ways a girl can show she's interested without going overboard, like a subtle touch or giving a little extra attention at a party. If a guy knows you're interested there's a big chance he'll become interested too." Josh F
I tried to ask him why and fix things but it got worse everytime I tried and when we were on the ph he ignored me the calls were silent and when I did say something he ignored me :( we used to be close we were friends on snapchat he chose to ignore me but still watched my mystory and it went on like that 4 weeks till I got upset and blocked him on my snapchat but still have him on Skype and his # we even would mail each other presents for holidays I fear he may have moved on and doesn’t like me anymore
Trust your instincts from the very first contact with a potential boyfriend.  Did he get a little too drunk on your initial dates?  A man who can’t get through the early stages of a relationship without using alcohol may have substance abuse issues.  Is he perpetually late, always offering bogus excuses?  He doesn’t value your time so don’t expect him to suddenly be punctual when you need him to be somewhere important.  Do you get a sense he is hiding something when he finds reasons why you can never come to his place?  Key into your visceral responses when you pick up vibes that don’t sit right with you.  Don’t make the mistake so many women make, thinking that all these negative behaviors will change once he falls in love with you.  They won’t.  They may even get worse.
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You are in many ways his wife and his mistress in one person. You have perfect control over your emotions. You always present your “better self” to him. You avoid all the clingy behaviors that you know will turn him off. You’re friendly and mature…because you know you’re attractive. You don’t have to throw a tantrum just to keep his interest. No desperate tactics.
Keep him on his toes a little to make him wonder where you stand sometimes. Asking him what he is doing every minute of every day and planning things to do without giving him the opportunity to say yes or no can be signs you are becoming clingy and falling too easily for him. As we all know, it should be a mutual chase between the man or the woman. If the balance is off, it becomes too easy for him to take you for granted.
I have a question, more than a comment. I’ve been dating this guy off and on for 4yrs it’s been really hard for him to find a job. He had asked me for some money to fix his car. I asked him to give me the name of exact part that was needed he asked why. I responded and said so I can look for it on line. He said no. Next day I said well whats the game plan, when will you get your car fixed? I suggested I’ll pick you up you can stay at my house, drop me off at work and you can get the part you need. He said no. Finally the next day he said his grandma will let him borrow the money but she expected it back the next day. Well I had agreed to give him the money to pay back, but after thinking about it I decided not to go along with it. Before letting him know I wasn’t willing to give him the money I had asked will you be staying tonight when you come get the money? He said no, but I will this weekend. That’s what drew the line, and I told him he’s either lying or had something else going on that he didn’t want me to know. After all this I was the bad person and he called me every name in the book. I did apologize for what I had done but that he was being very wishy washy and I didn’t understand was he was up too. I did let him know our relationship was over and it was beyond repair. My question is, how do you see this, was I wrong? Was he just using me?
I’ve been seeing a guy for about six months now. Everything in the relationship is great- we get along, we have fun together, we just get each other. The only thing is he won’t commit to me. He said he wasn’t hooking up with anyone else, only me, but he’s not ready to use titles.  I know his last relationship ended badly, so that might be part of it. I just don’t get it, the relationship is so great in every way aside from this.

But it’s not good enough to pretend to be less interested, you actually need to take some steps to take your mind off of him, what he’s doing and what he’s thinking. Get busy with work or school, stop contacting him as much, and don’t be so quick to respond to his messages and calls. He will wonder what happened to make you back off, and it will definitely make him want to commit.

The ironic thing about playing hard to get is that it can work, but it’ll work on the wrong kind of guy. If the only reason he’s into you is that you’re hard to catch, what will you do once he’s caught you? You can’t stay in the limbo phase of the relationship forever. If a guy isn’t interested in the authentic you, playing the enigmatic mystery girl will only work for a brief period of time.


He could have realized that things are starting to get more serious with you, and it could have scared him off. He may also be waiting to text you again just to make sure that your relationship with each other stays in the “friends with benefits” realm instead of becoming something else. If you do want to make your relationship more serious though, you should talk to him about what he wants. You have already dated him for two years, and you will end up in the same position in another two years unless you actually figure out where you relationship stands. There is nothing wrong with having a long-term friends with benefits situation, but both partners should know that is the case and want the relationship to be just casual.
You begin interacting with the thoughts in your head rather than with the person in front of you. Rather than trying to learn who he is and what he’s about, you look at his behavior and the things he says as a means to measure how he feels about you… and whether you’re getting closer or further away from your goal of having a relationship with him.

The trick is to actually do things that you like and to actually do something. That way you will put some distance between the two of you during times that you are not normally apart, benefit from expanding your talents, skills, or knowledge, and have something to show for it when you get back together. You will be able to fill your guy in on what you learned, what you did, and how much fun it was, which is much more exciting than the same old conversations you have day in and day out.

Sound familiar? If yes, then you need to stop interrupting him and start listening. We all aren’t always in the mood for listening someone, and find our stories more interesting. However, what he tells you about childhood, work, friends and coworkers speaks a lot about him. You can easily conclude who he is deep within. Instead of interrupting and talking about yourself you can ask him if he would like to have a dog in the future.
Your man wants to know you appreciate him for who he is and what he brings to the relationship. If you love him, make sure he knows. Keep in mind Dr. John Gottman’s 5:1 ratio of positive to negative interchanges. For every one negative remark you make, try to think of five positive things to say, to counteract the negative effects of a critical word. Try carving out a few minutes each day before bed where you share with your partner what you appreciate about him and why.
I might feel a bit regret for loving him that i feel heartbroken now..But whatever it is, the days we spent together was really one of the happiest moment in my life so i never regretted every moment of it. Bad news is, i find it hard to move on.. like seriously am i obsessed with him now? it feels like hopes are there you know, and its not giving up. i just wanted to talk to him. A single hey from him would make my year, but it seems like impossible. *sigh* life…
This was and interesting article. I’ve been seen a man for nearly a year. He has told me he loves me, but I get mixed messages and it’s causing me to be confused about the longevity of our relationship. He doesn’t plan time for dates or going out. He might say come to dinner the next day, but I might not hear from him about dinner, like he forgot. I feel that a lot of what we do is based on him and although he might ask my opinion, it’s often is not taken. I don’t feel like a priority to him. I’m confused, but I am in love with him. Help

Everyone recognizes when someone has an agenda, it’s just something our intuition picks up on and it immediately puts us off. Think about how you feel when someone approaches you and tries to sell something. Your first instinct is typically to get far away from them. It doesn’t matter how nice and friendly they are, you can’t trust them because you know they want something out of you.


He may have feelings for you. He probably has very strong feelings for you. He likely is concerned that if the two of you develop a relationship at this time, that he will not act in a mature enough manner and may damage your friendship. If you want to move into a relationship with him, then explain that you know that the both of you care about each other and you are not going to hurt him. Let him know that you trust him not to hurt you. Best of luck, Vicki!

Everyone I seem to talk to has the same feeling: Dating has become so hard. It seems like nobody wants to commit anymore, and it seems to be a challenge every single step of the way. You can blame the dating apps. You can blame Tinder, and Bumble, and Hinge, and all the choices that people have. Because for the very, very first time in history, men and women have a ridiculous amount of choices available to them. Read more →
There are many strategies to turn bad habits into good habits. It’s not enough to just say you will quit something for good. It requires hard work and persistence when making a life change. Ask yourself how to break a bad habit that is damaging to your lifestyle. Then research the necessary steps to overcome the bad habit. Stick to the plan to be self-disciplined in your behaviors.

Português: Fazer Ele Sentir Sua Falta, Español: hacer que él te extrañe, Italiano: Fargli Sentire la Tua Mancanza, Deutsch: Wie ich ihn dazu bekomme mich zu vermissen, Français: faire pour que vous lui manquiez, Русский: заставить его скучать по тебе, 中文: 让他想念你, Bahasa Indonesia: Membuat Dia Merindukan Anda, Nederlands: Ervoor zorgen dat hij je gaat missen, Čeština: Jak zařídit, aby vás postrádal, ไทย: ทำให้เขาคิดถึงคุณ, Tiếng Việt: Khiến chàng nhớ bạn, العربية: جعل الشاب يشتاق إليك, 日本語: 彼氏の気を引く, 한국어: 그가 당신을 그리워하게 만드는 방법, हिन्दी: अपने हसबैंड या बॉयफ्रेंड को अपनी याद दिलाएँ
High levels of stress can do many things including destroy relationships.  If the stress of commitment is getting to him you may find him pulling away until it clears.  If you chase after him in you could find the result is that you have pushed him clear out of your life.  Give him space and time to think.  Be available but create that mystique that found him seeking you out in the first place. i.e Just be You
Hey girl, I don´t want to be rude intruding in something that´s clearly none of my business, but reading you has made me very upset about you boyfriend, or well, the father of your child. He needed space, but started seing someone else? I know you must love him, but that´s not a mature way to behave. If he can´t be responsible for his actions and its consequences, you should better move on. And you say it was a planned pregnancy, so there was a discussion and plenty of time to declare that he was not sure about it, if that is the case. It is very unfair that now he gets to decide if he wants to be there, in this stage of life, if he is “ready”, while you are already pregnant and shouldn´t it be something just yours. He is inmature, selfish and irresponsible, you don´t need another child to raise but the one you are carrying. So, I send you from very far away, all my strenghts and good wishes, put yourself up together and love yourself, so once the baby is born he/she will have a caring mom. The best for you and your baby, take care of yourself…
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