I might feel a bit regret for loving him that i feel heartbroken now..But whatever it is, the days we spent together was really one of the happiest moment in my life so i never regretted every moment of it. Bad news is, i find it hard to move on.. like seriously am i obsessed with him now? it feels like hopes are there you know, and its not giving up. i just wanted to talk to him. A single hey from him would make my year, but it seems like impossible. *sigh* life…
Hi, I have been talking with a man that is older then me. He is very private and he needed space so I gave it to him. Out of respect cause I once was in his shoes. And found myself again when i had my own time. We haven’t had sex in the months we been together. Just talking and enjoying one another company. There are times he asks me to stay with him more now days and I do. Still no Sex, alot of kissing and holding. Then we both stop one another before it goes further. Why? Idk but we respect one another more. But I have noticed we have recently stopped talking like we use to. The convos shorten. Our conversations are about our days, and some sexting or just straight talk n tease about being romantic. We just have fun. I do know he dont to hurt me, n he is afraid of his own actions. He’s the touchy feely type with women. And it surprises him I don’t get mad or jealous. He tells me he ain’t use to the way I act towards stuff like that. I’ve asked him if he’s trying to push me away he says no then he says maybe… I don’t feel he is cheating, I just think we are both scared to take the next step. Cause we both hurt and was hurt in our last relationships. Getting confused need some advice.

Instead of trying to fix it and reel him back, forgive yourself for being needy, acknowledge that it’s OK and everything will be fine, and give him some space to come to you. Don’t inundate him with texts or snap chats or G-chats or anything. Just let it be and give him the space to find his way back to you. And in that time, enjoy your life and find ways to be happy. Do not spend this time obsessing over him and wondering if you ruined this relationship forever. Be confident in yourself and try to internalize the fact that you deserve an amazing relationship and with the right person it will happen freely and won’t need to be forced.


This is important for you and for him.    Your body and mind are reflections of your well-being so devote time and money to your self-care.  Your man is attached to you both emotionally and physically, so it is worth maintaining both your outward appearance and your mental health by paying attention to their good working state.  Don’t let yourself go.  Eat healthfully and incorporate physical movement into your day.  Take time to practice activities that nourish your spirit and challenge your mind.
3. Generosity of spirit. Women appreciate men who are not just good money managers but are also generous in spirit. Giving men value women; in talking to men it is refreshing to find how many really enjoy coming up with gifts that they know will be appreciated. These men also understand reciprocity—that giving a woman pleasure will result in her desire to give pleasure to him. The late sexologist Carol Botwin noted in her book, Love Crisis: Hit-and-run Lovers, Jugglers, Sexual Stingies, that withholding traits carry over into sex and doom relationships.
Commitment is a funny thing. We allow our desire for it and other people’s promises of it, to blind and paralyze us from seeing and acting upon red/pink flags that are often, right in front of our face from the get-go. “How to get him to commit to a serious relationship,” is something I’ve Googled too many times to count. I ended up finding the answer through life-living, mistake-making, time-wasting decisions that sabotaged the chances of anyone ever wanting to commit to me in any regard.

Hey.. I’m in love with this guy for almost 6 months now and we are in a long distance relationship..since from the day we met he treated me like I’m the only girl in the world he respect me like I’m around him always he calls me day and night.. And we hardly see each other because of his work and the distance between us.. Few days back I visited him where he stays and he introduced me to everyone around him and everything was good until I hold his phone while he was asleep.. I found out that his cheating for me which changed everything ..I’m a Moody person.. Then I asked him everything and he answered me some not everything.. Then he apologized about his doings and promise me that he will short everything out soon.. And I did forgiven him but sometimes i feel like I have done a wrong thing it will happen again and we are living miles apart so I’m afraid.. Please I need an advice on what to do!
I saw a whatsapp pick of a workmate on my guys phone, he said he used it to let someone leave him alone I got a bit jealous and now he for the first time in our relationship got distant and didn’t answer my calls or texts, I decided to leave him alone since he’s very busy with work but I saw him and it seems he’s chasing me down and came up to me, we had a good brief conversation, though short but I can sense he was happy to see me.

Understanding that you do not need a man in order to be the best version of yourself is crucial. Loving yourself and doing exactly what makes you happy is key, which means that you need to know how to be happy alone. When you have this type of mentality, you will be able to spot red flags instantly and become more admirable. If a man wants to be with you, he will make it known throughout the relationship. He will make it known in healthy ways of properly courting you. He’s not going to send you the late night 11 pm or 1 am text for you to come over and “watch a movie.”

Typically, men love to see their woman as a prize that they need to work for. They see the woman that they choose to be with as an accomplishment and as someone that took work to earn. It might sound a little silly but it’s true. Men love to know a woman has a mind of her own, is confident, and isn’t easy to get. So, men pull away when women get too clingy. Do not start canceling all your plans to be available to him every day all day.

They tell us they aren't capable of being in a long-term, exclusive relationship. They tell us they think women are controlling and selfish and don't know how to stop feeling that way. And yet we bypass these statements. The words go in one ear and out the other. Or we remember them but refuse to believe them. We tell ourselves, "He's just wounded!" or "He's lying to protect himself."
I'm not saying that men are right in pulling away, they also need to acknowledge the part they play in bringing out the worst side of a woman's fears. But just for your sake, for the sake of your mental and emotional health, just let go… anyway this is not the time to be having "talks" about the relationship because he'll most likely be unable (or unwilling) to have such deep convos during such a time.

If you’re like most women out there who are dating but not yet in a serious relationship, it’s probable that you’re curious about how to get your current guy to commit. Perhaps it seems like it’s headed in that direction, but you want to be sure. Or maybe it’s something new and you want to know if and when it will have a future. It’s really confusing when a guy acts like he’s very interested in and cares about you, but he makes no steps to commit to you. Ladies, welcome to the club.
Adam, amazing video, I am impressed! Please keep up the good work! I am a single woman and I have responded to a handsome man’s flirts after like 2 months of him making it more obvious…I have put the breaks on from the beginning and to my surprise he kept insisting and making it more obvious! Here is the catch: I have rewarded him by teasing him a bit and introducing myself and being bold a little bit, bc I wanted him to get a reward and to know what he’s been doing is what I like…however, once I got to feel a bit “more comfortable” and start making small conversations here and there ( every 2 weeks or so, when we run into each other), he now started to pull away slightly, and I didn’t do ANYTHING about it, literally, just being myself, feminine, relaxed, NOT bothered by his pulling away…NOW, this guy didn’t even ask me out, but his face lightened up, he couldn’t stop smiling, it was in his eyes, face, everywhere, of course I noticed how much he liked me…I am a bit confused now, bc he worked hard ( 2 months) to get my attention and get a reward ( me teasing him, introducing myself, giving him a sign that I like him too) to only create a bit of distance once I feel more comfortable! Given that we never went out ( he didn’t ask for a ph number or anything) what should I do? We run into each other when I get off gym and he is at work! Last night I had seen him squeezing his head after me when I passed by (at his work place) and he seemed to careless about him being at work and have his employees seeing him doing that squeezing head after a woman but care far more FOR ME NOT TO SEE HIM squeezing his head to check me out! What happens? he made it plain obvious BEFORE for 2mo, now he seems to create distance but checks me out secretly ( or so he thinks :)). Should I say something given taht he didn’t even make a move on me, or should I allow his teh space he seems to want? I want to give this man a real chance, I liked his persistence :).
Knew this guy in middle school he was in love with me.. lost touch and about 2 months we started talking. But I always have to call him.think he called me twice so far including returned phone calls. And he always dose the talking always when i talk its interruptred are non responcive. ButTalked daily and decided to meet briefly about two weeks ago. We talked for a about 15 20 min.then it went real fast real quick. I said no a few times before I just gave in. Now its we talk every other day to maybe once a week. He’s said a few times about going out before sex and once after but includes that we should end that date with sex. I have asked him where he stands after we had sex the next day made it clear that was not like me and that it was to soon. He said it was built up and he agrees it was soon. Says he is content with his life but then says if he didn’t want to talk to me he’d say so……..I feel like I f***ed up by haven sex to soon and all he wants is ass now. What do u think
I believe a week or maximum of two weeks in the first 6 months or so of getting to know each other is okay – for him to retreat into his man cave. If he’s going for longer than that after the first 6 months of the relationship or continuing to pull away altogether, you’re wasting your time on him. He’s not ready to settle down or simply just not into you, period. Walk away, girlfriend.
A couple days later he’s still acting distant and he’s being short with me over text and I’ve tried asking him to come over but he’d say he has to clean his house or that he can’t then after goes to hang out with his friends knowing I asked him earlier if he could come over. And usually he would come hang out with me since we haven’t been hanging out instead of going out with his friends. I just feel after that that this is a sign that I need to let him have his space even though we haven’t hanged out in almost a week, I really hope this works because one of my girl friends said that he’s obsessed with me and that he said that I’m the ONE. He’s even thought of wedding ideas I mean c’mon he sounds like he’s head over heals for me right? and I just don’t see him going from loving me so much to distancing himself from me and not even wanting to see each other it seems. Maybe it was something I said to him over text to make him upset? I just don’t know but I will do anything to go back to the status of what our relationship was once before this all happened.
I am dating a guy in a distance relationship for about three months, at the beggining we felt unbelievable connection soulmate like, he said he wants to marry and have children, he was caring and sweet (flowers, gifts, lots of time together). However I know he cheated on me at the very beginning of dating (I forgived him because that was very fresh relation).
Hi Adam, am from Nigeria, i have being talking to a guy i met on dating app for some days now he seems really good & we talked alot he lives in USA but promise to visit me soon in my country i really like him, but there’s something wired about him, not up to 5days we met he talks about sex & how he want us to make babies together for me i think is too early to say such things i feel his faking it, now i always text him first before we start a conversation though his a busy bussinnes man, i want to stop being the one to start the conversation first, what do you think. I don’t want to lose him either, i don’t know what to do.
Actions do speak louder than words and when it comes to communication with your man, up to 85% comes from your body language. It’s normally the physical draw that gets the conversation going. When it comes to the chemistry, it’s the pheromones that certain people are drawn to. Researchers believe this is what makes people want more after the first signs of physical attraction.
When you’re in a relationship and things are going well, you want to know whether it has a future. You’ve probably been dating a while, but you’ve found yourself in a sticky conundrum. You want to push things forward, but you’re unsure if your guy wants the same. Some men aren’t ready for that level of commitment, and some men will never be ready. I’ve known women who have dated men for eight, even ten years, waiting and waiting for him to propose. Much to their disappointment, they find out that he enjoyed the current setup they have and doesn’t want things to change.

I have been seeing a guy for just about a year. His job is giving him a lot of stress and he became much more distant. For a whole year, he never missed a good morning or night text. We never texted all day long as we are both busy but that one morning text we sent each other was just enough to let us both know we were thinking of one another. His stopped pretty abruptly. My initial reaction was to panic and I did in a way but didn’t let him see that. Last weekend he apologized for not texting me so much but to trust that he still loves me. I was a bit stumped because I never once verbalized anything about the non texting issue, so I wondered why he would say that. I asked him if he would prefer me not text him at all during the week ( which I never did anyway, only one morning text and maybe a “have a good afternoon”) and he said yes, unless it was important.
You've been seeing this guy or girl at least once a week for a few months now. You're both sushi aficionados, his or her big brown eyes make you melt, or they even laugh out loud at The Mindy Project with you. It's great—except that you have no idea where things stand. They have yet to introduce you as their girlfriend or bring up being exclusive, and you're craving that "couple" title and the security that comes with it. Talk about blurred lines.
One of the reasons he liked the initial date was because he thought you were mysterious. You didn’t talk as much back then. He had to entertain you, he had to work hard to get you to open up to him. The fact remains that men love mystery! They love it when women give them a little and make them work for more. When you volunteer information constantly, men don’t place as much value in that information. When you avoid giving details and keep things as vague as possible it challenges him.
I was in a friends with benifits relationship and after a couple of months i told him i loved him i knew he didnt feel that way for me but i was ok with it . We spent alot of time together alot of sex and got on a rutine i would stay over night one day a week and we did dinner and drinks watch games etc i thought things were great. Then he needed space blew me off for the weekend and now barly talks to me he is 54 and in am 47 at our age we know what we want but i do love him and just dont know what to do i tried to talk to him and he just says he needs space.. do you think he is not coming back? Do you think hes scared ? I dont know what to do
Be mysterious and surprising. If you are a complete open book when you first meet a guy, it won’t leave him with anything to be surprised by. Instead, you should tell an interesting fact about yourself each time you get together. This will leave your guy wanting to hear more about you, and waiting to find out what new thing he'll learn next. Be spontaneous with him. If you usually go to dinner for dates, invite him on an adventure like rock climbing one day. This spontaneity will excite him and keep him guessing at what you’ll want to do next.
Instead of trying to fix it and reel him back, forgive yourself for being needy, acknowledge that it’s OK and everything will be fine, and give him some space to come to you. Don’t inundate him with texts or snap chats or G-chats or anything. Just let it be and give him the space to find his way back to you. And in that time, enjoy your life and find ways to be happy. Do not spend this time obsessing over him and wondering if you ruined this relationship forever. Be confident in yourself and try to internalize the fact that you deserve an amazing relationship and with the right person it will happen freely and won’t need to be forced.
But FACT is that you have 2 choices (regardless of whether he’s a jerk and blowing you off, or if he genuinely cares about you and just needs space), you can chase after him demanding answers, or you can just breathe and get your own space, some me-time, rejuvinate yourself, get happy again outside of him. In time he will either disappear, never to be seen again, or he will come back. The point is that either way you will be fine because you’re happy anyway. This compared to chasing him, hunting him down, where you lose yourself in trying to get him/get answers/get even <– this is not healthy, and you end up sadder than if you just let go.

If going no contact is just a little too harsh, or you don’t think you can pull it off for 30-60 days, you can try another method to get your ex to miss you. After a breakup, it’s normal to want to hear from your ex, and you may be sitting by the phone waiting for him to call or text you. If you’re responding to all of his messages within a nanosecond, you’re not even giving the guy the opportunity to miss you. You’re far too available, and this sends off a message to your ex that you'll be right there waiting for him at all hours of the day. So instead of being so eager, back off a little bit and let his text message sit in your inbox for a few hours before responding. Some may call this game playing, but we think it’s the perfect recipe to get your ex to miss you! He’ll wonder why you’re no longer so quick to respond to him, and it will definitely make him miss hearing from you.
I recently broke up with my partner of 5 years. We have our ups and downs, sometimes we are fine but most of the time we argue about the smallest things. We were very comfortable with each other, i wouldn’t say our relationship was the most exciting, however he was very good to me. He would put me first and every time we argued, he would come back to me first. This time however, we argued again and I tried to resolve the issue however, I think he had reached his limit with me. I initiated the breakup the day because I was so angry, so we ignored each other for a week. I pretty much got over it and wanted things to go back to normal, so I asked him if he wanted to break up for real and he said yes. Being the stubborn and prideful person that I am, I just stayed silent and let it happened. He then moved out of my place and since then we haven’t spoken to each other. Although I was the one who initiated the breakup, it feels like he was the one who broke up with me because deep down, I did not want to break up. I guess I was just too stubborn to say otherwise. I thought that he would come back to me like he usually does but this time he did not. I ended up blocking him on everything, something I wished I didn’t do because now I want to talk to him, but can’t because my pride won’t allow me to unblock him. I did unblock him one time to contact him to tell him to pick up the rest of his things at my place. He then asked to see me one more time for ‘old time sakes’ which was heart wrenching for me because the whole time I thought maybe he would come back to me, but from that one sentence, it finally made me realise that it really was the end and he did not want to get back with me. Instead of saying how I really felt during that time (that I was no longer angry and I missed him and wanted him back) I ended up cutting all ties with him by saying that I never wanted to see him again and what’s done is done. Now I fully regret what I said because I really do want him back. Since then, he has not spoken to me and I really want to message him. My mind wants to do it but my body won’t let me. Personally, I can see why the no contact rule would work. It normally works for me, but I guess everyone has a limit and if you are going to ignore someone for so long then there is a higher chance they will take that as you not caring and will move on with their life. Although I am not going to contact him despite missing him and regretting breaking up with him, I just want to say that if you really like someone and you want them back, throw away your pride and stubbornness and just message them. Tell them how you feel. If they still love you, they will come back to you, if they don’t then they will say so. Only then will you get closure and move on with your life. After reading everyone’s experience, I would say the easiest thing for your mind and heart is just to communicate with your ex and see where you stand. Don’t be like me and hold back what you want to say because at the end of the day, it will only make you feel more regretful. Basically how I feel right now because I can’t seem to take my own advice lol.

I listen to your Video. ..How to Make Him miss you. I really wish I would have listen to your video before hand I did everything wrong because I wasnt aware. Well low and behold he broke up with me and it hurt pretty badly for 4months. I can see in his eyes it hurt him to do that. We both had strong feelings for each other and the Love making was on the top of the chart. Ive learned alot from now to then. He’s back in my Life and I truly Love him as if he never left were able to pick up from where we left off. I want this to work with him forever. I want him to be my last relationship.

Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit gettingrelationshipsright.com for more resources to help your relationships.


My ex and I were together for 2 and a half years and spoke for four years, we broke up nearly two years ago and I ended it as I didn’t feel it anymore but then I really regretted it months later and all that time he was struggling to get over me he said then we had a year of not talking and then he reached out on my birthday and we’ve been texting since (my birthday was December) I also saw him on a night out and we hugged and we had a laugh and catch up and then his friends asked him to come home and he said I’ll see you in a bit to them and he stayed with me and then later on we hugged and went home with our own friends, but yeah we’ve spoke everyday since December and it’s long paragraphs but only 3 times a day and they aren’t flirty they are just conversations and have a laugh but I’ve not really sensed any flirting. But what does this mean? I know he cares about me as he said this ages ago but I don’t know feelings wise how he feels? I don’t want to ask as it would potentially ruin things or could backfire but I’m not sure as I can’t read the signs?
You guys fell in love for a reason, and while there are multiple reasons for your love, one of the biggest factors will be your personality. Show him what he’s missing by having fun and being yourself. We don’t mean go out and have fun without him, it’s more about making him realize why he loved you in the first place. By showing him the different sides to your personality you will allow him to come to his senses and tell you how much he misses you and can’t wait to see you.
Men are always more attracted to women who seem successful, independent (in career and in personal interests) and who are “busier” than average. This immediately shows a man you can handle yourself and your own issues, and you don’t “need” him to save you. The fact that you’re busy all the time shows high value – he really has to try to get your attention!
You already have your revamped wardrobe, and that balayage hair treatment has your entire appearance on fleek. Now, all you need to do is whip your body into shape. After being in a relationship with your ex, it’s possible that you packed on a few love pounds, and now’s the time to shed them! Reactivate that gym membership, throw on your favorite pair of sneakers, and dust off your Lululemon pants. It’s time to sculpt your “revenge body” that will make your ex regret the day the two of you parted ways. By looking and feeling amazing from the inside out, your ex will know that you’ve moved on, and you’re life is headed in a positive direction. It will definitely crush his ego a bit, and he will start to reminisce about all the good days the two of you shared. Prepare to receive a phone call or a text message from him spilling his guts about how much he misses you!
Before you can call him your boyfriend and organize a group chat with your friends on how to make him want a relationship, you have to know who he is. We all idealize our man, and became blind to some deal breakers. Don’t pull your A game and have him crawling to you, just to find out that he is a conspiracy theorist, or he has a bad temper. Talk, scroll a bit his timeline, and find out if you want to be with him after all. Don’t say immediately yes, because he’s handsome or has some qualities you like. Investigate a bit, and see if he’s worthy of your effort.
So change what you can to be sexier and more physically alluring and appealing. Spend more time at the gym, eat healthier, learn how to apply makeup to enhance your best features, train your voice to be pleasant and seductive (tape recording yourself works wonders), master attractive body language and facial expressions, dress to flatter your figure, you get the point.  And that which you can’t change… own it.
This may be the best advice. Be happy. Don’t put on a façade. Be happy because you deserve happiness. Have you always wanted to travel to Paris? Book that flight! Have you desired a new career? Go back to school. Want to learn a new talent? Sign up for that painting class. Whatever it is that will make you a happier, healthier you, do it! If your ex sees you living out your dreams, he may miss you and come back. If he doesn’t, one day you will realize you don’t care. Guys really do like happy girls the most because they want to feel good when they're around you. If you're constantly full of drama when he’s around he’s going to start associating feeling bad with being around you and this is going to end things rather quickly. When you’re happy around him he’ll also be more inclined to reach out to you the next time he’s having a bad day.
This is a helpful article. I was the dumpee and it’s been 3 months now and I gone through a relapse phase but now decided that I’m going off social media completely. A week ago my ex logged into my social media accounts, does this have any meaning? I’m not wanting to rekindle this relationship I just want to know he’s suffering as much as me by doing that?
Even partners who love each other can be a mismatch, sexually. Mary Jo Fay, author of Please Dear, Not Tonight, says a lack of sexual self-awareness and education worsens these problems. But having sex is one of the last things you should give up, Fay says. "Sex," she says, "brings us closer together, releases hormones that help our bodies both physically and mentally, and keeps the chemistry of a healthy couple healthy."

Love your blog!! My boyfriend and I recently broke up after our vegas trip which we took for new years everything was so amazing up until the day before we left… then all hell broke loose he told me once we get home to go grab all my stuff from his house never contact him ever again to just leave him alone because he wants to start the new year single and just focus on him self…we’ve had many break ups before but I know deep down he has a very soft heart and has a super soft spot for me only knowing this because I was the only women who ever took so much care of him and gave him so much attention and love and spoiled him…first!! When we landed he was happy the same day we landed was my birthday…and I had got and huge cold within the 2 day time frame so once we landed I drove him home and no everything was fine laughing talking normal when I dropped him off he came to my window and kissed my hand and said feel better and walked away….so I drove off went home….the next day I was super sick with a cold still he came over with a bag of my stuff…an box of tissues….and a birthday cake which made me cry then sang me happy birthday by my bed and let me blow out the candles…we shared a peice and then he went home but just before he left i said i have the body wash and conditioner you can take it home and he replied but your never coming over again you keep it…couple days later I wasn’t feeling the greatest almost fainted in the shower so i called him and asked him to take me to emergency he did….everything was okay at the hospital in was told when in got my room to remove everything but panties and wear the gown….so I did and asked him to tie the back of the gown for me when he stood up I was turned so he stood behind me and I felt that he had a hard on so if started to laugh….after the whole hospital situation I thought we were okay….so I started asking him on the way home why can’t we be together after skinny focus together and things escalated and when I left the car we were in a huge fight he told me don’t call me text me leave me alone for good I don’t need drama or stress that’s afterskingndll you are….so I’d left it’s been a week almost since we talked and yesterday he sent me a msg asking how I was feeling and if i had been eating…so i replied felling much better and I eat when I remember because of my job…. he said I still love you I said love you to and then at night he had called me so is picked up he said is miss you do you miss me? I said yeah kept it very neutral today he called me but is didn’t answer so is sent him a text saying call u in 45 getting a facial done he replied it’s ok I just had a question…so I replied what’s up he never answered so when I was done I tried calling back twice he never answered so I sent a msg and said can’t answer now? ? So later on I had fell asleep and woke up around 8 with a horrible bad dream so ih sent him a text because that’s what I always used to do or call him….and said had a bad dream thought id text you don’t mind this msg….he replied maybe 10 minutes after saying it’s ok I love you….so I replied love you to…then he replied 10 minutes later saying miss me? And that’s when I stopped msging him…is did want to give him the satisfaction of saying yes I do….so he sent another msg saying ok….then another after saying….want to come over tonight chill and watch a movie? As bad as I wanted to say yes I didn’t. …and now I need help in want him back but he’s so rude and mean sometimes…. when he gets into his moods….but I love him when he’s not in any bad moods and he can be the most amazing person ever!!! What do I do!!! Please help!!


You know, I could've titled this "Three Signs You Still Love Your Ex." Because love and hate are each an emotion that is very close to the other, if you think about it. I want to go over this today with all of you because there are a lot of you out there that have a lot of anger toward the ex in your life, and for some of you it's affecting a lot of different levels of your life. Read more →


Everyone enjoys a good mystery, and your special guy isn’t immune to that. If you want him to miss you, keep secrets to yourself. While there’s much to be said about being completely upfront, if your goal is making a man miss you, this isn’t the plan to follow. You don’t have to share your life story in one sitting. Guys like a little mystery and don’t want to know everything about you right away. In fact, that’s how a lot of them lose interest in what could have been a potential love connection. And it never hurts to surprise him with spontaneity. Invite him to do something unexpected. Ditch the dinner and movie and try an outdoor adventure. Guys stray when they’re bored so keep him on his toes and interested. If you’re fun to be around he’s going to want to be around you more and will definitely miss you when you’re not around.
How to Give Someone Space Without Losing Them (Or Losing Your Mind) Here’s Why When He Pulls Away You Should Give Him Space The Real Reasons Men Don’t Text Back: The Ultimate “Do’s and Don’ts” Guide To Texting Here’s Exactly What To Do When He Says He Needs Space How to Make Him Miss You: 5 Ways to Have a Man Missing You Like Crazy He Says He Misses Me: What Does It Mean When He Says He Misses You?
I see some interesting points here re men withdrawing from relationship at times. It’s what we do. On occasion we need “me” time for simple reason we just do. Too many women see this as rejection when, in reality, we are just doing or evaluating our situation and who we are with. All perfectly normal behaviour. We will surprise you, if you let us. We also desire our mates time together so we can bond. It’s what Men do. I believe in any relationship both parties should be with their friends only not as a couple. It makes the relationship stronger. For sure Men as a collective WILL look at other Women and comment on them. Again it’s what we do. If any partner says he doesn’t do this then he is a liar. Looking is fine. Touching isn’t. Please avoid planning “our” week without checking with me first otherwise resentment will present itself. I see some comments on “he is in the Doghouse” and I’ve brought my boys up to respect women blah blah blah. All very well and nice in right context but reading between lines I sense control and “I’m the Boss” in the relationship. Dangerous ground. He will suffer it in silence but over time he will resent you for it a very fine line to balance on. In short men expect Women to be soul mates but there are simple things too he will appreciate.
Hi I was engaged to my fiance for 11 years and things were going great until last July when he left me. In September I heard that he was seeing another woman that devastated me they split up in November, in December just before Xmas he contact me saying that he missed me and wanted to work things out, 2 weeks later he went cold on me yet again I was left heartbroken. Towards the end of January he turned up on my doorstep and asked if he could talk about getting back together; this time he took me out on dates and said that we would take things slowly I agreed. It is now the middle of February and he said to me that he needs space a week later I messaged him to see if he was ok and he did not reply back for hours saying that he ok. I am stuck in limbo as he has gone cold again I don’t know what to do anymore?
Great article, so my situation started out last week with him pulling away, first day I was asking him what going on why so distant, and he explained he was stressed and they he didn’t want anything to change between us and regardless we would make it. Unfortunately the distant behavior never changed and I was giving him space, I was going to the doctor about a health issue and that when I let him know about it, his lack of concern for me and my health too me by suprise. I understand you need to handle your life but I would think a moment of empathy could succumb the moment of space needed (just a follow up text that he actually cared I wasn’t asking for the world) welp he just gave me a two answer text then I was I asked about his lack of empathy he apologies saying he did understand the message. So I broke off the realatiobshio bc I refused to be with someone who didn’t care and he had never responded to the message and it’s been five day. Please advise?

This is a no-brainer and it's no secret that both men and women are different, both physically and physiologically, but they're very different beyond just what the eyes can see. Those in the lab (scientists) generally tend to study four different areas when it comes to analyzing the differences between male and female brains, these include: activity, structure, chemistry and processing. This also includes differences in potential diseases that both sex's are more vulnerable to, however, also the differences in requirements when it comes to a satisfying love life.
See, here’s the thing. When you’re contemplating on how to get him to commit, know that forcing someone to do something they aren’t ready or willing to do doesn’t really work in real life. All you will get is exactly the opposite of what you wanted – him dumping your ass and running in the other direction. Forcing your opinions can make you seem clingy, dominating or too demanding. And you don’t want him to think you’re like that, do you? You can mention about commitment a few times and then just drop that topic. If he didn’t give you a clear cut response in the past, then he may not give you a clear cut response now.

Unfortunately, many women have had pretty bad and extremely memorable first date experiences with men who want to skip over all the get-know-you steps and go straight to bed. Women are on high-alert about this. Not only is it just plain wrong to think that every woman wants to sleep with you on the first date, it also tells a woman that a serious relationship isn’t what you’re after.


My so called boyfriend lived away from his home for 15 years. Since September he decided to come back home and create a new life here, which i get it’s not easy at all. Meanwhile we met 1 month ago and everything was going perfect we met every day and talked all the time when we weren’t together he even told me that I was helping him not to give up and get back where he used to live.

Even partners who love each other can be a mismatch, sexually. Mary Jo Fay, author of Please Dear, Not Tonight, says a lack of sexual self-awareness and education worsens these problems. But having sex is one of the last things you should give up, Fay says. "Sex," she says, "brings us closer together, releases hormones that help our bodies both physically and mentally, and keeps the chemistry of a healthy couple healthy."
No need to sign up at the homeless shelter only to impress them. Little things in your everyday life, from buying coffee for the woman in line behind you to walking your neighbor's dog, count too. Make an effort to do these things on a regular basis, but also make sure you're showing your selfless side when you're with them. When you're a kind and gracious person, people are more likely to want to be around you—both consciously and subconsciously.
Like the advice but now I feel the connection I thought I may have had has gone from me towards the 2 year boyfriend ( we live apart & I have 1 child still at home with me). Its fine he can have his past times of long fishing trips & he likes to control the pace of the relationship. My problem is that now I do not care enough about a relationship with him anymore, so does any one else have this problem?
Now you might be wondering, how can I fix this and undo the damage? The answer is the same as above, just pull back, give him space, and focus on yourself. Working overtime trying to undo the damage caused by acting needy is still you acting needy. It’s you being desperate for his approval and for his love and affection. Guys hate feeling that sort of pressure from a woman, the feeling that they need to be a certain way or she will get upset.
I hope this 'relationship guide for women' has been helpful for you to sort out your love life. Another point that I suggest here is to know and understand that to have a strong and healthy relationship, both the man and woman has to put in equal efforts. However, if you think that you are taking extra efforts to make your relationship work, without getting any help from your boyfriend or partner, it may be a red signal to end the relationship. All the best!
Im in the current situation right now… He wants space for me being paranoid for past few weeks.. I really dont know wat to do, he is so busy and stressed from work.. He asked for space, i ask him if he is breaking up with me he said no he just need time and space for the meantime… Need your advice please… I dont want us to be apart i really love him..
It’s also really important to take into consideration how often these things are happening, and how long it’s been going on. If you’ve dated for a year and he’s hardly every canceled a date, then all of a sudden over the course of one month he’s canceled on you three times, remember that this is one month out of many! Don’t erase those first 12 months in your mind as if they didn’t happen.
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My and I dated for two and a half months. Hi ex girlfriend of 7 years never stopped texting him. He just wouldn’t tell me. I was going through a lot with my two teenage kids at the time. But I helped him out a lot. We had some good times. His parents and friends love me. The ex girlfriend has put him out of her parents house several times. He and I would still have sex once in a while. He told me, he knows I love him, although am the one who told him lets breakup. The girlfriend takes his phone, to know if we’ve been in touch with each other. She would even text me saying he does not want me.


Some women think that changing their behavior and attitude for the man they love will ensure that he will never leave them. However, this is not always true and can actually be the main cause of the relationship breakup. Women believe that doing some unusual things will attract men towards them. But, this does not always work, hence it is important that women try to be themselves while in a relationship. In some cases, men seem to be controlling and want the woman to behave and dress the way they want to. Many women fall for this, just to impress their partners. However, this can be unhealthy in the long run and therefore women should understand that in no circumstances should they change themselves for a man. A person who loves a woman for what she is and accepts her with all her positive as well as negative traits, is the one who truly loves her.

But I guess I still like my ex, and I MISS him, while honestly I am more peaceful than when I WAS being with him, I do wanna be with him and marry him , he is a handsome, sweet, smart and successfully man. we already talked about marriage stuffs, we agreed we were both looking for life partner before we dated. And am also worried that he is actually annoyed by me saying breaking up so much and doesn’t wanna with him, and or he just wants the advantages of having a girlfriends, while we haven’t slept with each other…


I know that what this article writes it’s true. At the same time, do I really want a person with which I have to lie about my true feelings? I am very intense, passionate, and so talk a lot about what so feel and what ai think. I feel hurt of I am not in his priorities, if he never calls me or if he says he is not sure of what he wants. Of course it would be better for the lenght of the relationship stay quiet and wait. But would I feel really fullfilled and loved just tolerating?
Since the answer to the eternal puzzle of how to make a guy commit has been answered, what are you waiting for? Try our tips out on your date, your boyfriend or the eternal frat boy you just haven’t seemed to be able to convince to commit for a long time. Make sur ethat you are both on the same level and that you have not mistakenly misread any signs along the way. We’re almost sure he won’t resist your charm and he’ll be a changed man in no time. That works for us ladies, doesn’t it?
In addition to the pulling away he is very cruel when he drinks. Calling me horrible names and tries to make me feel beneath him. I know this is huge red flags but love makes us do crazy things. We’re both sexually open minded but he tells me I’m a liar about talking about having another woman intimately. I feel him and I aren’t ready for this. At least I’m not ready. It’s a unhealthy dysfunctional relationship and while he has his faults I know I push him to the limits. (Blowing up how phone etc)
Studies of long-term, committed couples show that there are almost always ups and down in the phases of a relationship. Starting out with a positive attitude and trying to negotiate differences are good ways to seek and maintain a relationship balance. From the research of Marcel Zentner of the University of Geneva, we learn that "Men and women who continue to maintain that their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other." Put another way, they are matched ideals. In addition, they are able to maintain positive illusions.3
Go out with friends and tell him about it. Start having nights out with your friends instead of date nights, and then tell your guy all about how much fun you had. He will probably be happy for you, but he’ll also be a bit jealous of how much fun you can have without him. If you spend a couple weekends having fun with friends, you’re guy will soon start to miss being the person that's having fun with you.
i have been dating this guy for almost six months now, we have not started having sex, because i told him i am not ready we have talked about it and he agreed. But of late i feel he is pulling away, sometimes he will not call or text me unless if i call him or text him first, he is always postponing our dates and its like he does not want to see me, when i ask him he says he is just busy with work or he could not call me because he had no credit in his phone, i don’t really know what to do? should i just leave him alone or i continue calling or texting him first all the time…, does it mean he has lost interest in me? please help ,
My guts tells me his friends made him see things negative about our future and distance. i said to step back just to say something but what i meant is to go back to positive and same as we were… i am not planning on contacting him. you are right about not bothering him and make him miss me and if he does he will contact me. but i know he will contact me eventually but i want us to be as before. btw he is an entrepreneur sort of has his own business too in Sweden.
I have been trying to go no contact for quite some time now but I fail every now and then. I have deleted him from Facebook, I have deleted his contact information, I have even deleted Facebook so that I wouldn’t be tempted but somehow I found ways to reach him. I miss him terribly and he told me he needed time and space to focus on himself and we would reassess in a few months. I refuse for this relationship to be over and I feel like I haven’t moved on a tiny bit since we broke up 6 months ago. I have decided to start working out, move apartments, plan a big trip… but somehow the only person I really want to share my stories with is him. I am flying through Vancouver (where he now lives) in August and I thought I would text him for a quick coffee at the airport. I hope he will want to see me, I really do. I need some sort of closure and if not, a way to reconnect.
am reading your discussion on how important it is to keep in touch after a long distance breakup…but it seems my boyfriend sometimes is interested in conversations and will write quite a lot, then sometimes he is one worded and/or doesn’t even reply anymore. He tells me he is here always when I need him and wishes me the best, etc, and numerous times he has asked me if we broke up if it’s possible for us to stay in contact and be friends and I said over time maybe, but that I don’t know, but now that we have broken up I miss him and it’s been one month. We are both from the same city and then we both moved to the east coast for college and stayed together a year and a half, but started falling into communication failures and distance. We have generally been very good at fixing our problems, but this summer we both were in the same city for two months, it was wonderful, then I left for a month to a different country and it started to happen again where we lost touch and communication became worse to the point where I would express my deep sadness and emotions about not being happy and all the things I felt were wrong in our relationship. He wanted to fix it and admitted he felt the same and wanted to rekindle the spark, but then the last week before I came he became distant again and then I got back and we talked, cried and broke up. We said let’s give each other a few days to think it through, but then we broke up. I regret losing him and I have followed all the steps and methods and in your videos. The ones about writing bullet points on what went wrong, his views, etc and I still feel lost, but I have come to terms with a lot of things I did wrong. He owed me money from a previous trip we went on and I was a bit rude about it and I feel it somewhat ruined the relationship after the break up, but then we started to slowly talk and I asked his opinion on something, he was kind, but stopped anwering. I’m not sure what else to do. I am now back in the city I study in and he is still home, but will be back soon, 3 hours away.
Long story short, if I had taken the advice of this article, he may have never cone back to me. When he was weak and kicking himself for messing up, he pulled back. Pulled back so far that he couldn’t see the potential that I did for us. I was able to be strong and fight for what I wanted, and show him that there are other kinds of women out there who won’t “hate him” for accidentally falling asleep and missing our date. I’ve shown him what true love is, and now that he sees he can be loved, he has given his full heart to me.
Being apart from someone you care about can be tough, especially if you two share a deep bond and you do many activities together. Not having your boyfriend around for a substantial period can seem like torture at times. However, instead of letting yourself be consumed by sadness, find a more positive mindset. It is important for you to accept that being apart from your boyfriend is healthy, you both need some time on your own. Wanting to have some time to yourself is not a bad thing and it is part of any healthy, long-term relationship.

Once you’ve rocked his world, don’t say, “OK, I rocked you, now pay me back with your lifelong commitment.” That won’t work. Show him that he must earn that privilege. And keep earning it. I’m not talking about berating, withholding or any other mind-f*ck thing we all despise. (Not sure what I mean? Find out why “you go girl” thinking is the worst advice.)
Me and my boyfriend were together for about a year and promised each other the world to each other. Our connection was so strong and nothing stopped us from separating for a while especially since our families come from different cultures and religions. As time went by, we started having problems because of the family issue and he came to terms that it is risky to continue the relationship when we are unsure of the future. I have been doing no contact and it has been two weeks. He still had me on social media and everything. I even posted a few pictures of myself and sporting activities which I know he could see. Once I posted something about a concert that was near his place, he saw it and decided to unfollow me. He still has me on facebook, but I have no idea if that’ll last. He hasn’t reached out once to me since I started no contact. I don’t know what I should do.
This is one of the best comments I’ve read here Shirley. While I don’t think these articles are trying to blame us for the reason why men pull away. They do always seem to be like “oh he’ll come around”. Maybe in the land of unicorns and rainbows he will. In reality if the guy has made up his mind that they don’t want to be with you anymore no amount of space will make him change it. My ex ain’t coming back to me after his vanishing act. Was seeing him for a few months. Everything was fine until I didn’t want to have sex on the couch when he wanted me to after that I didn’t hear too much from him. Is he coming back to me? Probably not. Not unless he can’t find anything better. I wasn’t needy in that relationship. I only got pissed off when I hadn’t heard from him in a few weeks which I thought was a bit out of character. Then I tried to find out what was up and got zilch. His silence spoke pretty loudly.
I was with my ex for 8 months, he came on to me very quickly told me he loved me within 3 weeks (we would talk a lot, at his request) He called me all the time, texted me that he loved me like 10 times a day. Everything was good between us. He is a single father of a little girl, he has full custody of her so I know he was busy a lot that’s why I hardly called and waited for him to call me back. He would always call me back when he said he would and that made me feel secure because he was consistent. But in March I started getting a gut feeling something was wrong, he wasn’t calling me back like before, our nightly talks started diminishing and the last time we had sex it was bad. We only got to see each other on the weekends and would have our alone time every other week, so it bothered me. I asked him a couple of times if everything was ok and he would say yes but I felt him distant. One morning after not getting his 3:45am good morning text, I texted him to wake up and he replied oh sorry I forgot I was putting gas. My intuition was bugging me so bad , so I told him that I was not happy that he was changing and I didn’t know why. He said he knew we weren’t talking as much but that didn’t change his feelings for me but that he was “busy” all of a sudden he is to busy to talk to me. I knew right there that his feelings had changed for me. He told me to do whatever I wanted like if I was the only one in the relationship. So I broke it off over a text. How sad is that! I then text him later on in the day and told him that I didn’t like how things ended that we should talk and he replied “I’m sorry its not going to work out. I am not talking or seeing anyone, I apologized for everything I just need time for myself” We broke up April 6 and I’m still having a hard time. The last time I saw him I was upset at him we had an argument but he told me “I love you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’m not a little boy I know what I want and its you” A week later we brake up and he doesn’t want me. We were planning on moving in, in June and we were actively trying to conceive baby. I feel broken and its been hard to move on. He hasn’t reached out to me after all the love he claimed to have for me. I fell in love with him and here I am broken while he has moved on with his life posting away on his Instagram. He is private but I can tell he has been actively been posting pictures. Has anyone been through something like this? I saw the red flags but I chose to ignore them, he had only been single for 2 months he lied about it, the way he came on to me so quickly acting needy wanting to talk on the phone for hours, telling me he loved me within 3 weeks of meeting each other. I’m not sure but I have a feeling he is seeing someone else that’s why he didn’t give a sh*t about our relationship at the end.
Be mysterious and surprising. If you are a complete open book when you first meet a guy, it won’t leave him with anything to be surprised by. Instead, you should tell an interesting fact about yourself each time you get together. This will leave your guy wanting to hear more about you, and waiting to find out what new thing he'll learn next. Be spontaneous with him. If you usually go to dinner for dates, invite him on an adventure like rock climbing one day. This spontaneity will excite him and keep him guessing at what you’ll want to do next.
So it was never an official relationship. But we had been dating regularly for about a month. Quite a lot of phone/ text contact. The vibe was easy, flirty, and really quite open and emotional too. He was so comfortable with me. He shared so much of himself and his thoughts and his feelings. We both agreed that we would just take it slow and easy and see how things develop. Then one night I stayed over, and we had sex, but it was really awkward. Just before he got really upset with me and told me that he thought I was a tease and making him feel desperate and needy. I was just being playful and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to sleep with him that night. Actually I didnt really. But he got mad and told me that he thought I was playing games and somehow I panicked and slept with him. But it was not good. Anyway, I felt depressed the next day, and told him about it. (MISTAKE) which i redeemed later and after a few days things were ok again. But he wouldn’t call me as frquently and he stopped being warm when he did contact me. He used to call me princess and sweetheart. All that stopped. So I got nervous. He would call me once a week to say he was super busy and didn’t have time to meet (this is true because of his job) but I thought he was making excuses not to see me. And I kept asking him. And then I asked him one night and it turned into an argument that went on till 2am and the next day he sent me a text to say that it was his last text to me for a while and that we shoudl just be friends and get a peaceful closure on things. So I called and agreed and said yes, but I also reminded him that it wasn’t like we were a couple anyway, and that we were just friends anyway. And I mentioned that I might be moving away really soon ( i had a job interview which required me to relocate, incidentally I didnt get it,but at the time I hadnt told anyone) so he said that he didn’t know and he asked me twice to let him know how it went. That was three weeks ago and I havent’ been in touch. I didnt call him on his birthday, and i havent told him about my interview. But I miss him everyday. Im working on becoming my best self. BUt I really want to be close to him. I miss him. Do I have a chance, or has he lost the attraction for me?
Getting a man to miss you can be tiring, so make sure you have the patience for it. Also, remember, men love to chase you, so give him something to work for. And if that's not enough to get a guy to miss you, we recommend you read James Bauer's Respect Principle, his best-selling relationship guide basically hypnotizes men to fall and stay in love with you with 1, dead-simple tip.
Nothing would astonish him more than realizing that, after all these years of spending every weekend partying with him, you've decided on picking Angela and Susanna over him to go shopping and partying. Of course he wouldn't mind that, well I hope he's not the possessive kinds, but let me tell you, every guy, no matter how liberal and 'open' he is in a relationship, cannot do without missing you on a routine, if you disrupt it one fine day. There you dress up for the evening with your girls, and he's already missing you.
I broke up the day before valantine day he wasn’t affectionate and he pushed me away he was with his ex four years she cheated on him twice he met me six month into his break up we talked about me not beinga rebound got into a relationship then he was seeing his step daughters who wanted him to get back with his ex we were having problems because he was pulling away and he said he was still raw over his ex s of I said let’s have some space I was really raw I have gave him chances for him to go back I’d she who he wants inmin love with him and tempted to msg him as I haven’t heard from him it’s nearly a month we were together 6 months
Use body language to show you're listening. Don’t doodle, look at your watch, or pick at your nails. Nod so the other person knows you're getting the message, and rephrase if you need to. For instance, say, "What I hear you saying is that you feel as though you have more chores at home, even though we're both working." If you're right, the other can confirm. If what the other person really meant was, "Hey, you're a slob and you create more work for me by having to pick up after you," he or she can say so, but in a nicer way.
1. Take care of yourself first. When you meet a guy you feel like you want to spend every waking moment with, it’s an amazing feeling: an amazing feeling that you must counter with putting yourself first! Continue to do the things that make you happy, and make sure you keep dating other guys before you’re in an exclusive relationship. While this can be really difficult, it’s also a great way to remind yourself what it is you’re looking for in a man and that the new amazing guy really isn’t the only fish in the sea. If you’re finding yourself reserving all your free time for one guy, calling him, or breaking plans with friends the second he calls, take a breath. Put yourself first! If you aren’t in a serious, committed relationship with a man, you’re free to do the things you like when you like, for however long you like. That isn’t to say that once you’re in a relationship you stop doing things you like! It’s just that before you get there, be sure not to get too wrapped up in making someone your universe if you aren’t his. Meet his energy. It’s that simple.
Sometimes men pull away for the same reasons we do . Ex: they have a huge stress related pimple and because most men don’t wear makeup, they can’t hide it, and they are embarrassed. Just because men exhibit different behavior than we do ( all that “manly” conditioning) doesn’t mean they are so different than we are. Let’s stop talking about men and women like we are different species and we need to study each other. Neither men nor women have a collective mind. Let’s just treat each other as individuals and take every case into account. I met the nicest, sweetest guy a year ago. Doesn’t mean it’s all been perfect, but he’s an individual just like I am and this b.s. “guys do this” and “women do that” is just not helpful to anyone. I love my short, stocky, loudmouth best friend/ sometimes bf dearly. First, and foremost, hes my best friend, the best friend I have ever had, when he’s not being a pain in the ass. But he’s still my best friend, and I love him, I hope we will always be friends.

I was in a fwb relationship with a man that I’m compatible with. But his ex wife and ex gf of 14 years both cheated on him. He never wants to date or have a relationship again. He says he’s un loveable too. It breaks my heart because I’m very much in love with him. He brok up with me 2 years ago because he knew I was in love with him without saying. We hadn’t talked again til last week. We had wonderful exciting sex. He said he hadn’t been with anyone in a long time.
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