Thank you for your comment. So this is very common and it seems to me he is keeping you around but not a priority. You will not get a true commitment from a man if he does not see you as a priority. There could be a way of changing this and you should not give him your time when he asks for it moving forward. I encourage you to reach out to me here and book a 30 or 1HR coaching session so we can discuss how to change this moving forward. Hope to hear from you soon. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching-2/


If unfriending and blocking your ex from your social media accounts seems a little too harsh, you can still use your online profiles to make him miss you. Remember how we discussed how social media gives your followers a peek into your everyday life? Well, when it comes to making your ex miss you, and to successfully bring him back into your life, you will need to put your profiles into overdrive. Document everything, from the mundane to the extravagant. Every time he opens his social media apps, he should receive a new notification on how awesome your life is. Going to Starbucks for lunch? Snap a photo of your drink. Attending your BFF”s little cousin’s 1st birthday party? Post an Instagram video of yourself taking a swing at the piñata. The key is to make your life look as full, robust and as exciting as possible. If you’re doing anything other than siting at home nursing your broken heart, your ex will instinctively start to miss you. He will wonder how you moved on so fast, and he’ll be dying to get back together again.

Plan some sort of trip or vacation so you’re not at home being sad. Ten years ago, I went through a pretty rough breakup of a 2-year relationship. Rather than staying home and feeling sorry for myself, the first thing I did was book a trip to visit my brother in Washington DC. It was great because, while sure, he and I talked a little about the breakup, I was distracted just enjoying my bro time.
Hi my name is Tiffany. I have been with my man for over three years. The last year we fought a lot and I always found things such as him sexting other women and eventually I just broke down got depressed and felt like he was cheating on me when I didn’t know if he really was becuase he would tell me he wasn’t. I have a child with him and another on the way. We live together and he won’t break the lease. He broke up with me saying he was just tired of it and just knows how to get in my head to where I feel so hurt and upset and hate myself for doubting him when I even catch him in lies. Now I find myself still loving him and wanting him back so bad but I’m always hurt and sad becuase whenever this man does stuff that makes me happy then next he doesn’t realize how much he hurt me…im terrified he’s gunna see other woman and since I live with him and have his children it will kill me but he doesnt understand that. Since he broke up with me I have no right to say who he sees but it will make me feel like I was nothing to him! That I will feel like I’ve lost all hope of being with him. He says he loves me but not in love with me. He gives me kisses sometimes but then ttys to not give me the wrong idea. I need help and o know it’s all toxic but I don’t know what to do!! I hurt so much! With a one year old and a baby on the way I’m so emotion and can’t think. I love this man so much but I feel if he dates another woman he’s gone forever and I’ll be all alone with his children while we go back and forth for our kids to see me and him I two seperate households. And what if he fell in love with someone else and had kids with them? I’d die! I don’t know what to do…i want to be with him and I know he still does lovable things for me but I feel like it leads me on…and since we live together I can’t have no contact with him. And each time he hides his phone to text I feel like he’s already talking to other woman and just won’t tell me. Someone please help…
Ok so my relationship with my ex was amazing! eveverything was good! I’m 28 and he’s 41! we met at work and we just connected immediately! my mom died 8 months ago and ever since then we have had a strain and it’s been a little hard but he knows what I’m going through because his mom also passed 10 years ago! my ex has never been the commitment type but he was with me for 3 years! even he said I am the only girl he’s ever loved and actually cared about! But then he wanted this break with me but was still contacting me and seeing me 3 times a week atleast! But then he cheated! he strayed and he always said he would! but it was just out of no where! he still says he loves me and maybe one day we can be together but we just need space! but I don’t get it cuz he still wants to talk to me and make sure I’m doing good! this break up had been really hard on me especially since my mom just died and he was the only one there for me! please help me I don’t know how to take control of this break up! He’s holding all the cards right now and I hate it!

Before reading this article, if a guy pulled away I would have automatically assumed he was no longer interested, had met someone else or I’d done something to upset him. In addition, I most certainly wouldn’t have been happy to welcome him back with open arms. On the other hand, IF the need for space was communicated beforehand-though I’d still be wondering- then I’d have no problem with this at all.
    "'We' is a state of mind and heart. It means that wherever one partner is, the other is present in their thoughts. Partners who consider themselves a 'we' act that way. When you talk to partners who live with and in the heart of their beloved, you experience that commitment in every way they present themselves. They communicate a pride in belonging to their partner. It's a powerful feeling of 'us' over anyone or anything else.
Me and my girlfriend have been dating for quite a while now. We’re starting to get more distant by the day. Sometimes I feel like she’s mad at me but she’s the same as me; looks pissed but isn’t, I really love her but I feel like something is missing. What should I do? And I can’t really show much emotion since I’m still tramatized from my past self, I wasn’t allowed to show any emotions bc of my mom told me to. Its hard for me to express my feeling. Plz help.
So my boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me a month ago due to arguing. He is in the army and currently away. I made the mistake of begging for him to take me back, before asking if we could still talk and saying I would leave things. After 3 weeks he stops following me on Instagram and I’ve found out today he has deleted me from facebook. I don’t understand why he would wait to do these things, he also has stuff at my house that he needs to pick up when he’s back. I really want him back, our relationship was amazing when we were together, problems only arise when he’s away. Now though I’m convinced he’s talking to a girl he knew from school.
My boyfriend and I just broke up today…. At fjrst everything was going well. He found a job in the field he likes and all of a sudden he became anger and bitter towards for no reason. We were together for 10 months we have 9 month old twins together and we would fuss, fight, argue, stop speaking to each other within the relationship I love him with my whole heart. He completes me. We both didn’t want to be in a relationship but, we decided for the sake of the twins. We were just going to co parent. Now he acts as if I was a bad woman to him he made me feel like every problem we had I was the cause. He has a 13 yr old son with someone else and today he said she visited him at his place of employment. Why???? If you and her stopped loving each other and you couldn’t stand her yoy never wanted to be around her. So what changed. He only spoke to his son and only him…. All of a sudden today he thinks we should move on cause he can’t be the man I need or want him to be… It hurts but, I’m wondering were they talking behind my back or what??? He said that he rather be with her cause he deserves to be happy.. I’m extremely hurt… Pray for me.
When you first fall for a guy, it’s all about lust. A massive release of endorphins and dopamine, a chemical reaction, that makes you want each other more. By snuggling with your man, you can create that same intrinsic need that makes him want you and love you more. You will be programmed into his brain and that’s going to make him miss you and love you more. So snuggle up and make it happen!
Use social media to highlight the fun you’re having independently. Start to post pictures and status updates about how much fun you’re having doing things on your own. This works very well when trying to get an ex to miss you. Show how much you’re enjoying life on your own, and your guy will be begging to hang out with you because he misses you so much.
Lastly, until your guy finally comes to his senses and realizes that you’re the girl from him, don’t stop dating other men. Keep your options open even if you’re not particularly interested in these other guys. If you keep your social calendar full of dates with others, you will be less worried about what your guy is doing, and you won’t be so preoccupied with things moving from casual into a committed relationship.

Absolutely. Why would u even bother with somebody like that. Everybody needs space and that applies to women also but that doesnt mean that u have to distance urself from each other to an extreme where u feel unloved and insecure in the relationship and why should any woman accept that its ok for a man to do this. Imagine if the woman did it…….different story then.


Men want a partner who can laugh at herself and who has courage and strength. They want a woman who can see her part in relationship dynamics and own it. She has to be emotionally stable. Men want a woman who is developing herself personally, and who takes responsibility for her emotional experience. Women think men only want to have a good time. Women think men have no interest in developing and growing a relationship or developing and growing themselves. Women think men want women who are supermodels, and that they never consider whether a woman is emotionally mature, kind, supportive, or loving.

Get a guy to commit by being loved by everyone around him. Get on the good side of his parents and friends. This will give him a well needed nudge to make him realize that you are a keeper. Moreover, if they like you, they’ll always be positive around you and spread that positivity onto him as well. They too will give him that nudge. He will love you even more if he sees that the people he loves, are impressed by you. This is one of the greatest goals you need to achieve if you are trying to get him to commit to a relationship. A relationship is only fair and successful if both of your lives are intertwined and fit in like each piece of the puzzle. That’s why you need to take some time to get to know his family and friends, as this will lead you to get to know more about him, and we all know how relatives and friends love to reveal little tid bits from his bachelor life. And we love to hear those, don’t we?


When I was younger I always used to real men in and then cast them back out. So when I was with them I was fun, talked about them more than me and didn’t ever nag them but as soon as the day/night ended I wouldn’t call or text (or even really think about them) til they got back in touch. Men love women like that. Since having kids and now being single again it’s not quite so easy due to lack of spare time and me worrying that each person isn’t going to be good enough for the rest of my life, but after reading this I need to get back on track with my old ways. When I was in a relationship I was exactly the same and would never expect them to do boring things like shopping or visiting my mums house for dinner and I wouldn’t gatecrash their family events. I’d encourage them to go and see friends but they end up wanting to be with you more then .

So I met this guy about 3 weeks ago online and if was very much like the scenario you showed in your video. At least for the first week. I was then out of town for a week preparing to move my stuff to another state. He flew out to hel0 me drive the truck. However, since returning, it feels like he’s pulling away. I’m giving him the space, but I fear he won’t come back. Any suggestion?
The truth is that if you have lost your identity, then you will feel like your relationship, and your man, is the reason you are living. That’s going to scare the hell out of any man. You will have forgotten that you are your own person in life on your own path and, that no matter how scary it can be at times, you are the only one who you will be with every second of your life. It’s important to maintain your identity.
This article is surprisingly well written considering that most refer to manipulation of some sort. Yet, I would like to take a middle ground here in the positions taken by Eric Charles and Jennie. I think a fifth point, but moved to the top of the post should be on finding your own self love, and source of fulfillment independent of relationships, which helps you then do the second point say no to those who are not a good fit for you — i.e. know how to choose those compatible to you so that you can be yourself and also add value to his/her life. And yes, such relationships are reciprocal. It is not only the woman adding value, the man reciprocates as well. Both partners benefit. And commitment is a natural result, without having to manipulate the situation in any way. Thanks for offering different points of view.
Hello, gud evening thanks for ur advice. My ex told me he do not want the relationship again that i should go, later he said i should give him space, i cried and begged him for two weeks after calling and texting him with no reply, i called his mom and message some of his friends and brother to help me beg him. After calling his mom, she called him and talk to him then he got pissed off and said he doesn’t want again that i should go. Then i finally agree to let him be, but the truth is that i still miss him and i still call him and message him on facebook which he sometimes reply and sometime pick my call. After reading the step now, i want to know if i should stop calling him and texting him?
I met my BF six months ago. I thought things were going great. If he needs me to do things for him I do if I can. Usually because of our work schedules we only see each other on the weekends so I am not crowding him. We have never had a bad argument although he has made me mad before I get over things quickly. Then out of the blue he stopped calling and returning my calls. Was he hurt or dead? I drove to his house and knocked. No answer although his truck was there. I left a note but haven’t heard back. It’s been two weeks. I’m very hurt and confused. I feel like I could be okay with giving him space if he had said he needed space. At least then I wouldn’t have to speculate. I had told him I loved him and maybe he freaked out. But I believe if you feel it. Should say it because tomorrow is not promised and I don’t want to regret not saying it. FYI my BF is twice divorced. Maybe that’s why he’s freaked.

Understanding that you do not need a man in order to be the best version of yourself is crucial. Loving yourself and doing exactly what makes you happy is key, which means that you need to know how to be happy alone. When you have this type of mentality, you will be able to spot red flags instantly and become more admirable. If a man wants to be with you, he will make it known throughout the relationship. He will make it known in healthy ways of properly courting you. He’s not going to send you the late night 11 pm or 1 am text for you to come over and “watch a movie.”


My boyfriend for 4 months started calling and texting less as of the second week of January. It is true that he had some successive things happening one after the other which also prevented us for meeting since the new years eve. But despite that I let him know that I wasn’t happy with his careless behaviour. By the third week of January the date of his thesis submission approached and it just got worse. As I got bady ill for 4 days and he didn’t even get briefed because he did not ask how I was although he kept the conversation, I exploded on him and told him aaaalll I felt and went through and how he was absent when I needed him. My message just stayed unread on purpose till the morning and he tried to start a new normal conversation as usual like nothing happened. I was pissed off so I answered short, late, and tough. He stopped talking and by the time I cooled down he was already shut off. I ended up keeping the conversation somehow as he stopped initiating. By the following weekend I was near his area and we were talking so I asked if he feels like going out having some air. He made an excuse and I just headed home. We talked less and less through the following week, by thursday night we had a light chat and I asked how he was, he said that he was very tired and unhappy. As I asked why, is it going bad at work, my message just stayed unread till the morning. It was Friday 9 Feb. And he was quite responsive through the day, so I asked to meet and as he kept making excuses related to work, I just pushed more. So he just stopped responding to my messages and calls. Yes I know I did aaaall kinds of the things to avoid in these situations but I could not help but to see and understand what was happening to him that he had to express his unhappiness. After this incident I just disappeared too until valentine’s day at around 10 pm. I sent a brief apology message for my harsh words and putting the blame on him (when I exploded on him) while he was already having a hard time by himself. I wished him good luck with his upcoming thesis presentation (16 Feb) and wished him that he would never tell anybody again that he is tired and unhappy as he said to me the week before. I got an answer for this message that I was a wonderful girl and very understanding and I have nothing to apologise for and thanks for the good wishes and that I deserve the best and he hopes I will find what I deserve.
If you must, flip through a couple of pictures quickly. Don't keep gazing at them, or else you could be lost in the heartbreaking sadness of not having your guy by your side. Take this same approach with the rest of your life, it is not healthy to constantly think about your man, you have to go out and live your life. If you find yourself daydreaming too much about your boyfriend, find something else to occupy your mind.

Clean and reorganize: If you've been putting off some big cleaning or reorganizing project, now is the time to do it. Your closet may be a total mess right now, but you'd be amazed at how that can change after a weekend of work. The same thing goes for any other project that you have been putting off, now that you have some alone time you're ready to invest some more time into accomplishing those tasks.
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This does not necessarily mean you are a boring person. It may just be that the two of you don’t have much in common and he’s noticed it sooner than you. There’s really not much you can do about that. If the two of you don’t have similar interests or you simply don’t jive, it’s probably best to stop the relationship before it gets any further. He could also become bored with you if the two of you tend to do the same things all the time, for instance: dinner date at the same restaurant every Wednesday, same conversations being repeated over and over again. If that is the case, try switching up your date ideas and finding new things to do and talk about with each other.
“Men are so used to being pursued when they’re trying to gain perspective that he’s going to be shocked you’re giving him the space he wants. He’ll realize that you’re different from most other women he’s dated, in a good way” – Good doesn’t begin to cover it. I would be ecstatic and incredulous that my partner is actually willing to let me do what I need to do to be myself, with no ulterior motive.
Don’t worry about him enjoying the free time with his friends. Of course, giving him space to enjoy is going to make you look confident and less clingy. He may seem to enjoy it, but eventually, your boyfriend will crave more time with you. So, the next time he tries to come up with excuses to hang out with his friends, let him go. If he wants to go on a boys’ trip, allow him. The more time he is away from you, the more he will realize what he’s missing. He might think his friends are important and deserves his time but he will soon learn that he can’t spend his lifetime with only them, he needs you.
One quick way to push a man away is by pressuring him- especially when it comes to tying the knot. If you keep mentioning marriage to him and he doesn’t bite or he’s made it very clear he’s not ready for marriage but you keep pressing the issue, you will certainly push him further and further away. Men don’t want to be pressured about marriage (or kids for that matter). They are the man. They want to be in charge. When they are ready to make a commitment like that, trust me- they will let you know. Until then, don’t pressure him into doing anything he clearly doesn’t want to do. You wouldn’t want HIM to treat YOU like that, right? So don’t do it to him. If you’re unsure about where he stands on the topic of marriage, try bringing it up in a light and conversational way. If he seems intrigued, feel free to mention it every now and then. However, if he completely changes the subject or seems totally disinterested, I suggest cutting that conversation completely.
I read your article and found it useful as this was my first serious relationship and he has decided to ended by ghosting (he did however tried to end it before and pleaded to give us a chance) after texting him concerned about why he is not answering and that was a week after me not contacting him he calls me ending it anws I pleaded for him to come by tmrw so we can talk I wasn’t sure he was going thru it and I ended up going through binge drinking to the extent he came by and saw me all drunk and vunrable he left shortly (I do not remember that much) and ended calling him once and texting him a huge message about admitting what we had was real
He broke u with me in july . He ignored me after I did alot lf begging etc. i started to feel better do my own thing and little by little he contacted me. But They are short answers from him. No saying he misses me. No inclination that he wants to work on us again. I stay nuetral in texts bc I don’t want to seem needy but am I giving the right impression ?
Hello Adam. Thanks for offering such an exciting post and video. You’ve HIT the nail on the head! From my experience, yes, men totally enjoy their SPACE and we should make sure they get it. Respect his space and have him respect yours. Confident women with a touch of mystery and charm will most likely excite men to pursue and return again and again. I enjoy spontaneity and time spent exclusively enjoying my own range of soothing pleasures. First enjoy loving yourself – having a massage, facial, pedicure, and or just spending time at favorite events with other special friends and family. SPACE can make the relationship exciting!

For some the search can be long and difficult, and for others it can be quick and easy. A lot of variables go into the length, ease, and success of that search, but the one thing that will boost your efforts is how well you present yourself. It’s imperative, especially early on, that you look your best every time we see you, at least for the first few months of the relationship. This is not men being vain or superficial. Unless your father is Bill Gates, how you look is the strongest magnet you possess. Your hair must be done, your nails neatly painted, and your clothes should highlight your assets and hide your liabilities. Loose sweats, uncombed hair pulled back under a baseball cap, and rundown Ugg boots are fine once the relationship is in high gear, but definitely a turn-off when at the beginning. In our minds, if you are not making the effort to look your best when we barely know each other, we dread the thought of what you’ll look like a couple of months into the relationship.
Thanks for your comment. The only thing I would “call out” about this is when you say if they want you no matter the circumstances, you know it. The reason being is because he has proven it to you over time. He is not in a vulnerable state and also going through a lot. Typically a man under financial stress and job stress takes a significant toll on his ego and self-dignity. It’s a different stress. Losing someone you welcome support because he had no control over it. Now, the other stuff he possibly did and is having a significant amount of guilt. What I would suggest is that you step back a bit and let him reach out when he is ready. I do believe checking in with him from time to time is good and not let your ego get the best of you. Be positive in your time and conversations with him right now. Do not input any additional stress and let things progress naturally. Show him that you will support him even if that’s giving him some time to breathe. You will find out the answer. I would encourage you to also book a session with me here so I can give you exact tailored advice for your situation. https://www.apolloniaponti.com/private-coaching-2/
The truth is that if you want your membership in this club to be temporary, it requires that you don’t just “wait it out,” hope it changes, or avoid the topic. To get started, make sure you feel pretty darn certain that he feels the same way about being in a relationship with you. If you feel like you can’t wait for him to bring it up first, here are some Dating with Dignity moves you can make right now into the land of committed relationships. Read on to learn how to get him to commit!
An additional tip for women in relationships is to be open-minded. Many women are so set in their ways that they don't want to compromise anything in a relationship. And while being strong is an important quality, it's also important to have the ability to grow and try new things. Looking at your partner as a teammate and confidant can help you understand that you're both in the relationship, and you both have to be willing to bend and see each other's perspective.

When you miss someone, it is hard not to reach out to that person. You want to be in daily communication, sometimes hourly. But if you want a man to really miss you, you must pull away. Do not call him or text him. If you continually reach out, he will never have anyone to miss. You must give this special person a reason to miss you. When you do stop contacting him, Mr. Right will wonder just why it is you’ve suddenly gone silent on him. Rule one is to cut off contact. This is a super hard task for us girls because we like to be in constant communication with the people we care about. Guys are so much better at not reaching out because they’re not that great at communicating but for us girls this isn’t the case. However, if you want to make him miss you you’ll have to master this art!
Mr. Right will contact you. After making him wait, you can engage him in a conversation. But remember you must always be the first one to end the contact. Make sure you’re the one to hang up the phone or the one who sends the goodbye or good night text. The goal is to keep him wanting more. If you play hard to get, his desire for you will grow, and he won’t be able to get you off his mind. You’ll have him aching for you more and more. This is especially hard because when he’s being responsive you want to keep the conversation going but it’s really best to stay strong and end the conversation. He’ll be more willing to connect with you again shortly and you’ll have another chance at getting to know him. If you end the conversation first he’s also more likely be the one reaching out to you next.
Great article . Men deal with emotions differently , they also truly want to be in charge and for this they need to withdraw in order to think . For women its an opportunity to cool down and figure what they truly need from their men . And when he comes back be busy , be sweet ,understanding . Men dont change their mind that easily , the live they have for their women dont fade . Keep calm
My bf and I broke up like almost two weeks now, we’ve been dating for 2 years and half, he kept saying he doesn’t know what he wants, but he knows he still love and care for me, but recently was just really hard for both of us, we constantly fight over something, but then I found out after he broke up with me he’s talking to this girl who works in a same company as we do, he loved me so much I know that, we have lots of memories we shared, wonderful memories, he told me he loves me more than anyone else in his life, like he do really love me but he doesn’t know what he wants anymore, so we decided to break up. Now I have the feeling he is already dating this girl it’s so sad , I’m super hurt. At work I still see him kept looking at me but I dunno why I cannot see any emotions from him that he still wants me back? Is he in a rebound relationship? Do you think he’ll come back to me after I do the NCR? He said he wanted his feelings back , that feelings when we were still new , like feelings that he craves for me everyday. After I told him I’m not gonna contact him anymore he didn’t even try to contact me, so I am left confused. Does he still loves me? I unfriended him in every social media I have , it hurts to think he suddenly move on and talk to someone super quick while I’m here stressing myself out for over thinking
Thanks, and I am happy you enjoy the articles. It seems as though you gave him too much early on. I know right now it hurts but what I would suggest you do is focus on you and what makes you happy. Push away a little bit because he has to feel as though he is losing you too. Slow the pace of things when he reaches back out and don’t come off too eager for a relationship. The one thing I have to mention here is if he is not ready for a relationship with you then you cannot force this. The best thing you can do is take a step back and let him pursue you.
If you are obsessed with reaching some sort of a milestone, if you have an agenda and aren’t able to be present and enjoy the moment with him,  he is going to put his guard up towards you. He is going to feel like you are not actually with him and that you are trying to manipulate him in order to get what you want. People intuitively … (continued – Click to keep reading Ask a Guy: How Do I Get Him to Commit?)
Let things progress naturally and look at the evidence: Do they try to see you whenever they're free? Do they seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? Does they have as much fun on dates as you do? These are likely signs they're in it for real, so enjoy being with them and relax about making things "official." "People who are wary of commitment want to feel like they're the one choosing to be with you—they don't want to feel like they're being coaxed into a cage," Trespicio adds.
High levels of stress can do many things including destroy relationships.  If the stress of commitment is getting to him you may find him pulling away until it clears.  If you chase after him in you could find the result is that you have pushed him clear out of your life.  Give him space and time to think.  Be available but create that mystique that found him seeking you out in the first place. i.e Just be You
You know, I could've titled this "Three Signs You Still Love Your Ex." Because love and hate are each an emotion that is very close to the other, if you think about it. I want to go over this today with all of you because there are a lot of you out there that have a lot of anger toward the ex in your life, and for some of you it's affecting a lot of different levels of your life. Read more →
Hello,I broke up with my boyfriend year ago ,we were together for 5 years ..I broke up with him …he was not calling he has done it once or twice n once on WhatsApp ! Last month he got married !! I don’t know how to make him miss me again I love him n I know he loves me back !! Any chance hell come back again ? I’m dying crying out my heart for him ! But i sent him only one statement after seeing his marriage photo on Facebook n he replied ! Since then I decided not to talk to him again (the no contact rule ) what else should I do ?
Do you have a source or study for this statistic? Anecdoctal evidence or observations shouldn't be cited as evidence by a psychology publication. I'm a nursing student and I've visited a nursing home. I found the proportion of male to female residents roughly equal. Perhaps, there are more women, because women live on average six to eight years longer than men. In addition, older men have a higher suicide rate. These factors could explain the higher numbers of women in some nursing homes. I find this statement sexist, and offensive to MEN. I believe that men have emotions and are capable of love and attachment, just like women. I also believe that most men have integrity, and strength of character. This is the exact sort of thing that encourages stereotype, hostiity between the genders, and anti-male discrimination. The professor you quoted is obviously unscientific and a misogynist. You should be ashamed of yourself for quoting him. I will be writing a complaint to psychology today, and starting a petition about this. Thanks.
Want to know the quickest way to get your guy to commit? Hint about your ex popping back into your life, and watch your guy squirm! Even if you blocked your ex from your phone five years ago, you can still casually mention his name if you want to ruffle your guy’s feathers a bit. Simply tell him your ex has been emailing you and hinting at getting back together. Adding a little bit of competition to this dating game definitely won’t hurt!
Two months ago I met a man. We were so attracted to each other that it all happened so fast, on the first date. He warned me that he didn’t want a relationship… I did my best to listen to his feelings, show understanding and get some intimacy and we eventually got close and started meeting every week. I was sleeping over at his house, we were having good time, having sex, doing normal things like cooking and spending the whole weekend together. I knew he had a very problematic past – a father who never married his mother or took any responsibility, a brother from another mother who caused him problems, personal problems with drugs in the past and two broken relationships with 1) bulimic anorexic girl and 2) a girl who cheated on him 10 months ago. I was so good to listen, give him the peace he needed and be very patient with him.
Guys don’t know exactly what it is, but suddenly their instincts are telling them to get away. This usually occurs at the point where the woman could no longer keep the act up. Maybe she’s trying to appear cool and go-with-the-flow, but in her mind she’s already thinking of ways to turn a relationship that’s really nothing at this point into something. From that point forward, it’s not easygoing and natural, it’s her measuring if she is getting closer or further from her goal.

This is Dana I just want you to help with my issue. I met a guy I obsorved his character he is genuine, and kind to everyone. The thing is that he is making me to feel that he likes me but when I started to talk him as a friend, he just telling me tat he got crush on some one else & her age is 22 and few days after he Says tat he is loving a girl from the same premises and she is 24. I didn’t understand what he is trying to tell. My question for you is did he making to jealous or he just wants avoid me.
Same thing happened to me a few days ago. We have been on and off dating for 7 years and this last time, we were actually together for almost four solid years. He’s been having a tough time with work and we were having troubles with finances. I came home one day and he asked if I ever questioned our relationship. I knew it was coming, I googled “how to tell if your boyfriend is going to break up with you” just a few days before. I have not contacted him unless it was something about moving out (we were living together about 8 months and I’ve already moved back into my parent’s house) I have been obsessively scouring the web on ways to get your boyfriend back and it means a lot to me that other people are going through the same thing right now. If you ever need to talk, I am here.
Consider it a warning, but with this one, chances are, you'd put your own relationship into danger. But if you and your boyfriend love each other truly, and don't need to manifest it over and over again, this one works wonders. Tell him that you're enjoying every moment of your work/school/college. Tell him you've found a cool bunch of people who you hang around with. If you think it'll cause no harm, tell him there's a cute guy who has been checking you out quite frequently, all in good faith. If this doesn't make him jealous, I know not what does.
It's easy to let parts of yourself go when you meet someone you think is the partner of your dreams. But don't. "Trying to be someone you're not is so transparent," Kelman says. If you'd rather go to the gynecologist than watch football or hit an art museum, don't pretend to love the Steelers or understand abstract art just because the person you're seeing is a fan.
I met in 2007 in the United States, I’m in Canada we met at a concert and for me, as soon as I saw him I knew I loved him. We hit it off and within a few weeks I was going to the states to visit him, we started dating and I was so happy, but because of the distance and him not being able to cross the boarder to come up and see me( he tried once) due to felonies in the states, I wasn’t able to go every weekend. He started to go down a bad path and got into drugs, I was always there for him even tho I didn’t know the extent of what he was doing. I told him I loved him, and he freaked out, we drifted apart and I was hurt.
To be honest I don’t think he is scared to take the next step. I do think he likes you and has feelings for you but it seems to me that you are not setting boundaries and voicing your opinion and standards in this relationship so he will eventually take you for granted. I know this isn’t the answer you want to hear but I am here to give you the truth through years of experience. Right now, he has you when he wants you and he does not have anything pushing him to be with you. Some questions I would ask is why does it not bother you that he is touchy feely with other women? Becuase you don’t want to push him away? Or Don’t want to come off bossy, controlling, or needy? If so, then this will push a man away because he will take you for granted. Now, if you are open to open relationships then that’s ok too. Just trying to touch all bases here. But moving forward you need to know your good enough and not an option to this man. Go radio silent for 30 days! Also, challenge yourself to do some new activities to keep your mind busy. I know this will be hard but do this. 🙂 I invite you to reach out to me for a coaching session too if you would like so we can get some actions into play.
Answer: If he’s feeling low about himself, then the last thing you want to do is make him feel even worse by being upset all the time. The only thing you can do is to hang on, try to boost his confidence, and encourage him to follow this dreams. Being supportive will help him to feel accomplished and will let him know that you are happy with him and have all that you could need. [Read: 12 common male insecurities that women don’t realize]
same to me..I’ve broke up 2 years ago after 6 years been together. I was so sad that time but I dont want to look so pathetic. Even myself know how pathetic am I.Haha. Now I still love him secretly and I don’t know either the feeling will disappear one day or not.I want to do all this but thinking of he never care about her ex before me at all so must be he do the same to me.not care at all.I’ve secretly stalk him after breakup 2 years ago 2 times thats making me hurt like hell and i stop.Now I dont know where and how he is.
If you want this guy to be your boyfriend, you have to make him think that being in a relationship was all his idea. So remove all the pressure and stop stressing him out with your constant talks about being committed to each other. Soon enough, being with you will be the only thing on his mind, and he won’t even hesitant letting you know that he’s ready for a relationship.
I’ve been “hanging out” with this guy off and on for two years. Before meeting him I read books on this exact subject. I’ve been married and divorced twice so I wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing if I got involved with a man again. I’m very opened about my feels I always have been. I like that about myself but in the past I’ve also been pushy wanting things to happen right away. Now with this guy I’m “hanging out” with has pulled away a lot in the 2 yrs I’ve been seeing him, but he had always come back. I think it’s because I always gave him his space. Since being married and divorced twice taking things slow was fine with me. Just recently though, I couldn’t help myself and I told him that I loved him. I thought for sure he was going to pull away, but he didn’t not right away anyways. In fact, we talked about making it exclusive. I was so happy because it’s what I had been waiting patiently for two years for. Recently, we had a two year anniversary of when we met so being the person I am I gave him a card. I said a paragraph of very heartfelt things. I knew this would definitely make him pull away from me and I was right. Even though I know when it’s going to happen it still doesn’t make it easy to deal with. I love him and I want him to know this. I want him to know that I accept him for who he is. I feel the only way I’m going to get him to trust me is by letting him have his time away from me. When he comes back he’s different, for instance, he more loving sweeter. I believe him when he says he’s happy with me. He too has been in difficult relationships in the past that broke his heart. Love isn’t meant to go fast. Love takes time. I’m glad it’s going this way even though it’s hard because I came from abusive background and it’s why my marriages ended. This guy inspires me to grow and find myself. I’ve started back to school at 43 yrs old because of his encouragement. I don’t feel I have to be someone I’m not when I’m with him. I feel safe when I’m with him. I want him to feel the same when he’s with me. I feel that’s what true love is all about. I may love him but he’s not my whole world, he’s only part of it.
I hadn’t seen my boyfriend in 3 weeks. It seemed he was communicating less and less so I called him and he said he would call me back. He didn’t so the next morning I sent him a text stating it seemed like he wanted to break up so I would let him go. He wrote back that he didn’t want to break up, that his feelings hadn’t changed. That work had just been extremely stressful. He asked if we could get together to talk about it and suggested a day. I wrote him back in agreement I meet and talk. He never wrote back and wouldn’t answer my call. He ghosted me and after a month I unfriended and blocked him on Facebook. I miss him and I’m sure he’s missing me. Or was I played ? What should I do? LEt him go?

Furthermore, I want to mention something else that is aligned to this. I have seen several woman date a man and then come back and say “He was so into me in the beginning, he courted me and showered me with gifts, said all the right things, and was so eager to make me his.” But then once this man gets what he wants he moves on, and his actions start to change slowly. I call this type of man “the snake.” Men like this tend to be very narcissistic but also tend to get what they want often. They have a thrill of the chase, and they see a significant reward for their ego when they have won their prize. I always tell women to be VERY careful of a man who is too forward in the beginning. Take your time, and challenge someone who may be extremely forward. So many women fall for a man like this because we are hopeless romantics and you are pretty amazing! So, when you a see a man showing you so much affection and attention it starts to get you to think, “wow he is so different!” Right? Then you play this emotional mind game in your head stating “I would be stupid if I let this go.” I am going to explain further as you read on.


since 3 months we know each other..after a big conflict and feeling suffocated by me ..he has his own work related and family issues which I dint know earlier and I always kept him accusing n blaming for why is he ignoring me..but he has always been very polite inspite of my anger n anxiety..he needs space and told me he loves me and will call me back..just a second day

Fake it til you make it should never apply to a relaitonship. Building a relationship especially a commited relationship on a lie is never a good start. If the foundation is shaky, so will the entire relationshiop be. Do not try to use crafty tricks that will make him think twice and stay with you. This means using the age old pregnancy trick wont do. Just be yoursekf and see where that takes you. Maybe you might even be surprised by the outcome more than you had imagined.


It was the spellcaster! He called me three times using WhatsAppp. Somehow he tracked my phone number! Creepy much? He left voicemails asking me if I was ready to cast a spell to get my ex back. Needless to say, I was so freaked out, I made myself a pot of coffee and stayed up working on Heal Your Heart and Win Him Back so you ladies never ever have to call a spellcaster!
Exactly Why Men Pull Away And Then Come Back (And What To Do When He Does) How To Give Him Space So That He Misses You And Comes Back Here’s Why When He Pulls Away You Should Give Him Space The Real Reasons Men Pull Away When They Are Falling In Love How To Tell If He’s Testing You By Pulling Away From You Why Men Pull Away: 3 Easy Ways To Stop A Man From Withdrawing
Ok firstly all the hormone talk is true and your man goes through a 30 day cycle just like our 28 day cycle but opposite hormones. If your man is constantly pulling away not answering messages etc he is not finding himself he is rude, inconsiderate and needs to get his act together cause these ones head for divorce number 4 before the end of their lives. A man wanting time to himself is fine, go to the man cave but you have responsibilities here at home, don’t forget those or you’re in the doghouse. You pull away expect your woman to pull away right back, were not your Mummas be a man, a man never makes his woman Chase him. A man loves the Chase. Raise your son’s to have respect for women. Because going into their mancaves for days or weeks says these things: 1. You’re a control freak narcissist, 2. You have no love or respect or hmbleness in your heart, 3. Your woman is now available! ye! That’s right ladies say bye! You deserve better. Good luck.
Hey Adam I slept with a guy too soon and have been sleeping with him I don’t feel like he’s looking for anything serious cause he said he wants to take things slow after it all happened. I know he sees other women he told me he likes me an sees himself with me but not right now because he said he doesn’t think it will take much for us to get in a relationship so he wants to let more time pass he invited me to go on vacation with him I don’t know what any of this means really I tried to have an open talk with him about it by saying it’s okay tell me if you don’t want anything serious we can just end it now cause I don’t want to get hurt but he still claims he wants to be with me just not right away what do you think ? Should I run?
Let's start with a simple truth. Men don’t want to feel like they’re being hooked, especially in the beginning of a relationship. This has something to do with our innate desire for freedom and our need to feel like we’re in control. Not to say that we’re not open to the idea of settling down and being satisfied in a monogamous relationship with you, but the second we detect that these are your intentions, we either stop returning your phone calls or start figuring out ways to escape without hurting your feelings. Understanding the basics of how we think in this situation will go a long way toward producing the results that you desire. So don’t judge what follows as being politically incorrect or rude. Be warned that this is not about what’s right or wrong, respectful or disrespectful. This book is about one thing — the raw truth.
This is a helpful article. I was the dumpee and it’s been 3 months now and I gone through a relapse phase but now decided that I’m going off social media completely. A week ago my ex logged into my social media accounts, does this have any meaning? I’m not wanting to rekindle this relationship I just want to know he’s suffering as much as me by doing that?
So it was never an official relationship. But we had been dating regularly for about a month. Quite a lot of phone/ text contact. The vibe was easy, flirty, and really quite open and emotional too. He was so comfortable with me. He shared so much of himself and his thoughts and his feelings. We both agreed that we would just take it slow and easy and see how things develop. Then one night I stayed over, and we had sex, but it was really awkward. Just before he got really upset with me and told me that he thought I was a tease and making him feel desperate and needy. I was just being playful and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to sleep with him that night. Actually I didnt really. But he got mad and told me that he thought I was playing games and somehow I panicked and slept with him. But it was not good. Anyway, I felt depressed the next day, and told him about it. (MISTAKE) which i redeemed later and after a few days things were ok again. But he wouldn’t call me as frquently and he stopped being warm when he did contact me. He used to call me princess and sweetheart. All that stopped. So I got nervous. He would call me once a week to say he was super busy and didn’t have time to meet (this is true because of his job) but I thought he was making excuses not to see me. And I kept asking him. And then I asked him one night and it turned into an argument that went on till 2am and the next day he sent me a text to say that it was his last text to me for a while and that we shoudl just be friends and get a peaceful closure on things. So I called and agreed and said yes, but I also reminded him that it wasn’t like we were a couple anyway, and that we were just friends anyway. And I mentioned that I might be moving away really soon ( i had a job interview which required me to relocate, incidentally I didnt get it,but at the time I hadnt told anyone) so he said that he didn’t know and he asked me twice to let him know how it went. That was three weeks ago and I havent’ been in touch. I didnt call him on his birthday, and i havent told him about my interview. But I miss him everyday. Im working on becoming my best self. BUt I really want to be close to him. I miss him. Do I have a chance, or has he lost the attraction for me?
Mr. Right will contact you. After making him wait, you can engage him in a conversation. But remember you must always be the first one to end the contact. Make sure you’re the one to hang up the phone or the one who sends the goodbye or good night text. The goal is to keep him wanting more. If you play hard to get, his desire for you will grow, and he won’t be able to get you off his mind. You’ll have him aching for you more and more. This is especially hard because when he’s being responsive you want to keep the conversation going but it’s really best to stay strong and end the conversation. He’ll be more willing to connect with you again shortly and you’ll have another chance at getting to know him. If you end the conversation first he’s also more likely be the one reaching out to you next.
"Not all guys are outright about their interest, but there are certain signs you can definitely look for. If you've developed an inside joke, that's for sure a good thing. How polite is he being? Is he buying drinks? Offering his seat? Walking you home/to the train? Is he staying out way later than he should? Generally trying to make sure you're enjoying yourself? Is it super easy to convince him to get one more round when he has to wake up for work at seven? He might be miserable the next day...but he probably won't mind." Brady O.
It has been proven that people appreciate the things that they invest in. For example, you’re more likely to fall in love and take better care of an expensive handbag if it took you 12 months worth of savings to purchase it. But for the purse your cousin gifted you for your 21st birthday, it stays crammed in the back of your closet. You didn’t have to work very hard to obtain it, so it doesn’t hold the same type of sentimental value to you. The same principal applies to relationships. People care more when they put more effort into their relationships, so if you want your guy to commit, you have to get him to invest in you!
It sure is a beautiful feeling to finally find a man you think is perfect for you – loving, caring, sensitive, having a sense of humor and most importantly, respecting and accepting you for who you are. But unfortunately, he is not committing himself to an exclusive relationship with you, despite that there are very obvious signs he likes you. Or worse, he hasn’t given a clear response to your proposal to him, asking him to be your BF. Don’t fret. Asking a guy to commit takes time, and these tried and tested techniques will work wonders.
#2 He lacks the skills to effectively communicate. If there is something on his mind or something that is bothering him and he doesn’t know how to express it to you, then he might start to push you away. The biggest problem in this situation is that he’s often unaware himself of what is going on, how to explain it, or how to fix it. Lacking in the capacity to express his feelings or needs, a man often decides that the whole thing is too much trouble and will retreat instead of dealing with it.

I’m going through almost the same thing with an almost 2 year relationship.. We lived together for over a year and he is OCD and I’m a clutter/messy person.. I always would say our apartment was too small & couldn’t fit all of our stuff. He just would say that I had too much junk & didn’t clean good enough. :( Anyway we broke up over 10 days ago because he said I couldn’t change. So much stuff was happening with his family (parents moved to another state) and he could see/talk to them anymore. He became depressed, and withdrew emotionally from me. He barely even talked to me. I withdrew from him for a week before the breakup when his friend came over because he was also distant and it created tension between us. I went to my moms the weekend he took his friend home because they wanted boy time. I became clingy the day before he made me leave. I hope your situation worked itself out and you two are together or are working on things! Mine said that we were done for good, I’m not right for him even though he still loves me. I’m just waiting in limbo & silence for him to come back.
Men are always more attracted to women who seem successful, independent (in career and in personal interests) and who are “busier” than average. This immediately shows a man you can handle yourself and your own issues, and you don’t “need” him to save you. The fact that you’re busy all the time shows high value – he really has to try to get your attention!
I meet a guy couple months ago,he live in new york ,i live in Georgia.when we first meet we talk on the phone and text every day.now its like every other week if any,also his not calling me when his home.he’ll call me on his way to work or home.what should I do on his birthday I asked him for his address so I can mail him a card,and he said no cause,he doesn’t like woman to send him gifts on his birthday?
We're fully aware that both men and women can be problematic in a relationship, however, some may consider men to be more of a nuisance than women, if that's the case for you, and you're a woman seeking advice on your current dating situation, this relationship advice for women forum is a good place to start. Whether your man isn't pleasing you enough, he's causing problems or you think he's cheating, this is the best place to get some tips and guidance. If you're a male that's looking for advice, then we would suggest posting in our relationship advice for men board instead.

I was dating a married man off and on for 5 years. The last 2 years were very deep. He gave me a ring and made moves to divorce his wife. I pushed him away by causing a lot of fights because I didn’t trust he would divorce. He finally told her he wanted to separate but I was still afraid he wasn’t going to go through with it and I would be devastated. We had a big fight and it got ugly. I of course chased him and did all the wrong things trying to salvage it. He went back to his wife. I gave up 4 months after the fight and worked on me and understanding relationships. We haven’t spoken even though he tried calling me back in January once. After getting myself in a better place and taking care of me. I feel I really want to show him I grew and would like to reconnect. So I planned a little run in after these 5 more months since no contact. He talked but he doesn’t seem to have grown and is still very hurt. He is talking to my friends about me but everything is negative or he is trying to check my motives. He tells them I haven’t changed and I am crazy even though he talked nice to me, wished me a happy birthday and he admitted he has been watching me. I paged him cause I was upset he was talking to my friends and not me. I praised him about changing me and my relationships and told him all good things but I also told him that I felt hurt and hate it when he spoke to my friends and not me. I asked him to respect me and not talk to them about us. I asked him to talk to me when he was ready since he told me he wasn’t ready to talk yet. We haven’t spoken in a week and I find out he went to 2 of my friends to tell them I am crazy and haven’t changed. That I blew up his pager that week. I said all good stuff other then asking to not talk to my friends. It wasn’t a lot but it did take several pages since the pager doesn’t allow you to text much. What is he doing? I figure I leave him alone…if I see him just smile and love him so he can see the changes. But it is very hurtful that he didn’t respect my wishes. Is he testing me?
I was with my ex for 8 months, he came on to me very quickly told me he loved me within 3 weeks (we would talk a lot, at his request) He called me all the time, texted me that he loved me like 10 times a day. Everything was good between us. He is a single father of a little girl, he has full custody of her so I know he was busy a lot that’s why I hardly called and waited for him to call me back. He would always call me back when he said he would and that made me feel secure because he was consistent. But in March I started getting a gut feeling something was wrong, he wasn’t calling me back like before, our nightly talks started diminishing and the last time we had sex it was bad. We only got to see each other on the weekends and would have our alone time every other week, so it bothered me. I asked him a couple of times if everything was ok and he would say yes but I felt him distant. One morning after not getting his 3:45am good morning text, I texted him to wake up and he replied oh sorry I forgot I was putting gas. My intuition was bugging me so bad , so I told him that I was not happy that he was changing and I didn’t know why. He said he knew we weren’t talking as much but that didn’t change his feelings for me but that he was “busy” all of a sudden he is to busy to talk to me. I knew right there that his feelings had changed for me. He told me to do whatever I wanted like if I was the only one in the relationship. So I broke it off over a text. How sad is that! I then text him later on in the day and told him that I didn’t like how things ended that we should talk and he replied “I’m sorry its not going to work out. I am not talking or seeing anyone, I apologized for everything I just need time for myself” We broke up April 6 and I’m still having a hard time. The last time I saw him I was upset at him we had an argument but he told me “I love you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’m not a little boy I know what I want and its you” A week later we brake up and he doesn’t want me. We were planning on moving in, in June and we were actively trying to conceive baby. I feel broken and its been hard to move on. He hasn’t reached out to me after all the love he claimed to have for me. I fell in love with him and here I am broken while he has moved on with his life posting away on his Instagram. He is private but I can tell he has been actively been posting pictures. Has anyone been through something like this? I saw the red flags but I chose to ignore them, he had only been single for 2 months he lied about it, the way he came on to me so quickly acting needy wanting to talk on the phone for hours, telling me he loved me within 3 weeks of meeting each other. I’m not sure but I have a feeling he is seeing someone else that’s why he didn’t give a sh*t about our relationship at the end.

Plan, plan, plan. Fay suggests making an appointment, but not necessarily at night when everyone is tired. Maybe during the baby's Saturday afternoon nap or a "before-work quickie." Ask friends or family to take the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover. "When sex is on the calendar, it increases your anticipation," Fay says. Changing things up a bit can make sex more fun, too, she says. Why not have sex in the kitchen? Or by the fire? Or standing up in the hallway?
I'm not saying that men are right in pulling away, they also need to acknowledge the part they play in bringing out the worst side of a woman's fears. But just for your sake, for the sake of your mental and emotional health, just let go… anyway this is not the time to be having "talks" about the relationship because he'll most likely be unable (or unwilling) to have such deep convos during such a time.
I was in a friends with benifits relationship and after a couple of months i told him i loved him i knew he didnt feel that way for me but i was ok with it . We spent alot of time together alot of sex and got on a rutine i would stay over night one day a week and we did dinner and drinks watch games etc i thought things were great. Then he needed space blew me off for the weekend and now barly talks to me he is 54 and in am 47 at our age we know what we want but i do love him and just dont know what to do i tried to talk to him and he just says he needs space.. do you think he is not coming back? Do you think hes scared ? I dont know what to do
Hey.. I’m in love with this guy for almost 6 months now and we are in a long distance relationship..since from the day we met he treated me like I’m the only girl in the world he respect me like I’m around him always he calls me day and night.. And we hardly see each other because of his work and the distance between us.. Few days back I visited him where he stays and he introduced me to everyone around him and everything was good until I hold his phone while he was asleep.. I found out that his cheating for me which changed everything ..I’m a Moody person.. Then I asked him everything and he answered me some not everything.. Then he apologized about his doings and promise me that he will short everything out soon.. And I did forgiven him but sometimes i feel like I have done a wrong thing it will happen again and we are living miles apart so I’m afraid.. Please I need an advice on what to do!
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