Commitment problems can come from a wide range of places. Perhaps they had a relationship that was horrible and their ex cheated on them. This would obviously make them hesitant to commit to someone else. They may also have parent issues that explain their commitment issues. First, you need to figure out why they are that way so you can tailor your behavior to make them want to commit. [Read: 13 signs he wants a relationship but has commitment issues]
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Hi, my ex boyfriend and i work together, he is younger than me and we were friend for 2 years, I have been supporting him during his bad marriage. I have been liking him for a while and I confessed to him and told him that I can’t be his friend any more as I need to deal with my felling to him as this is wrong feelings because he is married. Latter he got separated from his wife and contacted me 2 weeks after the separation and we became together very quickly and very intense, he initiate every thing and we were very happy he told me how much he loves me and that he wanted to have a future with me. I gave him all the attention and care he needed to help with his separation. Then after that he start to change he started to disrespect me and became secretive than he dumped me because he is not ready for a relationship but he wanted us to remain friends. Our relationship lasted 2 and half months I was upset and tearful but I didn’t react he tried to say hurtful things to me to have a reaction still I didn’t react and I didn’t get hurtful to him with any words or actions and told him that I understand what he is going through and I am willing to go back to be friends, he was grateful for this and astonished that I didn’t react crazy of hurtful to him. Afterwards he contact me via text in almost weekly basis for the following 3 weeks after the breakup checking on me and try to open conversation, also appreciating me at the office to check that i am ok. I kept it short and simple as i need my time to heel as well as i felt he is playing games to keep me hooked in case he can’t find some one alse so he would have me as a short tearm back up. I stoped all contact a week ago and started to ignore him in the office as well and tried not to run into him but in a cool way so I only smile and say hi if we are in the same place briefly. He didn’t text me at all this week, I do want him back because i do love him but not sure that i have a chance or that he even really care. I am very cool, calm and smily in the office as allways which he can see which made him a bit uneasy and he tried to get my attention. I continued taking care of myself and having fun which he can see as well. Can you please advise if you can? Many thanks, Angie.
Wow! What a fantastic article! As I was reading through it, I was mentally ticking which of the qualities I already possess or things I’m already doing that are being mentioned in the article. I am very happy to say that in my current relationship, I’m either already doing all 4 things or one of them, I had already thought of doing that yesterday but have to wait until at least tonight to put it into motion. It’s only been 6 months and those have been fraught with obstacles, but so far, we seem to have survived all of them and I’m positive that we will survive the latest devastating thing that has come up just recently.
This does not necessarily mean you are a boring person. It may just be that the two of you don’t have much in common and he’s noticed it sooner than you. There’s really not much you can do about that. If the two of you don’t have similar interests or you simply don’t jive, it’s probably best to stop the relationship before it gets any further. He could also become bored with you if the two of you tend to do the same things all the time, for instance: dinner date at the same restaurant every Wednesday, same conversations being repeated over and over again. If that is the case, try switching up your date ideas and finding new things to do and talk about with each other.
Hello Adam. Thanks for offering such an exciting post and video. You’ve HIT the nail on the head! From my experience, yes, men totally enjoy their SPACE and we should make sure they get it. Respect his space and have him respect yours. Confident women with a touch of mystery and charm will most likely excite men to pursue and return again and again. I enjoy spontaneity and time spent exclusively enjoying my own range of soothing pleasures. First enjoy loving yourself – having a massage, facial, pedicure, and or just spending time at favorite events with other special friends and family. SPACE can make the relationship exciting!
Everything went well…we were soo deep in conversations…but the only thing we did was we dint confide each other that we were in love with each other….i was too afraid to….and he loves texting me often…and he says im damn cute in my photos…pulls my leg often…and we chat day and night…he says im his bestiee…all of a sudden he started replying me in one word texts like ohhh’s and hmm’s which drove me mad….i dunno wat conclusion to make…may be he has found me boring and too available….i love him soo much and it really hurts if he doesn’t chat with me as before….i went offline for a month…and going offline will make him miss me??? Will that make him crave for my presence!! Pls…help me somebody..im dying everyday

If you cannot control your feelings, then I would suggest for you not to maintain a relationship with this person. Furthermore, I always think it’s vital to any starting point in dating or a relationship to be clear about each other’s expectations. If you are looking for a relationship, then let the other person know early on! If not, then say so. There have been too many times that I’ve seen a woman dating a man for months on end, only to end up getting hurt because it became a purely physical “modern relationship” in which the man never truly committed. The two never set the expectations for a relationship, or the woman sat in silence out of fear of being pushed away, hoping he would come around.
Hello, gud evening thanks for ur advice. My ex told me he do not want the relationship again that i should go, later he said i should give him space, i cried and begged him for two weeks after calling and texting him with no reply, i called his mom and message some of his friends and brother to help me beg him. After calling his mom, she called him and talk to him then he got pissed off and said he doesn’t want again that i should go. Then i finally agree to let him be, but the truth is that i still miss him and i still call him and message him on facebook which he sometimes reply and sometime pick my call. After reading the step now, i want to know if i should stop calling him and texting him?

Hey there my ex broke up with me a 2 days ago and he said that he still wanted me in his life because he loved me but didn’t feel like there was anything there anymore. Now we had a little fight and he didn’t text me for two days and only texted me because I texted him. His response was that he wanted to break up and we talked about it in person and came to a conclusion together even though it was obvious I didn’t want to break up inket him go because that’s what he needed. We texted a bit before I went to hangout with some friends after we got done breaking up and I changed my relationship status to single but he hasn’t. He hasn’t even changed his profile pic of us? And I know he’s online all the time I can see it so what’s up does he just not care all that much about what it says am I over thinking it a little too much?
Advice from a male perspective anyone? I am dating a man who is 11 years older, I’m 26 and he is 37. He works out in the ocean and a lot of times we have minimal conversation via text/call. But when we are together everything is great and we get along very well. When he doesn’t have to wake in the wee ours or work out of town, he is with me every single weekend. We have been together six months and I have met all his close friends and friends kids. I have done well so far in respecting his space and he respects mine also. When he’s a weekend away with his guy friends, I am understanding and just ask him to contact me once when he is back in town so he feels he is not missing out on what he loves. However, this past weekend he had a sailboat race on the weekend which he let me know in advance and we made had plans for friday night. He reached out friday night saying that turns out he had to be at the venue in the wee hours so he would not be able to make our plans. I was emotionally unstable that weekend due to some work stress and family leaving so I needed him the most that friday. I did not think of my actions and instead of politely rescheduling for Monday, I blew him up – sent him various texts showing how I did not appreciate he canceled although it wasn’t his fault. I called numerous times in the weekend and texted many times while he was supposed to have time with his friends in the tournament. On Sunday I was so desperate that I passed by his house. His roommate was there and told me he hand’t come home yet. Since I blew him up friday, I have had no response to any of my texts nor has he answered any of my calls. I am very afraid that I scared him away and threatened his freedom. I also came out as desperate for going to his place. Today is Wednesday and I hadn’t reached out till Sunday. I sent him a very short/casual text today apologizing for taking out my stress on him and for not letting him have his space, to which I got no response. I am going to wait a few days and hopefully he will come around, as our relationship has matured and he’s told me how much he cares for me. Did I blow this up completely since it has been 4 days with no response?

So true! You can’t coerce someone to be with you. When a guy wants to be with you they just will. That is what happened with my current boyrfriend. We dated before and he didn’t want a commitment. We broke up and dated other people. We started talking again after many months of being apart, became friends for some time and began spending more time together. It naturally came together well and after time we verbally agreed that we were together and just wanted to be with each other. End of story. It’s very simple.
It’s pretty widely known that when a man is stressed, he retreats to his “man cave.” However, there is a big difference between knowing something and really understanding it. Most women have a hard time accepting that this is how men deal with issues because when we are having a difficult time, our first instinct is to talk about it and seek comfort from friends or loved ones.
Biologically and traditionally males chase females and females choose which male they want as a mate. So to be masculine you are supposed to chase, and to be feminine you are supposed to receive the chase (if you are interested in the male). If you personally do not like to chase women, that is your personal preference. But that is not the norm for males. Having said that, I don’t think it’s wrong if you prefer the female to chase you. But I do think it’s counter productive for you to pull away from a female for any of the reasons you have listed and then expect her to chase after you because of it, and if she doesn’t you lose interest. It sounds like you’re testing her when you put it that way, and no one likes those kind of games.
I watched the episode of The Big Bang Theory, where Amy wanted to strengthen Sheldon’s feelings toward her, so she made him his favorite meal, favorite strawberry shake, and played Super Mario music. Therefore, I wanted to try this and evoke my boyfriend’s childhood positive feelings so he could associate them with me. I prepared meatloaf with spinach, his favorite chocolate cake and we played his childhood video game. And this actually worked! Find out what he was most happy about during childhood, and surprise him.
My point is, this isn’t a trick you pull to “get” someone to commit and then stop. Because the day you stop is the day you give up. It’s the way you live your life together — can you think of a better way than to continue to impress and engage and deserve each other? I can’t. The key is to practice that NOW, not so you can stop doing it when you find someone, but so you can really start.
Another important thing to take into consideration is that he’s a man and he may be acting in ways you, as a woman, don’t intuitively understand. Your guy is not your girlfriend. Guys like to deal with one thing at a time. If he has a lot on his plate, he may take his attention temporarily away from the relationship. This doesn’t always mean he’s losing interest, it could just mean he’s overwhelmed.

Look at any of the popular and top women's magazine and you will find airbrushed picture perfect poses of dazzling divas on one page after another. Such flawless looks may not be possible in real life but you will make your boyfriend want you more if you manage to pull it off once in a while. Don't confuse this with being asked to put on kilos of makeup and displaying model like behavior all the time. Just give him a glimpse of what you too can transform into if you desired. Your sexy look will be engraved into his mind for a long, long time.
There’s a fine line between being your most charming self and getting lost in mind-games. One way to help distinguish which side of that line you’re on is whether or not you feel like you’re being yourself. If you find yourself resorting to methods that don’t feel true to you, that’s a red flag. Even if you do manage to snag the object of your affection, are you really going to want to keep up these tricks during the relationship?

Spending Saturday morning in the soup kitchen or helping an elderly person carry his groceries may help your partner see you in a more serious light. In a recent British study, people rated potential sexual partners to be more attractive for a long-term relationship if they had altruistic qualities. "Giving back to others shows your good heart and integrity, and although they may not consciously think that far in the future, partners are subconsciously assessing maternal traits in a woman to see what kind of mother she'd be," Kelman says. (Related: How to Use Social Media to Benefit Your Relationships)
In general, just find something to do and just keep yourself busy. Apart from being the most productive solution to your problem, this will help you catch up on stuff that you have been procrastinating about for a long time. We all have those projects and responsibilities we have been putting off for another day, and with your boyfriend gone, you have the time to finish what you've started.
Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit gettingrelationshipsright.com for more resources to help your relationships.
Your man has to realize that he can do fun stuff with you and not only with his friends. Therefore, go to a baseball game or basketball match. Just to be clear, you don’t need to shout, swear or drink a lot, you just need to have fun. Find great seats, buy two tickets and surprise him. If he likes hiking, find great tours; if he likes ComicCons, dress up as a Wonder Woman and go.
My boyfriend broke up with me early this month. He tells me he still loves me but felt like things weren’t feeling right anymore. He didn’t have this feeling for long he said, but he did feel it. We got in a fight one day and that’s when we broke up. He’s told me multiple times he does miss me, and begged me to come over when he was drunk because he just wanted to see me. We used to spend every night together when he was home from school, so I thought maybe we just spent too much time together doing the same boring thing everyday so he got tired of the relationship and not me? We’re not talking right now but idk what to do. We haven’t went a whole week in the past two years without talking to each other. Do you think he’ll miss me enough to want me back?
The last time I saw my boyfriend was 3 weeks ago. I understand that to some, it may not seem like that long, but to me, it feels like forever. Every time I get upset I always tell myself to go to my happy place only to realize my happy place is half an hour away and I have no way of getting there. I've made him happy when he was pissed and he's made me happy when I was sad. People say we're not good for each other, but who cares about what other people think. As long as I have him, I'm happy. Also, taking the time to write this actually made me feel a lot better. I'm still upset but I know things will get better.
This is a no-brainer and it's no secret that both men and women are different, both physically and physiologically, but they're very different beyond just what the eyes can see. Those in the lab (scientists) generally tend to study four different areas when it comes to analyzing the differences between male and female brains, these include: activity, structure, chemistry and processing. This also includes differences in potential diseases that both sex's are more vulnerable to, however, also the differences in requirements when it comes to a satisfying love life.
In some ways, mirroring includes – but is not restricted to – body language. If he places his elbows on the table to get closer to you, you can follow suit. Physically mimicking someone can increase your sexual tension as well as make you feel emotionally closer to the person. You could accidentally take this to an amusing level if you copy him too closely, so follow this advice with moderation.
So im a guy, and my gf of 2 years broke up with me. Im so in love with her that i would marry her if i could. Im 23, ahe is 21. The whole problem is that she is young and curious and i was her first everything…. now the hard part is that she wants to see how other people treat her, she met a giy at her job and they kissed and im broken up over it but i still love her all the same. We ended on really good terms and im happy she is just so honest with me. She has always been like that, she didnt want to hurt me in the relationship so she thought this was the best course. She loves me to death and she always tells me that she wishes she lived her life before she met me so we can be happy now. I believe her bc she has always told me this. Now its summer, school ended and she is going to mexico with her family for a whole month. I would love nothing more than to just be with her. Idk why but i have a this strong feeling we will get back together in the future. Ohhh and btw she said that i should live my life and not just wait around. She is so perfect and caring its hard to just let that go. Should i go the summer without talking with her? Everyone tells me to just leave her, but my heart and my mind knows what it wants. I wouldnt want another relationship or anything serious with anyone else unless it was with her. If you need any more info just ask. Thank you
Now, I’m bit bummed because I can’t seem to find any advice about the opposite situation: what if the guy is showing you more commitment than you can handle? Not in a creepy first-date-“let’s marry and have babies”, but in a solid 3-months-“I care about you and want to see where this is going, and I’d like to move in together and five it a try”. I want that too, just… not for another year or so (it’s actually a LD relationship, I put the details in a recent forum post called “Anxious about playing house”). Any advice? :)
Recently I was asked by a friend what relationship advice for women was actually essential. Honestly, dating and relationship advice is super easy to come by on the internet. I mean, I’ve personally written hundreds of articles about it, adding up to hundreds of thousands of words. And that’s just a drop in the ocean of other relationship advice out there.
End the conversation first. Start hanging up the phone or ending the text conversation before he does, especially if you’re usually the last to say goodbye. Being the first to end the conversation will leave him wanting more, and keep you on his mind until he talks to you again. This longing for more communication will start to drive him wild with his desire to talk to you.[3]
I was with my boyfriend for one year. The last two months we spend them fighting, I was really impatient with him and I didn’t behave my best while having a fight. He broke up with me and we said we would see each other in a month to talk things out. After one week I contacted him, he was nice, we just chatted for a day. After one week I contacted him again and I ask for us to meet, he agreed, we saw each other and I wrote him a letter saying sorry and saying all the things I was going to change. He said he couldn’t do it, we said goodbye and parted ways. The next day he came to my place and said he wanted to try again, so we did for a week. In that week he was distant, uninterested and mad all the time. One day he told me he didn’t want to speak with me and wanted space, I did the opposite so the next day after that he broke up with me again, saying he didn’t feel the same way and couldn’t do it anymore. This was two weeks ago and we haven’t talked since. I want to get back back together with him. What should I do? Please advise me!
In my situation, I’ve been seeing the same guy off and on for the past 2 years. We didn’t talk all summer. We started talking and seeing each other again the first week of September up until 4 days ago I guess. The last time I saw him, I had spent a night with him, I dressed in lacy lingerie, garters and nylons cause he loves that kind of thing, he kept telling me how gorgeous and beautiful I was. He kissed me passionately, and this is odd because he doesn’t kiss on the mouth ever. He told me he had so much fun, and it was a great night. I left and haven’t heard from him since and it’s been 4 days now. I’ve texted a couple times and haven’t gotten a response which is odd. We always have a lot of fun together, we get along great, the past 7 weeks have been the best in all of the 2 years we’ve known each other. After a very passionate, great night, he drops off the face of the earth. Any ideas what could be going on with him?
They tell us they aren't capable of being in a long-term, exclusive relationship. They tell us they think women are controlling and selfish and don't know how to stop feeling that way. And yet we bypass these statements. The words go in one ear and out the other. Or we remember them but refuse to believe them. We tell ourselves, "He's just wounded!" or "He's lying to protect himself."
A couple days later he’s still acting distant and he’s being short with me over text and I’ve tried asking him to come over but he’d say he has to clean his house or that he can’t then after goes to hang out with his friends knowing I asked him earlier if he could come over. And usually he would come hang out with me since we haven’t been hanging out instead of going out with his friends. I just feel after that that this is a sign that I need to let him have his space even though we haven’t hanged out in almost a week, I really hope this works because one of my girl friends said that he’s obsessed with me and that he said that I’m the ONE. He’s even thought of wedding ideas I mean c’mon he sounds like he’s head over heals for me right? and I just don’t see him going from loving me so much to distancing himself from me and not even wanting to see each other it seems. Maybe it was something I said to him over text to make him upset? I just don’t know but I will do anything to go back to the status of what our relationship was once before this all happened.
David Oragui is the CEO & Founder of The Balanced Life Academy, an organization that teaches important life skills for everlasting success in the 21st Century. He is also the lead practitioner and has taught over 160 people how to inject balance in every facet of their lives, from their physical and mental health, to their relationships, career and material wealth. Learn how we empower people to make positive changes in their life, through the life skills we teach.
Don’t fall in love with your man for his potential.  You want to bond with someone as they are now.  Sure, all signs point to him becoming successful and hard-working, but what if something occurs, like illness or disability, that would prevent that from happening?  Would you still love him?  Your man is not your project, so make sure you pick someone who you love just the way he is.
WOW! WOW! WOW! Guys, seriously this article should be preached (especially the fourteenth one haha). My boyfriend and I are together for two years now and he’s taking me to prom this year. So excited I’m gonna pass out!!! He’s a pretty tough guy and you gotta have patience with him, but he sure knows how to pull some romance tricks on me like flowers before school or my biggest addiction – chocolate. And now I can pay him back.
Many relationship experts swear by the No Contact rule when it comes to making an ex miss you, so it’s definitely worth giving it a shot! The rule is plain and simple: you cut off your ex for a certain amount of time, one to two months is the minimum. You send him a text message or an email letting him know you have a lot on your mind, and you’ll be reaching out to him when you’re ready. As soon as you fire off that message, all communication with your ex must cease. Even if he calls you back-to-back ten times in a row, and blows up your inbox with messages, you have to refrain from giving in and replying to him. The No Contact rule has a double purpose: it can either help you move on from the relationship, or it will make your ex miss you so much, he’ll be dying to get back together as soon as the no contact timeframe is over.

Its the same with me. I’m scared, we’re in the same college and we have mutual friends, i feel like if i dont talk to him, hell get used to his life without me. i want him to realize that he loves me and that he wants us to get back and be happy. its his birthday in a week, and i thought of giving him a sketch of both us and a love letter, because a letter telling him to give it another shot would probably annoy him, i dont know if i should go through with this or not. he said the breakup was because we kept fighting over the same issues. and honestly, if it was somebody else i wouldve let go, but i just know i love him and i feel like were meant to be. please help me out.
David Oragui is the CEO & Founder of The Balanced Life Academy, an organization that teaches important life skills for everlasting success in the 21st Century. He is also the lead practitioner and has taught over 160 people how to inject balance in every facet of their lives, from their physical and mental health, to their relationships, career and material wealth. Learn how we empower people to make positive changes in their life, through the life skills we teach.
Hard to tell what’s the difference between giving him space and receiving cold violence from him. But my opinion is if his not talking to you makes you feel very painful, then there’s no difference between giving him weeks or months of space. Relationships should be more about trying to make both sides happier rather than sad. Try to stay away from toxic people and relationships. Take care of yourself and people who you love and who love you. Go make friends and have fun! Relationship is a necessary for humans, romantic relationships may not. Good luck beautiful babes!
Trust me, your friends, your co-workers, your lab partner, your neighbor, and your barista at Starbucks are all sick and tired of hearing about this guy. And deep down inside, you’re probably a little bit tired of talking about him, too. When you focus so much of your attention on one person, you can slowly drive yourself insane. You’ll be constantly thinking about him, replaying your last conversation over and over again in your mind, wondering what he’s doing and who he’s doing it with, and wondering if he’s thinking about you at that exact moment. It’s not healthy, and it definitely won’t get you any closer to being in a relationship.
Fake it til you make it should never apply to a relaitonship. Building a relationship especially a commited relationship on a lie is never a good start. If the foundation is shaky, so will the entire relationshiop be. Do not try to use crafty tricks that will make him think twice and stay with you. This means using the age old pregnancy trick wont do. Just be yoursekf and see where that takes you. Maybe you might even be surprised by the outcome more than you had imagined.
I met a guy on a website some while ago, we met and it went great – was long distance. After a year, i didnt hear from him. Fast forward to last year September, i heard from him out of the blue, we chatted again for almost 2 months. We were to meet somewhere, but he didnt answer me back with a time. Was i being messed with? ( he ‘s very busy with his work, 1 kid at school). Should i just forget about him? 
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