When we first started seeing each other he had just gotten out of his relationship with his ex and I had trust issues that they weren’t really done. I would ask him about it and one time we got in a huge fight about it because I wanted proof that they were over. Now he uses that against me and he doesn’t like me drinking because his dad is an alcoholic. I told him I was going out with a friend gave him which friend location and everything I said I’m not drinking because I’m broke..I posted a Snapchat of two beers and he sees the Snapchat and just flips on me that I lied to him and said I wasn’t drinking but I did. I told him my friend bought the drinks but I’m sorry should have let him know. Anyways the fight turned bigger and he ended things. I told him I want to fix this because it was an honest mistake and he brings up that he’s gone through hoops to prove to me and all this. He said he’ll give it another try but isn’t ready to talk about it & just needs some space. I’m at a point do I give him his space and try to fix this or just move on.
Hey! Me and my boyfriend have been togheter for 2years now and the last month i was feeling that he stopped talking, drinking and working more. So i tried to talk to him for a week but he didnt really want to talk. So we talked about our realitionship and how i feel about him not calling me or texting me enough, compared to what i do to him. And he said that he knows that i deserve better and that he dont want to own anyone anyrhing. he said that he doesnt see a future with me, not with himself either, and the only thing he wants to do now is to work and be alone. Then we talked about our realitionship status, to remove it or not. We didnt agree on anything so the realitionship status is still there and i dont know how talk to him. I really want to try the no contact rule! But i could use some advice anyways
Great article . Men deal with emotions differently , they also truly want to be in charge and for this they need to withdraw in order to think . For women its an opportunity to cool down and figure what they truly need from their men . And when he comes back be busy , be sweet ,understanding . Men dont change their mind that easily , the live they have for their women dont fade . Keep calm
Great article . Men deal with emotions differently , they also truly want to be in charge and for this they need to withdraw in order to think . For women its an opportunity to cool down and figure what they truly need from their men . And when he comes back be busy , be sweet ,understanding . Men dont change their mind that easily , the live they have for their women dont fade . Keep calm
A goddess "lives confidence." She may not feel authentically confident but she is smart enough to witness her emotions as they are pop up, recognizing when her insecurities are causing her to take a man's behavior personally. She knows when to feel whatever painful stuff comes up inside her and then does exactly what a confident woman would do — not let his behavior define her self-worth!
i miss him so much that i dont want to cry so i always keep it in were both in high school but he lives in spain while i live in england i just came back from my holiday there for a month and it felt only a week time goes by so fast whenever im happy it hurts so much especially when others say "your both young so dont be stressed about that do your studies first" i get that kind of point but love is an incredible feeling if you are inlove theres no stopping it
Biologically and traditionally males chase females and females choose which male they want as a mate. So to be masculine you are supposed to chase, and to be feminine you are supposed to receive the chase (if you are interested in the male). If you personally do not like to chase women, that is your personal preference. But that is not the norm for males. Having said that, I don’t think it’s wrong if you prefer the female to chase you. But I do think it’s counter productive for you to pull away from a female for any of the reasons you have listed and then expect her to chase after you because of it, and if she doesn’t you lose interest. It sounds like you’re testing her when you put it that way, and no one likes those kind of games.
Trust me, your friends, your co-workers, your lab partner, your neighbor, and your barista at Starbucks are all sick and tired of hearing about this guy. And deep down inside, you’re probably a little bit tired of talking about him, too. When you focus so much of your attention on one person, you can slowly drive yourself insane. You’ll be constantly thinking about him, replaying your last conversation over and over again in your mind, wondering what he’s doing and who he’s doing it with, and wondering if he’s thinking about you at that exact moment. It’s not healthy, and it definitely won’t get you any closer to being in a relationship.
Relationships are a lot of hard work- there’s no doubt about that. And if your man lacks the basic skills necessary to hold and flourish a meaning relationship, he will more than likely pull away at a moments notice. This might be out of fear of not knowing what to do or doing the wrong thing, immaturity, or simply not knowing what to do from lack of experience with relationships. Whatever the cause, the relationship is bound for failure unless he has basic relationship skills.
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I was dating a married man off and on for 5 years. The last 2 years were very deep. He gave me a ring and made moves to divorce his wife. I pushed him away by causing a lot of fights because I didn’t trust he would divorce. He finally told her he wanted to separate but I was still afraid he wasn’t going to go through with it and I would be devastated. We had a big fight and it got ugly. I of course chased him and did all the wrong things trying to salvage it. He went back to his wife. I gave up 4 months after the fight and worked on me and understanding relationships. We haven’t spoken even though he tried calling me back in January once. After getting myself in a better place and taking care of me. I feel I really want to show him I grew and would like to reconnect. So I planned a little run in after these 5 more months since no contact. He talked but he doesn’t seem to have grown and is still very hurt. He is talking to my friends about me but everything is negative or he is trying to check my motives. He tells them I haven’t changed and I am crazy even though he talked nice to me, wished me a happy birthday and he admitted he has been watching me. I paged him cause I was upset he was talking to my friends and not me. I praised him about changing me and my relationships and told him all good things but I also told him that I felt hurt and hate it when he spoke to my friends and not me. I asked him to respect me and not talk to them about us. I asked him to talk to me when he was ready since he told me he wasn’t ready to talk yet. We haven’t spoken in a week and I find out he went to 2 of my friends to tell them I am crazy and haven’t changed. That I blew up his pager that week. I said all good stuff other then asking to not talk to my friends. It wasn’t a lot but it did take several pages since the pager doesn’t allow you to text much. What is he doing? I figure I leave him alone…if I see him just smile and love him so he can see the changes. But it is very hurtful that he didn’t respect my wishes. Is he testing me?
He was supposed to buy his ticket to visit, and he had not. When I got home he called me. When I asked if he was still visiting, he said he wanted more, he did not know me as well as he would like, the calls were not building the relationship for him and seeing each other once a month would not be enough. That day and that day only during our calls, I said I knew the two months would be hard, that we still should get to know each other, that it thought we were falling, and that I while not there, I could have seen him as my husband (not yet, but could see it). I felt confused as he had been leading, initiating most calls, was the one saying love you, and asking to talk. He said that I was great emotionally and verbally and he did value me. I finally said, I want you to have what you want and wish you the best.
Nothing would astonish him more than realizing that, after all these years of spending every weekend partying with him, you've decided on picking Angela and Susanna over him to go shopping and partying. Of course he wouldn't mind that, well I hope he's not the possessive kinds, but let me tell you, every guy, no matter how liberal and 'open' he is in a relationship, cannot do without missing you on a routine, if you disrupt it one fine day. There you dress up for the evening with your girls, and he's already missing you.

Long story short, if I had taken the advice of this article, he may have never cone back to me. When he was weak and kicking himself for messing up, he pulled back. Pulled back so far that he couldn’t see the potential that I did for us. I was able to be strong and fight for what I wanted, and show him that there are other kinds of women out there who won’t “hate him” for accidentally falling asleep and missing our date. I’ve shown him what true love is, and now that he sees he can be loved, he has given his full heart to me.

In addition to the pulling away he is very cruel when he drinks. Calling me horrible names and tries to make me feel beneath him. I know this is huge red flags but love makes us do crazy things. We’re both sexually open minded but he tells me I’m a liar about talking about having another woman intimately. I feel him and I aren’t ready for this. At least I’m not ready. It’s a unhealthy dysfunctional relationship and while he has his faults I know I push him to the limits. (Blowing up how phone etc)
Wow, the anger. No wonder you may be having relationship issues. It has nothing to do with lying or hiding true feelings. It’s about letting a guy have his space. If you come after me saying how horrible I am etc. etc. I will NEVER want to see you again. Nobody likes that kind of women, and no man wants to date his mother. Also pulling away is not “bad behavior.” Would you rather he spend time with you but verbally and physically abuse you? Bad behavior is if the guy is rude and abusive and mean, etc. Pulling away is a man’s way of saying “Look, I like you a lot, but I really need some time and space to sort things out.” If you can’t accept that not everything is rosy and happy all the time, and that if the man you “love” needs to pull away and you just bark and say “you’re behaving badly,” then you have no reason to be in a relationship.

You may want to have a unique scent for your date nights and one for your holidays, or you may want to have a unique scent for when you get busy in the bedroom. That scent can be lightly sprayed on something when you are gone, and if he catches a whiff of it, you will be the first thing to enter his mind. The more he associates that scent with good times, the more he will miss you.
Understanding that you do not need a man in order to be the best version of yourself is crucial. Loving yourself and doing exactly what makes you happy is key, which means that you need to know how to be happy alone. When you have this type of mentality, you will be able to spot red flags instantly and become more admirable. If a man wants to be with you, he will make it known throughout the relationship. He will make it known in healthy ways of properly courting you. He’s not going to send you the late night 11 pm or 1 am text for you to come over and “watch a movie.”
You can’t simply think about committing to someone if you aren’t in love. You may have a crush, but you need some time to start falling in love. We want a serious relationship and someone to share our dreams, but it is not all about taking that step and getting what you want. The more important thing is with whom you will be taking that step. If he’s the right man for you, and still keeps his distance, then proceed to next steps.
It is a common belief that women are the more complicated party in a relationship. But men are not always simple to understand either! Because men can also be complicated, making them very hard to read. And most of the time, men tend to pull away without giving any reasons. If you are keen to find out more why men pull away, this article is for you. Read on.
Ladies…all I can say is if you feel insecure about your looks then make yourself more attractive for YOU! Not for a man. There’s nothing that increases a woman’s feelings of insecurity more than doing something to herself FOR a man, or for the purpose of attracting men. It may make you feel confident and powerful in the short term, but that feeling doesn’t last if your focus is on doing it for him. Your purpose should be feeling better about yourself and increasing your own confidence regardless of men. What men seem to forget is that women are not on this earth solely for their pleasure. How you feel about yourself should be totally independent of what men think.
I’ve been “hanging out” with this guy off and on for two years. Before meeting him I read books on this exact subject. I’ve been married and divorced twice so I wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing if I got involved with a man again. I’m very opened about my feels I always have been. I like that about myself but in the past I’ve also been pushy wanting things to happen right away. Now with this guy I’m “hanging out” with has pulled away a lot in the 2 yrs I’ve been seeing him, but he had always come back. I think it’s because I always gave him his space. Since being married and divorced twice taking things slow was fine with me. Just recently though, I couldn’t help myself and I told him that I loved him. I thought for sure he was going to pull away, but he didn’t not right away anyways. In fact, we talked about making it exclusive. I was so happy because it’s what I had been waiting patiently for two years for. Recently, we had a two year anniversary of when we met so being the person I am I gave him a card. I said a paragraph of very heartfelt things. I knew this would definitely make him pull away from me and I was right. Even though I know when it’s going to happen it still doesn’t make it easy to deal with. I love him and I want him to know this. I want him to know that I accept him for who he is. I feel the only way I’m going to get him to trust me is by letting him have his time away from me. When he comes back he’s different, for instance, he more loving sweeter. I believe him when he says he’s happy with me. He too has been in difficult relationships in the past that broke his heart. Love isn’t meant to go fast. Love takes time. I’m glad it’s going this way even though it’s hard because I came from abusive background and it’s why my marriages ended. This guy inspires me to grow and find myself. I’ve started back to school at 43 yrs old because of his encouragement. I don’t feel I have to be someone I’m not when I’m with him. I feel safe when I’m with him. I want him to feel the same when he’s with me. I feel that’s what true love is all about. I may love him but he’s not my whole world, he’s only part of it.
But FACT is that you have 2 choices (regardless of whether he’s a jerk and blowing you off, or if he genuinely cares about you and just needs space), you can chase after him demanding answers, or you can just breathe and get your own space, some me-time, rejuvinate yourself, get happy again outside of him. In time he will either disappear, never to be seen again, or he will come back. The point is that either way you will be fine because you’re happy anyway. This compared to chasing him, hunting him down, where you lose yourself in trying to get him/get answers/get even <– this is not healthy, and you end up sadder than if you just let go.
It is a common belief that women are the more complicated party in a relationship. But men are not always simple to understand either! Because men can also be complicated, making them very hard to read. And most of the time, men tend to pull away without giving any reasons. If you are keen to find out more why men pull away, this article is for you. Read on.
Plan, plan, plan. Fay suggests making an appointment, but not necessarily at night when everyone is tired. Maybe during the baby's Saturday afternoon nap or a "before-work quickie." Ask friends or family to take the kids every other Friday night for a sleepover. "When sex is on the calendar, it increases your anticipation," Fay says. Changing things up a bit can make sex more fun, too, she says. Why not have sex in the kitchen? Or by the fire? Or standing up in the hallway?
Whether or not you and your partner get together again after you’ve given them space or not, it is a sign that your partner could do it again to you at any point and becomes so overwhelmed in their emotions that they can’t handle expressing it to you. There are cases where perhaps you’ve been spending too much time together and/or you’ve become a bit too dependent on the person, but this shouldn’t be a good enough reason to not contact someone for a few days. Nor is when something happens in their life. Unless that situation is explained, and the person can understand then that’s fine.
3.5 years ago he was my friend.we have 100s of mutual friend from school.We shared every thing we eat everyday how close friend we were.we met sometimes.I falled in love with him after 3 months of friendship.I felt so much pain inside because of insecurity because he did not know i am in love.After many thought oneday i told him that I am in love with u so badly.That day he said “Dont misunderstand me.I never said I love u.This is my last and final message to u.” Then he blocked me from every social media.
I was with my ex for 8 months, he came on to me very quickly told me he loved me within 3 weeks (we would talk a lot, at his request) He called me all the time, texted me that he loved me like 10 times a day. Everything was good between us. He is a single father of a little girl, he has full custody of her so I know he was busy a lot that’s why I hardly called and waited for him to call me back. He would always call me back when he said he would and that made me feel secure because he was consistent. But in March I started getting a gut feeling something was wrong, he wasn’t calling me back like before, our nightly talks started diminishing and the last time we had sex it was bad. We only got to see each other on the weekends and would have our alone time every other week, so it bothered me. I asked him a couple of times if everything was ok and he would say yes but I felt him distant. One morning after not getting his 3:45am good morning text, I texted him to wake up and he replied oh sorry I forgot I was putting gas. My intuition was bugging me so bad , so I told him that I was not happy that he was changing and I didn’t know why. He said he knew we weren’t talking as much but that didn’t change his feelings for me but that he was “busy” all of a sudden he is to busy to talk to me. I knew right there that his feelings had changed for me. He told me to do whatever I wanted like if I was the only one in the relationship. So I broke it off over a text. How sad is that! I then text him later on in the day and told him that I didn’t like how things ended that we should talk and he replied “I’m sorry its not going to work out. I am not talking or seeing anyone, I apologized for everything I just need time for myself” We broke up April 6 and I’m still having a hard time. The last time I saw him I was upset at him we had an argument but he told me “I love you, I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I’m not a little boy I know what I want and its you” A week later we brake up and he doesn’t want me. We were planning on moving in, in June and we were actively trying to conceive baby. I feel broken and its been hard to move on. He hasn’t reached out to me after all the love he claimed to have for me. I fell in love with him and here I am broken while he has moved on with his life posting away on his Instagram. He is private but I can tell he has been actively been posting pictures. Has anyone been through something like this? I saw the red flags but I chose to ignore them, he had only been single for 2 months he lied about it, the way he came on to me so quickly acting needy wanting to talk on the phone for hours, telling me he loved me within 3 weeks of meeting each other. I’m not sure but I have a feeling he is seeing someone else that’s why he didn’t give a sh*t about our relationship at the end.

When I was younger I always used to real men in and then cast them back out. So when I was with them I was fun, talked about them more than me and didn’t ever nag them but as soon as the day/night ended I wouldn’t call or text (or even really think about them) til they got back in touch. Men love women like that. Since having kids and now being single again it’s not quite so easy due to lack of spare time and me worrying that each person isn’t going to be good enough for the rest of my life, but after reading this I need to get back on track with my old ways. When I was in a relationship I was exactly the same and would never expect them to do boring things like shopping or visiting my mums house for dinner and I wouldn’t gatecrash their family events. I’d encourage them to go and see friends but they end up wanting to be with you more then .
You already have your revamped wardrobe, and that balayage hair treatment has your entire appearance on fleek. Now, all you need to do is whip your body into shape. After being in a relationship with your ex, it’s possible that you packed on a few love pounds, and now’s the time to shed them! Reactivate that gym membership, throw on your favorite pair of sneakers, and dust off your Lululemon pants. It’s time to sculpt your “revenge body” that will make your ex regret the day the two of you parted ways. By looking and feeling amazing from the inside out, your ex will know that you’ve moved on, and you’re life is headed in a positive direction. It will definitely crush his ego a bit, and he will start to reminisce about all the good days the two of you shared. Prepare to receive a phone call or a text message from him spilling his guts about how much he misses you!
I met this guy online 3 months ago. We were texting each other continuously for 1 month before we actually meet. He is not boring and really fun to talk to and we have some similarities. The first time we met is on a club. He has 2 guys with him and I have one girl by my side. It was cool but I left early because I have work the following day. He then asked me to go out in a club, i said no because i have an event to attend, but I invited him on my birthday party. It was fun and that’s the first time we kissed. The next day we went out on a restaurant with his guy friend and everything was going so fine. then he left for work at a 160km town away from my city. We still communicate and now he asked me to go to that town with him. At first i said no, but then I go on with my girl friend coz she wants me to happy… we had an amazing weekend at his town. I stayed in his house. We drink, had moments together and even asked me why im shy around him. We kissed and acted like a couple. He talked about his family and his life, goals. At this moment we are very close but we are not talking about being together. I dont want to ask him coz i dont want him to feel pressured..
If someone cheats on you, speaks poorly of you, disrespects you, or makes you feel crazy, inadequate, or unloved, they do not deserve to have your love or attention. There are so many other people and opportunities for you to find joy and happiness in this world. You portray madness when trying to put a square peg in to a circular hole and similarly you don’t need to keep hammering away at a broken relationship. Seek positive relationships instead. Good luck…
The best new boyfriend advice is to drop any effort on your part to close that space. Resist the temptation to ask him what’s wrong or to step up your efforts in order to get a response from him. Don’t call him or email him or drop by his place. Let him make the choice to come to you. When he does, it also makes you feel better. It makes you feel desired by him.
My ex (5 month relationship) broke up with me two months ago and a week later went straight to a rebound relationship. He text me out of the blue and asked me how I was and then said we should go get food. He also said that he wants to just be friends. So my question is, why the heck is he texting me to go get food when he is still dating his “rebound”?! I still have feelings for him and he knows that. Hence the reason he told me he just wants to be friends. Everybody knows you can’t be “just friends” with a guy you still have feelings for. I feel like he is playing games with me and going to get food is only going to hurt me more….knowing he doesn’t want to date me. What should I do? Not go? Or TRY to be “Just Friends”??
I met this guy at work. We started working together and became close friends. One day l invitedhim to my place. We were watching a movie (nothing romantic) and he kissed me. I hadnt seen it coming. I asked what that was all about and said if he wants me, he should say so. He said he likes me. He looked a bit young so l asked how hold he is. He would avoid a direct answer and say “l am old enough” or “l am not a child” and “Age doesnt matter”. He never asked me formally to be his girlfriend but he would treat me as such, we went on dates and communicated frequently. Then one day he said, by the way, l just made 26 years in May. I am 30. I was devastated considering l asked him ftom the start how old he is. He said he didnt tell me then because he was scared of how l would react. We talked about it and he said age doesnt matter. But then there were moments he wouldnt communicate. He would just shut me out and when l ask what is wrong, he will say he is getting through personal issues. I gave him space. We meet a lot at my place but never at his. When l called one day and his phone was off for two days, l went looking for his house (l dropped him home once but he didnt invite me in, saying his house was a mess and it was late). I found him home n he was shocked to see me. The pattern continued though…he being so all over me one time and withdrawn the next minute. So l sent him a ling message breaking it off. He didnt reply. But said hi at work and we spoke like normal workmates n he sent me a text about work. Recently l asked him why he didnt respond to my breakup message. He said it was complex and he wanted to give me my space. He asked if l am still his friend and l didnt respond and he got worked up about it. Since l broke things off, he communicates more…he even calls and texts in a tone friendlier than when we were together. I still have feelings for him but l dont know what this is. Did l push him away? Is he scared of me (l earn more, have a car and land and a car and a bigger house)? Is he worth another try (he is hard working, smart, caring even sometimes and has plans – we’d even talked kids and marriage) or l should stick to my breakup message and let go?
Two months ago I met a man. We were so attracted to each other that it all happened so fast, on the first date. He warned me that he didn’t want a relationship… I did my best to listen to his feelings, show understanding and get some intimacy and we eventually got close and started meeting every week. I was sleeping over at his house, we were having good time, having sex, doing normal things like cooking and spending the whole weekend together. I knew he had a very problematic past – a father who never married his mother or took any responsibility, a brother from another mother who caused him problems, personal problems with drugs in the past and two broken relationships with 1) bulimic anorexic girl and 2) a girl who cheated on him 10 months ago. I was so good to listen, give him the peace he needed and be very patient with him.
Update: I had a legal question so I texted him after about 6 weeks from when he asked for space, and he responded quite eagerly, and told me he would normally not give legal advice to someone he found so sexy and with whom he has intimate relations… he told me I owed him dinner but I just laughed and thanked him for the legal advice. Now it’s his time to wait!! I texted him again a few days ago with another legal question, and he called me today on the phone because he said that he could only answer the question off record and not in writing. He told him that normally he would not give out free legal advice, but he liked me and wanted to help. I thanked him and he said he wanted us to talk again soon… Slow moving but promising! :)
So me and my boyfriend live together for about a year now. We were dating for almost 3 years. He broke up with me few days ago. I’m still at his house. We haven’t talked at all but when he gets home and lays down with me in bed. He hugs me so hard and doesn’t let go until he falls asleep. That’s all we been doing after we broke up. What does it mean?

If you have to issue ultimatums to get him to commit to a relationship, you may end up hurting each other in the process. Anything done under duress is bound to blow up in your face. If you don’t want to end up with a disastrous relationship, you should avoid forcing someone’s hand. This should not even be on the list of the things to do if you want to learn how to get a man to commit.
Anyways, we went on a date. Which snowballed into many dates and nights spent together. I was falling in love hard and fast. It seemed so mutual, until my birthday. I suggested we spend it together to which he replied he’d take me out for dinner! (Days beforehand we changed the dinner date to the day *after* my bday & spent my actual bday in bed watching movies.)

What women are really looking for during the first several dates is if she feels an emotional connection with you. Having meaningful conversations show that you’re truly interested in who she is as a person rather than just wanting to get her into bed. Show her right off the bat that you’re genuinely interested in getting to know her by sharing something about yourself. You will signal to her that you’re willing to be open with her, which allows her the opportunity to let her guard down and reciprocate. Find out if you have any shared interests and values and don’t forget to be a gentlemen on your date by treating her with respect.
I have been with my bf for just over a year lived with him for just over 6 of those, it’s been great he’s really been open and honest about his feelings but for the past month or so I have noticed how much he has thrown himself into work (self employed so can do as little or much as he pleases) and so our time together has dwindled? I challenged him over this as I wanted to spend time with him doing nice things all the time getting “as soon as much jobs are all done” which could be anytime! I truly believe he was now starting his pulling away stage, I am now worried that I have ‘ran’ after him too much and made things much much worse by delaying his pulling away possibly even ensuring he has had enough and is ready to call it a day! Hes working away at the moment and before he went we had another petty argument in which I stupidly told him that we should have some space with no communication whilst hes away (I felt like I couldn’t do right for doing wrong) I’m scared I have ruined it completely now! I self blame quite a lot (past relationship issues) since away he has texted me and told me he is also to blame for these issues and that with time he’s sure we will be alright, Please help what should I do, what actions should I take? If this is pulling away, will he be able to return still or has this gone too far? He’s due home on Thursday, how do I allow him time in his man cave when we live together?
I havent talked to him since then and this happened saturday im so hurt and I cant stop crying. He told me give him a week before we start talking again. (How do I deal with this???)I dont know what to do I can’t stop thinking about him and I keep checking my phone for him to text me. Does he miss me? He told me hes there for me but how can I talk to him if its about us he knows how I feel and he still left in hurt so much its killing me I havent been able to eat or sleep properly…. I don’t wanna wait but I know I have to I cant get him out of my mind. His close friend told me we were around each other to much and said we just need time apart. Everyone I talk to tells me give him space he misses me and thinks we will get back together. Its so hard from one point seeing him every day talking every day to nothing at all. I want him back so bad. It hurts so much and I don’t know what to do all I can do is give him time and wait for him to talk to me again…. Please any advise or what you think will help me.
Commitment is a funny thing. We allow our desire for it and other people’s promises of it, to blind and paralyze us from seeing and acting upon red/pink flags that are often, right in front of our face from the get-go. “How to get him to commit to a serious relationship,” is something I’ve Googled too many times to count. I ended up finding the answer through life-living, mistake-making, time-wasting decisions that sabotaged the chances of anyone ever wanting to commit to me in any regard.

Answer: Remind him what he was chasing you for. Show him that just because he’s won over you doesn’t mean he gets to keep you. Instead of groveling and chasing him, turn the tables and make him work to get you back. If you remind him that you can be just fine without him, he’s likely to begin the hunt and chase all over again. [Read: How to keep a guy interested in 30 super sexy ways]


End the conversation first. Start hanging up the phone or ending the text conversation before he does, especially if you’re usually the last to say goodbye. Being the first to end the conversation will leave him wanting more, and keep you on his mind until he talks to you again. This longing for more communication will start to drive him wild with his desire to talk to you.[3]
See, if he has already introduced you to his friends and family, that’s a good sign. It means he likes you and trusts you enough to open up about the people in his life. So use that to your advantage. Hang out with his friends and family as often as you can. Make plans to watch movies, hang out at the mall or just go shopping. And then make them have a great time. If these people end up liking you, he too will end up liking you more, thus accelerating his chances of committing to you.
The two of you share a strong emotional and social connection with each other. It is possible that he is unable to nourish a relationship with you at this time. It is clear that he is busy, so he may have a tight schedule. Determine what you want for your future. Speak with him about your thoughts and feelings, and perhaps attempt to spend additional time with him in person. Have a great day, Julie!
Guys are typically not the masters of two-minute mushy talks, but listening to his voice even for a short time will surely bring a smile to your face. You can also try face-timing him to make it a little more realistic or use Skype or something similar. Hearing his voice is great but seeing his face is even better. Keep in mind this may be tricky depending on what part of the world your man is in, you certainly don't want to wake him up with a call in the middle of the night. Plan out a time when the two of you can talk and go for it.
2. Manage your expectations. Are you, dear Dignity Dater, envisioning yourself walking down the aisle with your new guy…who you’ve been dating for three weeks? Stop right there. It’s imperative you don’t assume too much, especially too soon. You must stay in the moment! When you have too many expectations for your future relationship with someone new whom you’re dating, you are surely setting yourself up for disappointment. If you spend hours fantasizing about his proposal or the wedding and find yourself doodling the names of your imagined first born daughter, STOP it now. Take a deep breath whenever you notice this happening and ask yourself, “What’s true NOW?” Even if you have to reality check yourself a zillion times a day, making sure you’re interested in HIM versus interested in the possibility of who HE is as your future husband can be a game-changing shift in mindset. When you get disappointed about something that he doesn’t even know you’re thinking about, and you begin “leaking” hints about what it is you want, it can actually push a man away. So be in the moment, be your authentic self, and have a good time collecting data about him, his values, and yourself.
My ex broke up with me about two weeks ago out of the blue. I felt so blindsided because I thought everything was going extremely well and didn’t sense that anything was bothering him. He said he really liked me but wasn’t so sure about the future. Haven’t reached out to him at all and he hasn’t either. Idk what to think because I thought he really cared about me. I keep hoping he’ll text me to say that he made a mistake. What should I do?

I was in a relationship for fours with my boyfriend,on the 3rd year things staterd to get ugly for us.he was cheating and i couldn’t cope at all so as i was busy with work stuff i decided to take myself out.Then when i was out i met a nice and we kept going out together,having so much fun.So now he found out that i was cheating n i did confess because i ddnt wanna live with the guilt everyday,he was so furious with me.i apologised and gave him some time to heal over,until i contacted him again and asking him if he was still okay!He invited me over which we were separated for 3 months.When i came over he was fine and we enjoyed each other,until today morning when i saw on whatsapp he posted this girl which he is involved with her.when i was with him he said he has 2 months not seeing her,so when i saw that post i feeaked out because he wrote that she is his everything and forever.so i contacted him and asked him about it and he said to me that he put it because the girl said to him she thinks she is pregnant.So now i am really confused and i don’t know what to do with this situation.Should i move on?or do i stay and fight for him?but what if the other girl is really pregnant?
Once you’ve rocked his world, don’t say, “OK, I rocked you, now pay me back with your lifelong commitment.” That won’t work. Show him that he must earn that privilege. And keep earning it. I’m not talking about berating, withholding or any other mind-f*ck thing we all despise. (Not sure what I mean? Find out why “you go girl” thinking is the worst advice.)
The best new boyfriend advice is to drop any effort on your part to close that space. Resist the temptation to ask him what’s wrong or to step up your efforts in order to get a response from him. Don’t call him or email him or drop by his place. Let him make the choice to come to you. When he does, it also makes you feel better. It makes you feel desired by him.

Hello I can imagine your going through a hard time trying to understand this guy. He’s confusing you because he’s confused himself. He has distanced himself because this is what guys do when they are thinking if they want to be with you or not. This also shows how he doesn’t care much about you and more about himself. He says these things like I miss you and all that stuff to make sure your still around for him as an option but does his words match his actions? If he missed you he woukd see you. Does he see you? No ? Then he’s not telling the truth he’s using words to keep you about for his own ego and loneliness. There’s a way u can find out if he wants to be with you or not and that’s by ignoring him he sends u a msg like I miss you can I talk to u or just hello no mater what his msg says u say nothing. A woman’s silence shows and expresses your hurt more than your anger and words do. This also gives him time to properly miss you and it also stops you looking easy in his eyes men want a challenge they want to chase so give him what he wants and don’t feel bad about it either he hurt you did he care ? Sounds like he didn’t.
So stop over-explaining every little thing, stop sharing all of your childhood stories with him, and don’t let him know what you’re doing at all hours of the day. Keep some things to yourself, and it will make him even more curious about who you really are. He will subconsciously know that in order to peel back all of your layers, he needs to take the next step and ask you for exclusivity.

Hello,I broke up with my boyfriend year ago ,we were together for 5 years ..I broke up with him …he was not calling he has done it once or twice n once on WhatsApp ! Last month he got married !! I don’t know how to make him miss me again I love him n I know he loves me back !! Any chance hell come back again ? I’m dying crying out my heart for him ! But i sent him only one statement after seeing his marriage photo on Facebook n he replied ! Since then I decided not to talk to him again (the no contact rule ) what else should I do ?
One such expert is James Bauer, an experienced dating and relationship coach. Not only does he know exactly why men do this, but as a result of so many of his female clients coming to him with this very problem, he has also developed a very effective solution that he has taught to hundreds of women who are now having the relationship success they deserve.
since 3 months we know each other..after a big conflict and feeling suffocated by me ..he has his own work related and family issues which I dint know earlier and I always kept him accusing n blaming for why is he ignoring me..but he has always been very polite inspite of my anger n anxiety..he needs space and told me he loves me and will call me back..just a second day

#5 He is stressed out at work. Men are not like women. They are not multi-taskers. If he is preoccupied with something like work, he probably isn’t capable of keeping his focus on two things at once. If you notice that he’s no longer as interested as he used to be, it’s important for you to start looking not only at his behavior but at what is going on with his family and work life as well. It may have absolutely nothing to do with you at all.
Hi Alexandra, This is exactly what happens to me. A lot. Do everything by the book and it does not produce results. Generally you suddenly see these guys with some bland Miss Piggy woman a month or so later. From what I have understood so far, these men think they are not good enough for you. Unfortunately, I never found any way of solving this. Once they believe this, you cannot change it. Only he can. Just find a guy who thinks he IS worthy of you. Very hard to find. Classy agency is your best bet.
Do not say yes every time he asks you out Saying sorry, I’m busy, to every third or fourth date guarantees to keep him interested and challenged to win you over. If he asks you why you are busy keep it vague saying you already had plans for that night. Then suggest the following evening. That is all he needs to know. He will wonder if there is another man in the picture and that will set off his hunter instincts. This will drive him mad with desire trying to figure out where you are and who you are with.
It is no secret that the 21st century woman still loves the quality of chivalry in a man. But you will surprise him if you make the move and ask him out on a date for a change. This could go either way – He could feel relaxed and happy giving you the reigns of planning your romantic rendezvous, or he could feel weirdly surprised watching you take charge. Either way, you will grab his attention. Book the tables, drive him there, drop him home and look into his eyes as you say I Love You and kiss him goodnight – Do whatever it takes to show him that you can wear the pants too.
Answer: Sometimes all he needs is a little coaxing to figure out what’s going on. That involves being patient and giving him space and time to figure things out for himself and to discover what it is that he’s feeling. If you keep questioning him, things are going to get more jumbled, which will only lead to more confusion and will keep you two at odds. [Read: 9 ways to get your man to start communicating with you]

So, I met him accidentlly one night on the way to a friend’s place after a party. th is guy’s bike had broke down n he also had bruises on him because had slipped. i asked my friends to stop to help him. my friends helped him n I, God knows why, invited him over to my friend’s place, one of the reasons may be because it was late at night and he stayed close to my friend’s place. He accepted. We hit it off right away. we stayed up all night, all of us and talked. next morning he also stayed back for breakfast. he randomly gave out his #. but i did not save it. instead one of my friend(guy) did. I was leaving the city pretty soon. so, my friends and i were planning for house party at my place. he offered to come, too and suggested he’d cook as a thank you for helping him.
since 3 months we know each other..after a big conflict and feeling suffocated by me ..he has his own work related and family issues which I dint know earlier and I always kept him accusing n blaming for why is he ignoring me..but he has always been very polite inspite of my anger n anxiety..he needs space and told me he loves me and will call me back..just a second day

You are in many ways his wife and his mistress in one person. You have perfect control over your emotions. You always present your “better self” to him. You avoid all the clingy behaviors that you know will turn him off. You’re friendly and mature…because you know you’re attractive. You don’t have to throw a tantrum just to keep his interest. No desperate tactics.

Whether you’re in a new relationship or have been with your partner for a while, you must consider this key relationship advice for women if you want to succeed. Since relationships can be challenging and can have their fair share of ups and downs, being prepared for whatever a relationship can bring is imperative. For women especially, it’s important to take heed of these five essential pieces of advice in order to have the kind of long-lasting, happy, and healthy relationship that you so desire and deserve.

Answer: Stop trying to make something happen when it isn’t right. Most women who find themselves in this position know in their heart that something isn’t right. Instead of pursuing him to find out what’s going on with him, it may be time for you to find that person inside of you who knows you deserve someone who is completely into you, not just staying to avoid hurting your feelings. [Read: 16 signs it’s time to move on and end the relationship]
When you spend time apart, share your fun times with your man. It’s important he knows you’re able to have fun without him. After you spend a few nights away from your man, he may be happy you’re having a good time, but he’ll also become jealous. You want him to wish he’s the one helping you have fun. This is a great strategy if you want to reunite with an old flame. Make him see all of the fun he’s missing without you. If he sees how much fun you’re having his going to want to come along on your next adventure. This is also a good time to start updating your social media feed so he can see all the fun you’re having. Guys are definitely more visual creatures so give him something good to look it and he’ll be hooked, which brings us to our next step.
For instance, tell him that you need some time to work on your individual goals, and that requires you to be alone and have some quiet time to think. Or, you can do what my friend does. She credits going out of town once a month to a weekend yoga retreat as very important to her spiritual health. Since her husband is not into yoga or spirituality, he has no desire to come along and doesn’t get offended because he knows that she finds it important to rebalance and be a better person and wife in general. But, he is reminded of how important she is in his life when she goes, and he misses her presence every time she has to go away.
Hi I have been dating my boyfriend for two years now he used to be like the best thing ever made be feel loved like never before. But of recent he got in to medical school and it started stressing him out and he started giving me less attention and I was actually going through a lot during this period and he was so busy that he wasn’t giving me attention so I started complaining and fighting with him a lot and asking for more attention but eventually he started avoiding me and every time I am with him and his not doing what I want I would start crying and I could feel him drifting away more and more then I spoke to him one night and he said he was indifferent about the relationship and wants us to be friends I cried so much and begged him for a second chance he actually really cares for me this Part I know out of pity he gave me a second chance then a few days ago he sent a random text saying his sorry he ever hurt me and he loves me so much but he still doesn’t call or text me much it hurts cause I really love him and I don’t want to loose i just need advice on what to do because all I want to do is talk to him every time but I don’t want to chock him and if his online and doesn’t text me I start to feel like he doesn’t want to talk to me the thing is how do i give him space and still make him love me as much as he used to
Long story short, if I had taken the advice of this article, he may have never cone back to me. When he was weak and kicking himself for messing up, he pulled back. Pulled back so far that he couldn’t see the potential that I did for us. I was able to be strong and fight for what I wanted, and show him that there are other kinds of women out there who won’t “hate him” for accidentally falling asleep and missing our date. I’ve shown him what true love is, and now that he sees he can be loved, he has given his full heart to me.
So you’ve mastered the ways to stop a man from withdrawing, and everything seemed to be headed in a rosier direction, it’s time to implement some positive communication skills. Once you’ve calmed down from analyzing and you’ve created some much-needed space, it’s time to figure out how to express how you’re feeling without causing more ripples in your relationship.
My ex and I had been seeing each for a year and half, we are both people who never thought we would end up together but eventually it all happened. He dumped me yesterday using the excuse that he is not 100% in. Before this for the past month he has been on and off with the way he feels, sayin he wants me then testing himself to try not and see me for a week but then rocks up at my house when his drunk and with no invite. The next night he invited me over I brought up a question that’s had been bothering me for ages and from there it all went south and he ended it but then said he doesn’t want me to leave sad, we woke the next morning and said he made a mistake and doesn’t want to break up, and then And then as I left he through a 180 and changed his mind but sat there’s crying as he ended it but said he still loved me but it’s for the best. I love the boy dearly and want him back more than anything the way he has ended it has confused me beyound no doubt with his constant change in thought. He says he loves me then dumps me the next day. My worry with your steps is that he is a stubborn and when he makes a decision that usually how it’ll stay but then again he over thinks everything to a point that he hurts his head. My other worry Is that he has deleted me from most social media saying he can’t handling seeing me, so the only time he would see me is maybe out in town. How is meant to miss me if I’m not there to remind him of what his missing. I love this boy and I’m sure you can understand that it feels like I’m having a heart attack over here everytime I breath.
Long story short, if I had taken the advice of this article, he may have never cone back to me. When he was weak and kicking himself for messing up, he pulled back. Pulled back so far that he couldn’t see the potential that I did for us. I was able to be strong and fight for what I wanted, and show him that there are other kinds of women out there who won’t “hate him” for accidentally falling asleep and missing our date. I’ve shown him what true love is, and now that he sees he can be loved, he has given his full heart to me.
So it was never an official relationship. But we had been dating regularly for about a month. Quite a lot of phone/ text contact. The vibe was easy, flirty, and really quite open and emotional too. He was so comfortable with me. He shared so much of himself and his thoughts and his feelings. We both agreed that we would just take it slow and easy and see how things develop. Then one night I stayed over, and we had sex, but it was really awkward. Just before he got really upset with me and told me that he thought I was a tease and making him feel desperate and needy. I was just being playful and I wasn’t sure if I wanted to sleep with him that night. Actually I didnt really. But he got mad and told me that he thought I was playing games and somehow I panicked and slept with him. But it was not good. Anyway, I felt depressed the next day, and told him about it. (MISTAKE) which i redeemed later and after a few days things were ok again. But he wouldn’t call me as frquently and he stopped being warm when he did contact me. He used to call me princess and sweetheart. All that stopped. So I got nervous. He would call me once a week to say he was super busy and didn’t have time to meet (this is true because of his job) but I thought he was making excuses not to see me. And I kept asking him. And then I asked him one night and it turned into an argument that went on till 2am and the next day he sent me a text to say that it was his last text to me for a while and that we shoudl just be friends and get a peaceful closure on things. So I called and agreed and said yes, but I also reminded him that it wasn’t like we were a couple anyway, and that we were just friends anyway. And I mentioned that I might be moving away really soon ( i had a job interview which required me to relocate, incidentally I didnt get it,but at the time I hadnt told anyone) so he said that he didn’t know and he asked me twice to let him know how it went. That was three weeks ago and I havent’ been in touch. I didnt call him on his birthday, and i havent told him about my interview. But I miss him everyday. Im working on becoming my best self. BUt I really want to be close to him. I miss him. Do I have a chance, or has he lost the attraction for me?
Guys are well known for wanting sex. Some of us long for that kind of physical intimacy. You’ve met the perfect guy, yet you’re trying your best to show him how much of a lady you are. Truth be told, any dating rules you follow which suggest you wait for specific amount of dates will do more harm than good for your dating life. You should have sex whenever you feel comfortable having sex.
This is an important point to mention, because men who persist in overtly negative behavior in your presence are antagonizing you. They’re testing you to see whether you will tolerate being taken for granted or if you’re going to call them on it. A woman of class and self-respect WILL walk away, because she’s not interested in any man that gives her less than 100% of his full attention.
Commitment problems can come from a wide range of places. Perhaps they had a relationship that was horrible and their ex cheated on them. This would obviously make them hesitant to commit to someone else. They may also have parent issues that explain their commitment issues. First, you need to figure out why they are that way so you can tailor your behavior to make them want to commit. [Read: 13 signs he wants a relationship but has commitment issues]
Perform mental health check-ins from time to time:  Does being with him make you happy or do come away from your dates feeling troubled or angry?  Do you feel lifted up when you think of him?  Is he respectful of you, your work and your passions or does he denigrate them?  Most importantly, does he find value in you and what you contribute to his life?  Do you find value in him and what he contributes to yours?
My boyfriend has serious depression and anxiety, he feels worthless even when i’m the one at fault. How do i make sure that he knows i won’t leave him? I’ve told him countless times and he says he understands but sometimes he’ll make a comment like “well this will cause you to leave me” or “you’re gonna leave me after I say this…”. I really need some guidence because we are the love of eachothers lives (both of us has said it and he said it first)
Recently I was asked by a friend what relationship advice for women was actually essential. Honestly, dating and relationship advice is super easy to come by on the internet. I mean, I’ve personally written hundreds of articles about it, adding up to hundreds of thousands of words. And that’s just a drop in the ocean of other relationship advice out there.

You may want to actually have a good idea on what you’re talking about before making conclusions about people. One of the things Eric stresses in many of his articles is that a woman needs to be happy with her own life and love herself before she can truly be happy in a relationship. He also points out that if a woman is happy on her own, she will attract love and that it is then up to her to decide if a man is right for her. Kinda sounds like she’s the one in control of her own happiness. How is that sexist? In order to learn, you need to read the entire articles, not just pick out the parts that you can twist into being offensive. However, it’s quite clear that you have some serious anger issues towards men, in which case, how can you possibly expect to be in a happy relationship with one?


If going no contact is just a little too harsh, or you don’t think you can pull it off for 30-60 days, you can try another method to get your ex to miss you. After a breakup, it’s normal to want to hear from your ex, and you may be sitting by the phone waiting for him to call or text you. If you’re responding to all of his messages within a nanosecond, you’re not even giving the guy the opportunity to miss you. You’re far too available, and this sends off a message to your ex that you'll be right there waiting for him at all hours of the day. So instead of being so eager, back off a little bit and let his text message sit in your inbox for a few hours before responding. Some may call this game playing, but we think it’s the perfect recipe to get your ex to miss you! He’ll wonder why you’re no longer so quick to respond to him, and it will definitely make him miss hearing from you.
My boyfriend of a year and I has gotten into the second fight of our relationship. Like really over the top. Drinking was involved and he said some pretty hurtful things n it became physical on my end. I then proceeded to say some hurtful things. And I know they hurt because it hurts me to even think of what I said. Four five days went by of no contact. I reached out to him via private call. He answered and it was stale. You could hear he was happy to hear my voice but you can tell he didn’t want to talk. So I presumed in asking if I could stop by to see him later. He said yea and he’ll call when he got home. I guess he never made it home because he never called lol. J/k.
Women have an innate desire to be heard and understood. They want a partner who will listen to them without judgment and who will create an environment where they feel comfortable expressing vulnerability. Some of the best relationship advice for men is learning to master the skill of empathy. There are many ways to be empathetic, which include active listening, suspending any judgment or preconceived notions you may have about a given situation and putting yourself in her shoes, and showing positive body language to let her know that you’re engaged in the conversation.
If you lay everything out on a silver platter for your guy, he will not feel the urge to ask you to be in a relationship. When it comes to committing, men are more likely to lock you down if they are intrigued by you. To do this, you need to be more mysterious. This means, don’t tell him everything right away. You need to learn how to hold back, and share bits and pieces of yourself slowly to keep him interested.

My boyfriend of a year and I has gotten into the second fight of our relationship. Like really over the top. Drinking was involved and he said some pretty hurtful things n it became physical on my end. I then proceeded to say some hurtful things. And I know they hurt because it hurts me to even think of what I said. Four five days went by of no contact. I reached out to him via private call. He answered and it was stale. You could hear he was happy to hear my voice but you can tell he didn’t want to talk. So I presumed in asking if I could stop by to see him later. He said yea and he’ll call when he got home. I guess he never made it home because he never called lol. J/k.
My advice to you is: if you are not contented with your status quo, then leave, and learn to genuinely love yourself first. Do you honestly want a man who would continue to get the benefits of a committed relationship but does not want a committed relationship with you? If so then carry on but trust me that leads to despair. Leaving him and loving yourself first will benefit the both of you in the long run.
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