Men want no manipulation of any kind. They do not want to have to read their partner’s mind or try to interpret signals. They do not want to be forced to move faster in a relationship than they are ready. They do not want to be manipulated into taking all the blame for things gone wrong. They do not want to be on the receiving end of game playing. Women think men want little or no communication, and the only way to get needs met is through manipulation. Women think men either need or want to be reminded that the relationship needs to move forward. Women think men don’t want or value praise and acknowledgment, and so tend to only verbalize criticism.
If you’re going through this situation right now, don’t worry, you’re not alone. Getting a guy to commit seems like one of the hardest things in the world. We’ve all heard stories about men being commitment-phobes who are deathly afraid of having their independence ripped away for them, so you can’t really blame the guy for dragging his feet when it comes to locking you down, can you?

Me (34y) and my boyfriend (37y) went on a break after a 2y relationship , the first year was almost long distance ( 4-5h drive). We have been through arguments for the last months and I was expecting him a marriage proposal since I had mentioned my goal of dating and he has told he has been looking for the same thing. within these 2 years I have visited his relatives and hanging out with our friends and my family ( his parents are not in the same country). in our last conversation about a month ago and before the break, he said our intimacy and closeness has become less than it used to be and this makes him worried about the future life. after we agreed to go on a break over a text, we did not argue about the time and any rules. after a week I asked him to talk over the phone and suggesting that we can work on our relationship and ask help from couple therapists. He agreed somehow but also told he needs to think more. after 2 weeks and not hearing from him, I texted him and suggesting an end date. he told he would call me within a week but he did not. He texted me back and apologized and asked that he needed more days. I am confused and do not know what to do. I am surprised that he does not miss me? if we were in an argument or not a happy condition, he would have never stopped texting me before. it has been now a month of break and I just had texted him a couple of times within the first 2 weeks. I understand that he needs the space and need to work on his decisions. his birthday would be in a couple of days and I do not know what to do and I can not predict our future and if it is really a break our a breakup!
I reconnected with my ex after four years had gone by we been together now for 6 months the relationship has its ups and downs mostly downs we fight a lot but I love him very much and I want it to work between us he has been pulling back to the point were I’m afraid I’m losing him at first he was with me everyday now I barely see him he doesn’t call when he says he will he doesn’t keep his word it hurts so much so at first I poured my heart out to him over n over again trying to get him to see how much I cared and needed him that made it worse the past few days I’m trying to give him his space keep my mouth shut but it’s so hard I feel so neglected !!!!!!! How long should I give him his space before I confront him ???? This is not ok you can’t be so close to someone then suddenly pull away from them leaving them feelings horrible and rejected!!!!
A couple days later he’s still acting distant and he’s being short with me over text and I’ve tried asking him to come over but he’d say he has to clean his house or that he can’t then after goes to hang out with his friends knowing I asked him earlier if he could come over. And usually he would come hang out with me since we haven’t been hanging out instead of going out with his friends. I just feel after that that this is a sign that I need to let him have his space even though we haven’t hanged out in almost a week, I really hope this works because one of my girl friends said that he’s obsessed with me and that he said that I’m the ONE. He’s even thought of wedding ideas I mean c’mon he sounds like he’s head over heals for me right? and I just don’t see him going from loving me so much to distancing himself from me and not even wanting to see each other it seems. Maybe it was something I said to him over text to make him upset? I just don’t know but I will do anything to go back to the status of what our relationship was once before this all happened.
One quick way to push a man away is by pressuring him- especially when it comes to tying the knot. If you keep mentioning marriage to him and he doesn’t bite or he’s made it very clear he’s not ready for marriage but you keep pressing the issue, you will certainly push him further and further away. Men don’t want to be pressured about marriage (or kids for that matter). They are the man. They want to be in charge. When they are ready to make a commitment like that, trust me- they will let you know. Until then, don’t pressure him into doing anything he clearly doesn’t want to do. You wouldn’t want HIM to treat YOU like that, right? So don’t do it to him. If you’re unsure about where he stands on the topic of marriage, try bringing it up in a light and conversational way. If he seems intrigued, feel free to mention it every now and then. However, if he completely changes the subject or seems totally disinterested, I suggest cutting that conversation completely.
Yes!!! I made this mistake with my boyfriend when he said he wanted some space and instead i just kept pushing and pushing to fix things. Everything just got worse. It’s absolutely torture to try to not interact with the person you love but if he is having doubts, bugging him will prob make him pull away more and if he is having doubts in the first place maybe things aren’t meant to be. My whole philosophy is that if someone doesn’t enjoy being with me then I don’t want to be with them either.
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Hi.. My ex-boyfriend and I were in a LDR since end of 2014 and I cut off with him mid last year. The relationship was pretty turbulent but our feelings were passionate and intense. The reason for the ultimate disconnection was something he did. Since, I have not contacted him nor has he reached out to me – it’s almost going to be 10 months. I have been living my life – the past 6 months had me pretty preoccupied abroad even though he has been in my heart and mind. I still care about him deeply. I haven’t been productive these past few weeks as I was in the 6 months and that has me thinking even more about us. I miss him a lot. I have found myself doing what I can to know his current state via social media – his recent posts reflect sadness. What I would like to know is – is it possible for him to reach out to me after not having done so all these months, or is it unlikely? I feel like our story isn’t over and that he too still has me in his heart. I just find myself hoping that I will hear from him. He was blocked most of this time and I recently unblocked him. Answers and suggestions will be appreciated. I feel life is short, but I don’t wish to initiate any contact because rightfully he ought to reach out to me.

In other words: he becomes the center of your world and ultimately, that makes him even more distant. When a man senses that you’re so invested in him and how he feels about you, he becomes turned off. He was attracted to you in the first place because you had a life outside of him. He loved the fact that you made yourself responsible for your own happiness.
Write him a love letter. Be extra romantic and write down your feelings and emotions in a letter for your boyfriend to find later on his pillow, in his bag, or in his car. Use nice stationery and be as intimate and honest as you can. Seal the letter and leave it somewhere where he can find it easily. When he finds it and opens it, he will think of you and miss your loving presence.
It’s finally happening: you met a man you’re compatible with, you really like him, and the feeling is mutual. He’s showering you with attention, making plans to see you, making time to call you, and generally letting you know that he’s so happy to have found you. How does a man act when he’s falling in love? Just like this—and you’ve never been happier, or more thankful, to have him by your side.
Hello, so my ex and I broke up on weird terms. He’s very egoistic and prideful and jealous. He’s not one to show emotions and he’s not one to communicate when something bugs him. He leaves me in limbo. He’s the biggest mommas boy and I know there’s a huge disadvantage on my behalf because he lets his mom run his thoughts and controls him. He’s also the idiot that lets himself And doesn’t grow up.
my story: met a lousy guy on tinder who promised to pick the stars from the sky for me, we had a few dates and i have to advise all the women out there to be careful especially with guys who get affectionate,caring, and future-planning too soon because it’s a cheap hoax to get the woman into having sex and then dumping her cold-turkey.if they realise the woman won’t have sex with them(like me)they run off and find other ‘candidates’ to lie to.my guy ‘friend-zoned’me to keep me hanging on because he thought that maybe he could one day drag me into the sheets but i ended the whole thing on that creepy liar.additionally i caught him with a few other girls so please ladies:pay attention
#2 He lacks the skills to effectively communicate. If there is something on his mind or something that is bothering him and he doesn’t know how to express it to you, then he might start to push you away. The biggest problem in this situation is that he’s often unaware himself of what is going on, how to explain it, or how to fix it. Lacking in the capacity to express his feelings or needs, a man often decides that the whole thing is too much trouble and will retreat instead of dealing with it.

I was in a friends with benifits relationship and after a couple of months i told him i loved him i knew he didnt feel that way for me but i was ok with it . We spent alot of time together alot of sex and got on a rutine i would stay over night one day a week and we did dinner and drinks watch games etc i thought things were great. Then he needed space blew me off for the weekend and now barly talks to me he is 54 and in am 47 at our age we know what we want but i do love him and just dont know what to do i tried to talk to him and he just says he needs space.. do you think he is not coming back? Do you think hes scared ? I dont know what to do
It’s been 2 weeks since he broke up with me.and he made very clear that he don’t have any feelings left for me.and even if it does it’s all negativity about me in his mind and he don’t want me in any case.he never tried contacting me.we were together since 2 and half years.its a shocking for me.i love him even after his harsh words.his reason of break up is that we argue a lot and that’s true but I asked him to give me a chance but he isn’t ready .i am not in contact with him but nothing is changing.he seems really over me.its not the 1st time that he broke up with me but whenever he did ..he always initiated contacting me and asking for a chance and when this time I asked for a chance ..he is just not ready to give me. Please tell me what to do to make him come back to me?
I love your articles. Appreciate to help and advice my situation. I’m in relation with my boyfriends for 3 months. He’s start to talk about the future and marriage since our 3rd date. He was send me fill text everyday it’s made my heart fell full and in love with him so much and we start to have sex after 4th date. But since last months I few something changed after I asked him about the series relation between us, he’s send me a less of text, didn’t keep the date schedule. When I talked about get marriage he said we just know each other a few months. Now I’m move to other country and so worry about the long distance relation with him. He’s promised me will waiting to me and will come to visit me on Jan. But right now I got only one message from him a day someday it’s no text from him. I love him so much. How should I get him back.
Ok so I don’t know how to start. My boyfriend and I had a 5 year age gap. And I recently just had him end a relationship of 1 year and like 9 months. We met on Facebook through a mutual friend and talked for a couple weeks in the beginning of Dec. 2016 until his birthday in January of 2017. Three days after his birthday party he invited me back over to hangout with him and the female mutual friend (who I met through work, she was like his older sister, she told me. And his neighbor) Anyway it was just me and him hanging out for a few hours and by the end of the night he romantically asked me to be his girlfriend, because we talked for weeks before meeting and he wanted to exclusively see me and date. I said yes. Fast forward maybe a month or a couple months and things were going great. We hungout on weekends, he came into my work to see me right after he got out from work almost every other day. It was very sweet. We went to movies, we went to his friends & his parents and were doing all kinds of stuff. People I knew from work would come to his house and hangout, watch movies, play games etc. Then I finally confessed to my parents that I was staying at his house (basically living there, I stayed 3 or more nights with him.) Everythjng was exciting and fun & sweet. Fast forward a week maybe and he asked me to move in. I said yes and told my parents my decision. I’m a cluttery/messy person.. and he’s OCD. Anyway after we were together over a year he said that maybe we should break up. He said he loved me very much but the house was always a mess (and I was working a ton of late nights as a pharmacy tech & always studying so I was tired. ) He told me the house being dirty was depressing and things with our relationship weren’t as exciting as the beginning. I managed to ask him to give me another try, I promised to keep the house clean & to do more activities with him. For a few months things were great, we went to his friends almost every weekend. We enjoyed activities with his & my parents. And we still hungout with our mutual friend (his neighbor).i ended up quitting my job and we went to Florida for 2weeks. We stayed with his family along the way and I met everyone. That was this past april. Things were great. We even recently went to Wisconsin together for a family wedding. Then tragedy hit over 10 days ago. His parents had moved down south before April, and I knew he missed them a lot. He rarely spoke compared to his every day phone calls with them. They were always busy now. So he invited one of his best friends to stay for a week with us to kinda pick himself back up I guess. It created tensions between us. We went to get him downstate for the weekend and I don’t like doing things outdoors/active.. idk why. Anyway ever since then he stopped holding my hand & kissing me goodbye before work. He even stopped kissing me when he got home from work, he withdrew from me almost completely, and I’ve always been clingy. But I was coming up on 7 months with no work and money was tight so I blamed it on that. Long story short he broke up with me 10 days ago. He said we are two different people and he needs an active and clean/neat partner. And I need someone to motivate and wake me up when repetition happens because I can deal with the same thing everyday. But not him. So for the past 7 months I’ve been trying to sell soaps. And he hasn’t been exactly supportive. He doesn’t talk about it. We would fight because he wouldn’t say anything positive he just would say oh cool. But he wasn’t negative or thought it was stupid either, I got his mom into the hobby. I miss him now. I don’t know if he will ever comeback. I’m desparate.. I was with him for almost 2 years, so many memories, i moved in with him and left my family & friends behind. They lived 30 minutes from where we lived. Nobody ever visited because of distance. I was ready to marry him, and at one point he did too. But the day we broke up he said something was missing in his life and he needed time alone. I have so much I could say, but this is already too long. And I recently made an okcupid account and found he had reactivsted his old one. I am so depressed that he’s moving on already. He didn’t want to give me anymore chances to change and he didn’t want to fix things.. But he swore up and down he’s always supported and loved me. He said he still loves me but we don’t work. Somebody please reply, I’m losing my best friend and the man I love. I know couples can change & grow together in relationships, I just feel because he’s depressed and isolated from everybody hat he’s pushing me away too.. I can do but leave him alone because he doesn’t like to message me anymore. I had a new phone he persuaded me to get with him when he wanted one too, everything was contract & in his name. It was a hassle to get it switched back to me & make payments w/o a job. Same with my car insurance. We were looking at houses and everything. It was like overnight he changed..

When he talks about something that’s important to him, follow up with additional questions. Remember what he says. Even if it’s not an interest that you share, be willing to learn about it. Who knows, maybe it’ll end up becoming something you’re passionate about as well. If not, being receptive to it regardless will show him you care more about him than doing exactly what you want with every second of your day.
#1 Be fun and easy going. Guys are much less complicated than women, that much is for certain. They like things to be easy going and relaxed. Which means they don’t really want to commit to someone who’s going to add stress to their life. So be easy going and keep things light and fun. He’ll be much more willing to commit. [Read: 10 ways to prove that you’re girlfriend material]
When he talks about something that’s important to him, follow up with additional questions. Remember what he says. Even if it’s not an interest that you share, be willing to learn about it. Who knows, maybe it’ll end up becoming something you’re passionate about as well. If not, being receptive to it regardless will show him you care more about him than doing exactly what you want with every second of your day.
This article is mostly targeted to woman. So I ask a question on man side. I have lot of difficulties to start a new relation, because this give me anxiety. My ex that I was with for 7months decided to stop the relation. I totally understand her and I’m working on myself (therapy) to try to understand why I get these anxieties. Since we broke 4 weeks ago, we regularly see at beginning because we kept some feeling. She from time to time text me that she missed me. But since couple of day she is much colder in her message and when we cross each other. Would it make sense to start “Radio Silent” now ?
Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you the skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit gettingrelationshipsright.com for more resources to help your relationships.
If your man is pulling away after you two have gotten close, chances are that he’s not actually pulling away from you specifically. It’s more likely that he’s dealing with something in his life that’s dragging his attention and focus away from you – so to you it feels like he’s emotionally withdrawing, and to him it feels like he’s focusing on solving a problem. The best thing to do in this situation is always to play it cool and give him the chance to come back to you once he’s solved what’s bothering him.
Answer: Stop being so aggressive. The more you push, the more he is going to pull away. Give him some space to figure stuff out without all the questions and accusations. If you push him too far, you are going to lose him. If you take some of the pressure off, he may just find his way back to you. [Read: 20 glaring signs you have a control freak in you]

Trust your instincts from the very first contact with a potential boyfriend.  Did he get a little too drunk on your initial dates?  A man who can’t get through the early stages of a relationship without using alcohol may have substance abuse issues.  Is he perpetually late, always offering bogus excuses?  He doesn’t value your time so don’t expect him to suddenly be punctual when you need him to be somewhere important.  Do you get a sense he is hiding something when he finds reasons why you can never come to his place?  Key into your visceral responses when you pick up vibes that don’t sit right with you.  Don’t make the mistake so many women make, thinking that all these negative behaviors will change once he falls in love with you.  They won’t.  They may even get worse.
There’s a huge difference between being interested in the person you’re with and being obsessive/clingy. If you’re sending him 100 text messages a day asking where he’s at or why he’s not answering you, trying to see him every minute of every day, or going overboard to show him how much you care about when the relationship is fairly new, you might be pushing him away from you. Men don’t want a clingy lady. They want a woman who is secure and independent but still shows that she cares in a subtle and sensual way.
The last thing you want to have happen with a woman you want to pursue romantically is to fall into the friend zone. To avoid this, you need to prove that you’re the full package. Not only can she rely on you for emotional intimacy, but for physical intimacy as well. Holding doors, pulling out chairs, leaving her a card that she finds in the morning before leaving for work, telling her she’s beautiful, surprising her with a massage, and planning a date night are all ways to keep that romantic spark flaming. Imagine how turned on she would be if you called her in the middle of a random day and said, “Meet me at 8:00, I’ve planned something for you.”

What I dislike about the article is that it really does not give any insight on how we can actually show the man that we were hurt and neglected. Would men like it if we had a come-and-go attitude? Is it too much to ask to think about the other person before disappearing? I don’t get it why we should be so bothered to not show our feelings, I doubt that a man would be more committed and less neglectful if after days he disappeared we would be like “oh I’m do glad I’m hearing back from you” as if everything is just fine. How convenient. It might give him the impression you had no problem with the whole thing while, while you did. Now let me ask you something personal since you are a dude, what about a man that does not text for 10 days while you had established daily or every two days fb messenger communication – while he gets online everyday and has liked another girl’s photo in the meantime. No, the girl was not a friend. I got really pissed off that he never talked to me for so long especially because of that and I told him. I disconnected and I do regret the whole situation. Just so you have the background, he was a guy I was seeing last year, we were together for about 3 months and when he sensed it was time to be official he just bailed out due to his personal problems-and indeed he was not at his best. He also quickly became distant and I blocked him with no explanation (I don’t take it that he would appear and disappear to taste) and then when I was calmer I unblocked him (did not reconnect though) and I explained myself. After another half year he texted me that he felt e distant too and reconnected with me and we had a daily communication pattern but we had not talked on where we stand which also bothered me.

If you want this guy to be your boyfriend, you have to make him think that being in a relationship was all his idea. So remove all the pressure and stop stressing him out with your constant talks about being committed to each other. Soon enough, being with you will be the only thing on his mind, and he won’t even hesitant letting you know that he’s ready for a relationship.
Lastly, until your guy finally comes to his senses and realizes that you’re the girl from him, don’t stop dating other men. Keep your options open even if you’re not particularly interested in these other guys. If you keep your social calendar full of dates with others, you will be less worried about what your guy is doing, and you won’t be so preoccupied with things moving from casual into a committed relationship.

My boyfriend has a small company “hobby” and seems to spend a lot of time and effort into that. When I try to talk to him he ignores me even when I leave him alone for hours. He seems to be more interested in his “hobby” than listening or just telling me how his day went. I don’t pry at all but after work of not talking to him all day all he wants to do is his “hobby” I don’t feel valued right now and just wanted to vent about it really.
Of course, the best thing that will be missed by guys are the extraordinary love and care that their girlfriends are giving them. If you really want your boyfriend to miss you deeply, then make him fall in love with you deeply. Always give him your tender loving care. Make him happy when he’s sad, be at his side when he needs support, nurse him when he’s sick, understand him when he makes mistakes, be faithful to him, and love him for who he really is.

How you feel with the person you’re with is the best indication of whether you’re with someone who’s compatible or not. How much you want it to work is the worst indicator of a good relationship (in fact, usually the people who tell me how desperately they want something to work are highlighting how incompatible they really are from their partner).

Forget all those relationship expert columns that tell you it’s most important to your man that he first see what’s in your heart. Bull****. It’s most important to see what’s inside your clothes. Now, before you scream, “Piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig!” listen carefully. I’m not saying that we need to get into your pants right away in order to enjoy your company. But I am saying that men definitely need to know that you have the goods and that you take care of yourself. To put it bluntly, a guy’s first interest in a woman has nothing to do with the handbag she’s carrying or that she graduated from an Ivy League school. What your (potential) man wants you to know but won’t tell you is that his initial attraction is all about your appearance and physical being, which sends a flood of highly charged testosterone racing through his veins. Yes, the physical is first, and we’re not saying we won’t eventually fall in love with your intelligence, kindness, and humor. These extremely important attributes are the ones that will ultimately be critical in helping you hook us. But in the beginning the number-one attribute is what you look like and how well you take care of yourself.
If your man is pulling away after you two have gotten close, chances are that he’s not actually pulling away from you specifically. It’s more likely that he’s dealing with something in his life that’s dragging his attention and focus away from you – so to you it feels like he’s emotionally withdrawing, and to him it feels like he’s focusing on solving a problem. The best thing to do in this situation is always to play it cool and give him the chance to come back to you once he’s solved what’s bothering him.
Now that you have your new and improved wardrobe on deck, it’s time to switch up your appearance even further. We definitely vote against you chopping off your hair or doing anything drastic that you may regret later. Instead, try out a new hair color that will really make you stand out. Switching up your hair is the equivalent to changing up your wardrobe. You’re drawing attention to yourself by changing up your look, and we guarantee it will leave your ex drooling! If you’ve always rocked the same hair color, try spicing things up, like with a balayage hair color treatment. This French hair color technique works on a variety of hair lengths, colors and textures - making it a flattering option for all women. Don’t be surprised if your ex doesn’t recognize you at first, but when he does, he will be floored...and maybe even a little turned on!

I have been seeing a guy for just about a year. His job is giving him a lot of stress and he became much more distant. For a whole year, he never missed a good morning or night text. We never texted all day long as we are both busy but that one morning text we sent each other was just enough to let us both know we were thinking of one another. His stopped pretty abruptly. My initial reaction was to panic and I did in a way but didn’t let him see that. Last weekend he apologized for not texting me so much but to trust that he still loves me. I was a bit stumped because I never once verbalized anything about the non texting issue, so I wondered why he would say that. I asked him if he would prefer me not text him at all during the week ( which I never did anyway, only one morning text and maybe a “have a good afternoon”) and he said yes, unless it was important.
Similarly, Ive seen my brother go through something similar. He did the exact thing with his current girlfriend, he moved out for a week to retreat after a minor conflict, and she was so upset, leaving presents at the door and calling me to find out if he was ok etc. I had to tell her to stop and give him space. He came around, I didnt pressure him and didnt go into it much. But the up side is that he’s still with her now.
When you’re in a relationship and things are going well, you want to know whether it has a future. You’ve probably been dating a while, but you’ve found yourself in a sticky conundrum. You want to push things forward, but you’re unsure if your guy wants the same. Some men aren’t ready for that level of commitment, and some men will never be ready. I’ve known women who have dated men for eight, even ten years, waiting and waiting for him to propose. Much to their disappointment, they find out that he enjoyed the current setup they have and doesn’t want things to change.
End the conversation first. Start hanging up the phone or ending the text conversation before he does, especially if you’re usually the last to say goodbye. Being the first to end the conversation will leave him wanting more, and keep you on his mind until he talks to you again. This longing for more communication will start to drive him wild with his desire to talk to you.[3]

Out of sight, out of mind. I don't know who instanced this one, but he who did, perhaps, knew how relationships would take a turn as time sweeps. Given the current rundown of relationships, it really isn't a tough call to see yours dragged into the rut of being taken for granted by your boyfriend quite frequently. He might start thinking that deep down under, you're not going anywhere, and that this relationship, is secure, whichever way it is. The end result? He won over you, and you lost to him, or so you both think. However, now, take that big step, go backstage, and make yourself unavailable for a while. Let him find you by himself. Don't make yourself seen. The following ways might come handy.
Long story short, this article helped put things in perspective again. I’m going to try my Damndest to give him space when he seems to pull away, play the cool understanding girl a little while longer, & endure. I do love him with every ounce of my heart & soul. I have always been a very confident person & have NEVER let anyone “treat me” this way. But, I’ve also never loved someone so deeply nor with this personality type before.

He may have feelings for you. He probably has very strong feelings for you. He likely is concerned that if the two of you develop a relationship at this time, that he will not act in a mature enough manner and may damage your friendship. If you want to move into a relationship with him, then explain that you know that the both of you care about each other and you are not going to hurt him. Let him know that you trust him not to hurt you. Best of luck, Vicki!
So you’ve just met a great guy who you feel like you have a great connection with. He’s attractive, smart and fits into your definition of “tall, dark and handsome.” You’ve probably been speaking with him for a while, but you’ve noticed something quite strange about him—the time it takes for him to respond to your messages and return your calls doubles with every interaction.

Now you might be wondering, how can I fix this and undo the damage? The answer is the same as above, just pull back, give him space, and focus on yourself. Working overtime trying to undo the damage caused by acting needy is still you acting needy. It’s you being desperate for his approval and for his love and affection. Guys hate feeling that sort of pressure from a woman, the feeling that they need to be a certain way or she will get upset.
Don’t be confused by the earlier advice to not be overly available. By resisting the urge to jump for your phone the second he texts, you let a guy know not to take you for granted. That’s not the same as trying to make him view you as some magical being impossible to keep track of. When you value the rest of your life instead of constantly obsessing over your crush, you automatically become more desirable. This is genuine instead of manipulative, and eventually, a guy will pick up on which one you’re doing.
Had a break up of after about 6 years. Nothing horrible just was because of stress and no communication. He was amazing though. He broke up with me and the whole time it seemed I was the one trying to fix things. Suggest options to help us. Basically it didn’t work I was even more sad trying and him not . We kept trying a few things here and there but it didn’t work. It’s just he never suggested anything so idk maybe he really didn’t know. But we eventually ended it all 100%. I’d been trying to have fun not worry or stress and be a better me than I was. Fix things and be happy worry about me. I have met some new friends too buts it’s just friends. If I had a picture of a guys friend on social media with me is that bad? I was not trying to do anything wrong or cause any upset I was just having fun is all, it was just a goofy picture that has an inside story of how I’m ditzy. Hahaa that is all. I’m just making friends and having fun. But is that something I shouldn’t have done? If it was vice versa I’d be upset and wonder but I’d try to not assume something I don’t know unless there are more pictures of that person or it looked like they were together.

In general, just find something to do and just keep yourself busy. Apart from being the most productive solution to your problem, this will help you catch up on stuff that you have been procrastinating about for a long time. We all have those projects and responsibilities we have been putting off for another day, and with your boyfriend gone, you have the time to finish what you've started.


Hi Adam, am from Nigeria, i have being talking to a guy i met on dating app for some days now he seems really good & we talked alot he lives in USA but promise to visit me soon in my country i really like him, but there’s something wired about him, not up to 5days we met he talks about sex & how he want us to make babies together for me i think is too early to say such things i feel his faking it, now i always text him first before we start a conversation though his a busy bussinnes man, i want to stop being the one to start the conversation first, what do you think. I don’t want to lose him either, i don’t know what to do.

This is an important point to mention, because men who persist in overtly negative behavior in your presence are antagonizing you. They’re testing you to see whether you will tolerate being taken for granted or if you’re going to call them on it. A woman of class and self-respect WILL walk away, because she’s not interested in any man that gives her less than 100% of his full attention.
I was with my GF for almost 6 yrs she’s 21 I’m 23, i was planning on proposing next yr after she graduated college, I’m not in college i work so our time line is a bit off, we’ve both have hurt each other before but we always seemed to patch it up and stuff and i really do feel like i Love her and she’s the one and she’s told me before that she wants to marry me and stuff. Point is she asked for a break up about 2 weeks ago saying they’re was plenty from her party missing and that she can’t have me going 100% and her giving 50% i get it we got to together when she was 16 and i was 18 so we are all we e known, she also is very stressed with school and said she wants to handle her time better and she wants to work on herself and me being in Love I’m hurt i mean i understand but I’m hurt, I’ll admit i haven’t been the best bf but the last couple of yrs I’ve been the absolute best I’m so considerate I’m so nice I’m so focused on her needs but i guess that’s not enough for her to want some space becuase she says she needs to work on herself. I’m trying to do the no contact thing i try i go 2 days and bam i call her i don’t cry but i do tell her that i miss her and she’s says she misses me too but that she stands by the break up and that she wants space. I know i should just give her space maybe to finish out her school and graduate and maybe if she still has love for me after maybe try it again? It just sucks becuase she is my Bestfriend and i do everything with her but i know that she wants to do stuff without me and maybe is just tired of having to answer to somebody which i get and i know i have to work on myself i get it becuase woman want a strong men a guy who doesn’t break when things get down and wants a confident guy which i know i can be better at.

If you’re missing him, odds are he’s used to you fawning over him. Switch things up when you see him and treat him like a good friend instead of the man who’s keeping your mind occupied all of the time. Hold back the feelings you have for him even thought it may be difficult. Be polite, courteous, and not flirtatious before saying goodbye during your chance encounter. This is more effective if you have another man by your side. When he realizes he doesn’t have a hold on you, then the wheels will start turning and you'll be on his mind. Of course, this may also backfire and get him to think that you’re not interested in him so practice discretion when going this route. If he’s sensitive and this could hurt him emotionally it’s best to keep other guys at a distance, try the other options listed.
#7 He has low self-esteem. If you’ve been together for a while and things have not gone financially the way that he thought they would, he may be feeling inadequate. When a man feels like he can’t provide the way that he wants to, the pressure of being with someone he loves can become overwhelming. Transferring his feelings of inadequacy to you, he may unwittingly be pulling away due to his own feelings of inadequacy, blaming you for his failures.
I’ve been dating my ex for last 2 years he was a married man and I’m a single mom …we worked together and he asked me out we share each other’s feelings he told me how his marriage that is not working with his wife he has no feelings for her she does not want family she does not want kids she does not want to be intimate with him at all he asked me out and I said yes why not give it a try since then our relationship been good but yet he was living with her he tried his best to communicate with me as much as possible after 1 and 1/2 years I always try to make him move out of the house if he does not want to be with her make a decision if he is happy with her he can be with her and break up with me. every time I tell him to break up with me he cries and he says he does not want to break up with me because he is only happy with me want to be with me he needs me he promised he’s not intimate with her he’s only intimate with me. We work together we lost our job because we were in a relationship he did not care he Risked his job I risked my job to stay together even after losing the job we stayed together we still love each other the same I thought he will break up with me after losing the job but we knew the consequences when we first started dating we still did not care. Being a single mama has so much responsibility he helped me in many ways co-signing to my apartment co-signing to get me a credit card with his credit. Taking care of my child loving my child giving my child the love of a father everything he did was so perfect. We always talk about future having babies having a house we plan to meet my family we go on vacation thanks so much we seen so much as speech for future. He. agree to move out but when time came he had excuse he could not move out to which i said okay let’s be patience and he will move out. I know he cares about her he did tell me he cares about her a lot and he wants to make sure that she is okay before he moves out. Last Friday he plan to move out but when the date came he says he does not want to move out now he wants to make sure she’s okay before he moves out I was very upset I wanted to break up with him but he cried and he said he needs me he does not want to break up he just needs a little more time which I said I did cannot give no more time I have been patient for last 2 years that’s it today either he choose me or choose her. After 3 hours of arguing and crying he moved out with me. Because I wanted to break. Well on my way home he promised to always stay by my side and he loves me a lot now I don’t have to worry about anything he’s there for us . then the same night she’s been calling he text her and told her he moved out and he will file for divorce to which she said she would like to meet him once and sit down and talk like adults. He said okay he will mert the next day . He told me he will go see her I said okay could go see her. now I regret I shouldn’t have let him go. I don’t know what happened when he went to meet her in 2 hours he came back pick me up from work came home and told me he needs to talk to me and he said he’s moving back in with her he think he should give her another chance. , after begging him to stay not to do this think about it again he still did not stay he left. Next day his wife message me telling me to stay away from him and her and that she will never come back to me and my child. So I told her everything and I asked her if she was intimate with him for last 3 years cuz he told me he was never and she laughs and says that’s what he told you oh my God and then she says how could he think of having a future with you and your child if I don’t sign off the divorce paper. And he has to give me money half of his income every month. That tells me clearly that she blackmailed him emotionally whichever way to money which made him make that decision. She took his phone away from him and changed his number I called him at his work and I asked him what’s going on he needs to talk to me and give me a proper explanation to this break up and walk away he just told me not to call him it’s done between us he does not want to see me or talk to me.
I read your article and found it useful as this was my first serious relationship and he has decided to ended by ghosting (he did however tried to end it before and pleaded to give us a chance) after texting him concerned about why he is not answering and that was a week after me not contacting him he calls me ending it anws I pleaded for him to come by tmrw so we can talk I wasn’t sure he was going thru it and I ended up going through binge drinking to the extent he came by and saw me all drunk and vunrable he left shortly (I do not remember that much) and ended calling him once and texting him a huge message about admitting what we had was real
If you still communicate with your ex-boyfriend, you have many opportunities to make him miss you! Whether the two of you chat on the phone or exchange text messages every few days, in order to make him miss you, you need to tell him just how fabulous your day has been! After a break up, guys expect you to crawl into a hole and cry your eyes out for the next few months. But even if you’re feeling like your world is falling apart, you have to give the impression that everything is going awesome in your world. You should be happy and always telling him about the positive things that are going on in your life. Since you’re not acting the way a typical girl would act after the end of a relationship, it will draw him closer to you. Your spunky and upbeat attitude will remind him just how much fun you are, and he will be dying to be a part of your life once again.

3. Don’t give him all the “girlfriend privileges” before he’s calling you his girlfriend. This includes sleepovers (whether you have sex or not) and having sex. The reason you have to be careful not to give a guy you’re dating “girlfriend privileges” before you’re in a committed relationship is because he’s going to think to himself, “Why should I be in a committed relationship if I can get all the things I want while still being single?!” There’s nothing worse than a man who gets girlfriend privileges without having to take boyfriend responsibility. Chew on that one for a while and make a conscious choice about how you want to proceed. If you need to reference the old school phrase “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?” well then, reference away. When it comes to committing to women, men report that it absolutely has to be the right woman at the right time. But if you can help him realize why he would want to commit to you by associating the utmost pleasure and positive feelings with a relationship, you’ll be headed in the right direction.

I’ve just broken up with him and….we still live together! How am I supposed to not stay in touch etc if we share a house? We have issues and we both need time to tackle them separately. We feel there is a chance for us to be together in the future but if we were to stay together right now, things would go very bad… So, in order to salvage the feelings and fondness we had before the problem cropped up, we’ve decided to separate. BUT we live together…!!! How can I make him miss me if we’re flatmates? :/
So I took the initiative of stopping by before he was to leave for work the next morning, me being pressed. We kinda talked but it reverted to me acting crazy and being accused of starting the altercation. He said doesn’t want the relationship anymore and we can just be friends. I was then n am now hurt. I shed a few tears . I asked if I could have a kiss since our 1yr relationship was over n he said no. He then said I’ll kiss your cheek. I opted for it and after asked if I could kiss his cheek back. He agreed and as I reached for his cheek the damn water works shot out like a lightning vult. I then grabbed his whole face while hugn, kissn, and cryn on his cheek, he proceeded to turn and kiss me and it felt like a rebirth. I then stated to just leave and head to work while I walked away. Heeeelp
Wow, the anger. No wonder you may be having relationship issues. It has nothing to do with lying or hiding true feelings. It’s about letting a guy have his space. If you come after me saying how horrible I am etc. etc. I will NEVER want to see you again. Nobody likes that kind of women, and no man wants to date his mother. Also pulling away is not “bad behavior.” Would you rather he spend time with you but verbally and physically abuse you? Bad behavior is if the guy is rude and abusive and mean, etc. Pulling away is a man’s way of saying “Look, I like you a lot, but I really need some time and space to sort things out.” If you can’t accept that not everything is rosy and happy all the time, and that if the man you “love” needs to pull away and you just bark and say “you’re behaving badly,” then you have no reason to be in a relationship.
It’s been 2 weeks since he broke up with me.and he made very clear that he don’t have any feelings left for me.and even if it does it’s all negativity about me in his mind and he don’t want me in any case.he never tried contacting me.we were together since 2 and half years.its a shocking for me.i love him even after his harsh words.his reason of break up is that we argue a lot and that’s true but I asked him to give me a chance but he isn’t ready .i am not in contact with him but nothing is changing.he seems really over me.its not the 1st time that he broke up with me but whenever he did ..he always initiated contacting me and asking for a chance and when this time I asked for a chance ..he is just not ready to give me. Please tell me what to do to make him come back to me?
I need help. I absolutely love this blog because it gives me hope. My situation I feel is a tad more delicate. My (ex) and I were dating for about 2 years prior and though we had our ups and downs we always came out of them. I moved away due to (life) but I planned on coming back for him. In the process of living somewhere else I lost myself and I dropped off the face of the earth to and for him. I mean it, I stopped talking, calling, texting you name it. He would call and I would just ignore. I never actually “broke up with him”. 6 months went by and I gave him a ring, decided to contact him, I didn’t think it was that terrible at the time as we always got over things and although he reached out back to me I could tell things were different. He as more distant and recently told me it aaa because I had hurt him and he is nervous about my intentions now. I have done the routine spill out my heart to him, swear up and down I would never make this mistake again as I often have done this before just to people because well I’m not perfect and obviously an idiot dealing with issues the wrong way. Anyway, I don’t want to loose this guy. He means so much to me, I feel like if we fixed things we would make it out even stronger. What do I do in this scenario? We’ve talked and he’s told me he doesn’t know what he wants at the moment because I left for so long he got used to me not being around and now that I’m back it’s going to take time getting used too. He’s also said he’s not sure of his feelings about me but he also doesn’t want to just say goodbye because he’s not sure if that is what he wants as well. He wants me to take it day by day and just see how things play out. He is at least honest and says he knows it’s not fair to me so if I wanted to walk away he would understand. I don’t want to walk away. I want to get him back. I’m not sure of the outcome and I’m really freaking scared. Some outside advice please. From anyone. Thoughts?
I was in a friends with benifits relationship and after a couple of months i told him i loved him i knew he didnt feel that way for me but i was ok with it . We spent alot of time together alot of sex and got on a rutine i would stay over night one day a week and we did dinner and drinks watch games etc i thought things were great. Then he needed space blew me off for the weekend and now barly talks to me he is 54 and in am 47 at our age we know what we want but i do love him and just dont know what to do i tried to talk to him and he just says he needs space.. do you think he is not coming back? Do you think hes scared ? I dont know what to do
I and my fiance separated after two years because of the many problems between us .. But the last problem was big and did not talk to me and I did not speak to him three months ago, and his father convinces him to return but he refuses to .. I knew that from the people around .. Is there a chance to return? How can I?, I am 16 and he is 26 years old
As a side note, expect that he is going to want to go out and do his own thing too. That’s a positive thing! When he is out in the world without you, it gives him a chance to miss you and the comfortable and close relationship that you have. He may find himself around people who he doesn’t like as much as you, which is a huge bonus for you. Or, he may find himself around people that he doesn’t click with as much as you, which is also a huge bonus for you when it comes to him missing you. And, if he does have fun and enjoy the people he is with, then it still creates some distance from you and gives him a chance to miss you.

I might feel a bit regret for loving him that i feel heartbroken now..But whatever it is, the days we spent together was really one of the happiest moment in my life so i never regretted every moment of it. Bad news is, i find it hard to move on.. like seriously am i obsessed with him now? it feels like hopes are there you know, and its not giving up. i just wanted to talk to him. A single hey from him would make my year, but it seems like impossible. *sigh* life…

Many articles on how to get a man to commit tell you to make him laugh, and do fun stuff with him. If you think your man is funny, laugh. If he has achievements, great or small, congratulate him. The phrase that says encouragement sweetens labor can be edequately applied to relationships. Show him that you appreciate his sense of humor, and he will not only feel as the center of attention, but the center of your world; ensure that he always know that you appreciate him. That is one of the ways how to make a man commit and create an unbreakable bond with you. You will become his number one girl, and you showing appreciation and genuine interest in him is what makes him want to commit.


Without even realizing it, he’ll see how great being in a committed relationship is. It’s even better if you talk about it but you need to be careful. Instead of saying things like, “anything for my boyfriend.” Say something along the lines of, “I’ll do anything for someone I care so much about.” It’s less scary and proves to him that you really do care. [Read: 9 relationship stages all couples go through]
Now, I’m bit bummed because I can’t seem to find any advice about the opposite situation: what if the guy is showing you more commitment than you can handle? Not in a creepy first-date-“let’s marry and have babies”, but in a solid 3-months-“I care about you and want to see where this is going, and I’d like to move in together and five it a try”. I want that too, just… not for another year or so (it’s actually a LD relationship, I put the details in a recent forum post called “Anxious about playing house”). Any advice? :)

If you’re a woman and have any questions to ask, unsure in regards to your partner, insecure, upset or worried about something, please, share it in this relationship advice for women board and the community can advise and provide caring advice to help you combat your relationship issues. If you aren’t a woman, and you’re a bloke, then we would recommend that you post in our relationship advice for men forum board, you’ll receive better answers there.


As you’ve probably already realized, men and women are different. There’s no getting around it. And on top of that, every woman is different in her own right as well. That’s why some of the best relationship advice for men is about how to make sure the unique needs of the woman you’re with are addressed by the way you treat her. If you’re looking for something fulfilling and meaningful, the key is understanding what the woman in your life really wants. Once you understand that, you can create the satisfying relationship you both want.
I listen to your Video. ..How to Make Him miss you. I really wish I would have listen to your video before hand I did everything wrong because I wasnt aware. Well low and behold he broke up with me and it hurt pretty badly for 4months. I can see in his eyes it hurt him to do that. We both had strong feelings for each other and the Love making was on the top of the chart. Ive learned alot from now to then. He’s back in my Life and I truly Love him as if he never left were able to pick up from where we left off. I want this to work with him forever. I want him to be my last relationship.
While it may be easier for you to be vague with your partner, not open up to this person about your past, and keep yourself from feeling vulnerable, being able to have mutual trust with your partner is absolutely imperative in a relationship. When you're reliable, can count on each other, and have each other's best interests at heart, you're laying the groundwork for a meaningful and long-lasting connection.

Don’t fall in love with your man for his potential.  You want to bond with someone as they are now.  Sure, all signs point to him becoming successful and hard-working, but what if something occurs, like illness or disability, that would prevent that from happening?  Would you still love him?  Your man is not your project, so make sure you pick someone who you love just the way he is.
Though it can be difficult to ask a man what he is looking for, it also challenges you to get one step closer to your goal. The more comfortable you are with this the easier it will become. I know that some people may not always take my advice to challenge themselves and ask the man what he is looking for, so I want to give you some other clues on what to pay attention to if you don’t want to have this conversation with him. Side note, I am in no way I offering you a pass to wiggle out of the conversation! Remember, challenge yourself.
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