Wow, I really liked some of your advice. I know most of that, but I really needed to hear it again. I'm not doing a great job at being unattached and being independent. lol. I put drinking glasses around the house over our bugs to let him kill them when he gets home. lol. I guess I should suck it up and pick them up and not be such a needy baby about that. Heck, I've done it before. Just not my favorite chore. Thanks for the encouragement!


Hello, me and my ex have been dating 2 years and we broke up on January 2. We had the no talking thing and he came back to to texting me. We still sleep together and hang out during entire weekends. When we see each other, he hugs me, wants me to hold his hand/arm in public, cuddles me and says I’m pretty and that he misses me and does think about me often. How I’m going and how I’m feeling. Now he’s talking to a new girl from work and he’s talking with her hours on end at times. She’s his type and it’s so hard to see. I still love him and the way he’s acting around me is hard and confusing. He seems so confused. That was an issue when we were about to break up ( in December). He said he was confused and didn’t know what he wanted. He still seems to be confused. I don’t know what to do anymore.
It's easy to let parts of yourself go when you meet someone you think is the partner of your dreams. But don't. "Trying to be someone you're not is so transparent," Kelman says. If you'd rather go to the gynecologist than watch football or hit an art museum, don't pretend to love the Steelers or understand abstract art just because the person you're seeing is a fan.
I have been in love with a guy for over ten years now and we both love each other, all of a sudden he started seeing another girl and when I confronted him about that he told me it’s true that he’s seeking another girl but he didn’t mean to and he’s madly in love with her. So I told him that we should quit but he said no that he still want to marry me. I don’t know but I think he want to marry me out of petty. I’m confused cos I love him, please l need ur help.
We were a great couple. We have four children. We were very good friends and were married for 19 years. At some point I was diagnosed with depression. He became distant, We stopped having sex and after two years he said he wanted to move out, but work on our marriage. We went to therapy but it was not working. He filed for divorce but was saying we will get closer and maybe marry again. We saw each other all the time, went to dates, etc. I trusted him and was sure that we would fix our problems. He was saying, even if we won’t get married again, we always would be together, grow old together and so on. He was maintaining that he was not thinking about anybody. Then, after final papers of divorce arrived, he said he met somebody a month before and wanted to be with her. I was devastated and suspect that he started an affair a long time ago, but don’t know for sure. He wanted to stay friend, but I am not in contact with him unless about things related to kids. He pretty immediately started telling people that his new girlfriend, who is 20 years younger than him and is pretty ugly, will move in with him. When people ask him what he likes about her, he says she is a good manager (at work) and has a good CV. Can this be really that serious?
What do I do to get him back!?!? I know we can work on things but I dont know How to get him to understand. I keep reading not to contact himbut its so hard and I want to reply to his text explaining why we could work out but don’t know if I should. He leaves for 10 days out of country next week so I dont know if I should contact him before or after :\
Hi Adam, am from Nigeria, i have being talking to a guy i met on dating app for some days now he seems really good & we talked alot he lives in USA but promise to visit me soon in my country i really like him, but there’s something wired about him, not up to 5days we met he talks about sex & how he want us to make babies together for me i think is too early to say such things i feel his faking it, now i always text him first before we start a conversation though his a busy bussinnes man, i want to stop being the one to start the conversation first, what do you think. I don’t want to lose him either, i don’t know what to do.
Women have an innate desire to be heard and understood. They want a partner who will listen to them without judgment and who will create an environment where they feel comfortable expressing vulnerability. Some of the best relationship advice for men is learning to master the skill of empathy. There are many ways to be empathetic, which include active listening, suspending any judgment or preconceived notions you may have about a given situation and putting yourself in her shoes, and showing positive body language to let her know that you’re engaged in the conversation.
I'm not saying that men are right in pulling away, they also need to acknowledge the part they play in bringing out the worst side of a woman's fears. But just for your sake, for the sake of your mental and emotional health, just let go… anyway this is not the time to be having "talks" about the relationship because he'll most likely be unable (or unwilling) to have such deep convos during such a time.

Hey Mary, I am going through the same thing. I’ve been with my boyfriend for almost three years (three years this upcoming May), and he tore my heart into shreds because he’s not “happy” and like you said- doesn’t know who he is anymore. We are on the same boat. If you ever need someone to talk to, just reply and I will give you my email address. Good luck. Xx.
My ex broke up with me about two weeks ago out of the blue. I felt so blindsided because I thought everything was going extremely well and didn’t sense that anything was bothering him. He said he really liked me but wasn’t so sure about the future. Haven’t reached out to him at all and he hasn’t either. Idk what to think because I thought he really cared about me. I keep hoping he’ll text me to say that he made a mistake. What should I do?
Treat your boyfriend. Find a way to surprise and treat your boyfriend now and then. Prepare his favorite meal, give him a massage, or allow him time to focus on his own hobbies or passions. This will show him how generous and loving you can be. Doing things he enjoys can be a good reminder that your relationship is valuable and he will miss good treatment from you when you are away.
Step 2) Post a picture of you having a good time. Instead of him getting the comfort of knowing you are depressed without him in your life, show him you are still out and enjoying life without him needing to be in it. As I have mentioned many times in many articles, men are attracted to happy women. Not only that, he will want you more because he is going to be slightly upset at how un-upset you are. This is human instinct. He is going to want you to miss him, which will in turn make him start to miss you. Remember how having fun is part of this phase? Post a good picture of it!
If unfriending and blocking your ex from your social media accounts seems a little too harsh, you can still use your online profiles to make him miss you. Remember how we discussed how social media gives your followers a peek into your everyday life? Well, when it comes to making your ex miss you, and to successfully bring him back into your life, you will need to put your profiles into overdrive. Document everything, from the mundane to the extravagant. Every time he opens his social media apps, he should receive a new notification on how awesome your life is. Going to Starbucks for lunch? Snap a photo of your drink. Attending your BFF”s little cousin’s 1st birthday party? Post an Instagram video of yourself taking a swing at the piñata. The key is to make your life look as full, robust and as exciting as possible. If you’re doing anything other than siting at home nursing your broken heart, your ex will instinctively start to miss you. He will wonder how you moved on so fast, and he’ll be dying to get back together again.
Answer: You can’t make someone be at the same place as you. The only thing you can do is give him the space he needs to figure out if he wants to join you or move on. Let him go and figure things out, and if he is ready to move forward with you, he’ll let you know. Pushing him is only going to drive him farther away and will make him think you aren’t the one. [Read: The 10 best kept secrets to making a man commit to you]
I read your article and found it useful as this was my first serious relationship and he has decided to ended by ghosting (he did however tried to end it before and pleaded to give us a chance) after texting him concerned about why he is not answering and that was a week after me not contacting him he calls me ending it anws I pleaded for him to come by tmrw so we can talk I wasn’t sure he was going thru it and I ended up going through binge drinking to the extent he came by and saw me all drunk and vunrable he left shortly (I do not remember that much) and ended calling him once and texting him a huge message about admitting what we had was real
We're fully aware that both men and women can be problematic in a relationship, however, some may consider men to be more of a nuisance than women, if that's the case for you, and you're a woman seeking advice on your current dating situation, this relationship advice for women forum is a good place to start. Whether your man isn't pleasing you enough, he's causing problems or you think he's cheating, this is the best place to get some tips and guidance. If you're a male that's looking for advice, then we would suggest posting in our relationship advice for men board instead.
This particular relationship advice is for women exclusively. Big mistake women make is thinking that their man can read their thoughts and should “just know” when they are angry, hungry, tired or upset about something that happened at work.  Even the most intuitive man cannot know what’s inside your head.  Use your communication skills to express your feelings.  It will make everything easier and you won’t end up harboring resentment because your man had no idea you wanted him to pick up pasta for dinner instead of pizza.  

According to Chapman, once you know your partner’s love language you can then express love to your partner in the way that she is most receptive to it. Sometimes partners have a difficult time feeling loved by one another because the way they express love is different, so understanding what it is can give you the tools you need to ensure she feels loved by you.

You guys fell in love for a reason, and while there are multiple reasons for your love, one of the biggest factors will be your personality. Show him what he’s missing by having fun and being yourself. We don’t mean go out and have fun without him, it’s more about making him realize why he loved you in the first place. By showing him the different sides to your personality you will allow him to come to his senses and tell you how much he misses you and can’t wait to see you.
Whether you’ve just been dumped or you just broke up with your boyfriend, you’re probably having second thoughts about the relationship coming to an end. Maybe you now realize the part you played in your relationship crashing and burning, or perhaps you dumped your guy for a petty reason that you now regret. It’s not always as simple as picking up the phone and spilling out your guts to him. As a matter of fact, that’s probably the worst thing to do if you really want your ex back.
Studies of long-term, committed couples show that there are almost always ups and down in the phases of a relationship. Starting out with a positive attitude and trying to negotiate differences are good ways to seek and maintain a relationship balance. From the research of Marcel Zentner of the University of Geneva, we learn that "Men and women who continue to maintain that their partner is attractive, funny, kind, and ideal for them in just about every way remain content with each other." Put another way, they are matched ideals. In addition, they are able to maintain positive illusions.3

am reading your discussion on how important it is to keep in touch after a long distance breakup…but it seems my boyfriend sometimes is interested in conversations and will write quite a lot, then sometimes he is one worded and/or doesn’t even reply anymore. He tells me he is here always when I need him and wishes me the best, etc, and numerous times he has asked me if we broke up if it’s possible for us to stay in contact and be friends and I said over time maybe, but that I don’t know, but now that we have broken up I miss him and it’s been one month. We are both from the same city and then we both moved to the east coast for college and stayed together a year and a half, but started falling into communication failures and distance. We have generally been very good at fixing our problems, but this summer we both were in the same city for two months, it was wonderful, then I left for a month to a different country and it started to happen again where we lost touch and communication became worse to the point where I would express my deep sadness and emotions about not being happy and all the things I felt were wrong in our relationship. He wanted to fix it and admitted he felt the same and wanted to rekindle the spark, but then the last week before I came he became distant again and then I got back and we talked, cried and broke up. We said let’s give each other a few days to think it through, but then we broke up. I regret losing him and I have followed all the steps and methods and in your videos. The ones about writing bullet points on what went wrong, his views, etc and I still feel lost, but I have come to terms with a lot of things I did wrong. He owed me money from a previous trip we went on and I was a bit rude about it and I feel it somewhat ruined the relationship after the break up, but then we started to slowly talk and I asked his opinion on something, he was kind, but stopped anwering. I’m not sure what else to do. I am now back in the city I study in and he is still home, but will be back soon, 3 hours away.
We were a great couple. We have four children. We were very good friends and were married for 19 years. At some point I was diagnosed with depression. He became distant, We stopped having sex and after two years he said he wanted to move out, but work on our marriage. We went to therapy but it was not working. He filed for divorce but was saying we will get closer and maybe marry again. We saw each other all the time, went to dates, etc. I trusted him and was sure that we would fix our problems. He was saying, even if we won’t get married again, we always would be together, grow old together and so on. He was maintaining that he was not thinking about anybody. Then, after final papers of divorce arrived, he said he met somebody a month before and wanted to be with her. I was devastated and suspect that he started an affair a long time ago, but don’t know for sure. He wanted to stay friend, but I am not in contact with him unless about things related to kids. He pretty immediately started telling people that his new girlfriend, who is 20 years younger than him and is pretty ugly, will move in with him. When people ask him what he likes about her, he says she is a good manager (at work) and has a good CV. Can this be really that serious?
Men like to take lead and solve problems. They like to keep their personal problems with themselves and try to find a solution. If your boyfriend is acting distant, he may be having a personal problem and trying to find a solution on his own. Once he solves the problem, he will come back to you. There is nothing to worry about because he is not running away from you. It would be wise to give him some space and let him figure out what to do next. It is strongly advised to avoid putting pressure on him for spending time with you. This can make things worse and push him away from you because if you keep putting pressure on him, he might feel like you are self-involved and don’t realize that he may be having some personal issues. When the time is right and everything gets back to normal, he might tell you the reason why he was acting distant.
8 months now, we normally live together but he’s away sometimes to take care of the kids for like a week every month which no problem for me. He agreed that moving back to that location is good for the kids education but for her he’s not sure. However, my concern is that he now has to be away to that new location that his ex and kids will move to (it’s also his hometown), to help on finding the apartment and prepare for schooling.
In a relationship, we get into a routine. We leave the house at a certain time in the morning and come back together at a certain time. Rarely do we go off our schedules, so we expect our partner to come back at the time they said they would. While you don’t want to not show up when you are supposed to all the time, doing it once in a while can help remind him of how much he likes being around you and it is a great tip on how to make him miss you.
Português: Fazer Ele Sentir Sua Falta, Español: hacer que él te extrañe, Italiano: Fargli Sentire la Tua Mancanza, Deutsch: Wie ich ihn dazu bekomme mich zu vermissen, Français: faire pour que vous lui manquiez, Русский: заставить его скучать по тебе, 中文: 让他想念你, Bahasa Indonesia: Membuat Dia Merindukan Anda, Nederlands: Ervoor zorgen dat hij je gaat missen, Čeština: Jak zařídit, aby vás postrádal, ไทย: ทำให้เขาคิดถึงคุณ, Tiếng Việt: Khiến chàng nhớ bạn, العربية: جعل الشاب يشتاق إليك, 日本語: 彼氏の気を引く, 한국어: 그가 당신을 그리워하게 만드는 방법, हिन्दी: अपने हसबैंड या बॉयफ्रेंड को अपनी याद दिलाएँ
If you cannot control your feelings, then I would suggest for you not to maintain a relationship with this person. Furthermore, I always think it’s vital to any starting point in dating or a relationship to be clear about each other’s expectations. If you are looking for a relationship, then let the other person know early on! If not, then say so. There have been too many times that I’ve seen a woman dating a man for months on end, only to end up getting hurt because it became a purely physical “modern relationship” in which the man never truly committed. The two never set the expectations for a relationship, or the woman sat in silence out of fear of being pushed away, hoping he would come around.
Exactly Why Guys Start Acting Distant All Of A Sudden (And What To Do About It) Why Men Pull Away: 3 Easy Ways To Stop A Man From Withdrawing: Infographic The Real Reasons Men Pull Away When They Are Falling In Love How To Tell If He’s Testing You By Pulling Away From You The Real Reasons Why Men Pull Away After Getting Close Why Men Pull Away In The Early Stages: How To Get Your New Guy Back
So im a year younger than him, hes off back home from uni and next year he is moving to a uni closer to home, it turns out hes going to the uni ive wanted to go to since i was 14 but i wont be going uni for annother year after, he finally decided 2 week before he goes home that he doesnt want to be with me as the long distance thing wont work though its like half an hour on the train, and not to long ago we was making plans about me going down to see him he says its not that im not worth it but that we both constantly will be unhappy and paranoid and worrying tho he litrally lives a 40 min bus drive away now and it was never a problem. I cant help but feel like theres annother reason tho he swears theres not. Its very fresh and im yet to get my belongings so the no contact phaze isnt in action but ild like to know if it would work for a situation that involves distance, and well unis not exactly filled with classyness when it comes to relationships ect.alls i want is for him to atleast try and make a go of things, even if it doesnt work out it would mean ild know we tried and theres nothing we could of done. Hope you can help
Answer: Cut him loose. If you think that he’s cheating on you or is interested in someone else, don’t pursue him. If you take the time to step back and he doesn’t show any effort to reel you back in, then, either way, it wasn’t meant to be. If you think that he’s attracted to another woman, find someone who will be fully committed to loving you. [Read: Should you ever forgive a cheating partner?]

And it was a big catastroph. X was so angry he left me, he insulted and shouted. He came back to do the things he didnt do when he was with me. I cried a lot and begged him not to leave. I did all that i can do. One day he called me to talk together. When he saw me, he hugged me he was calm and lovely he sad we can fix everything together. I was sooo happyy but the next day he woke up angry again and said he cant forgive me and he is not forgetting what i did i begged him again and again but it didnt work

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